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Are you more or less tolerant? - - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]We think that in regards to your own appearance that you just cannot take the negativity that will be thrown your way too seriously. When we first formed this profile there was a group that threw parties that had a strict "undressed code" as to how you should look naked. A lot of people understandably got offended and there was a lot of banter and unfriendliness in the forums. We actually got several invitations, from some members of that group to join. We declined the invitations but we were surprised we were invited. For all the banter back and forth we would not have been welcome due to our age and or some sort of flaw in the body. Perhaps the exclusivity was the sell point and the members were more average than you would expect. Not that there is anything wrong with average. What the hell is average appearance anyway? Acceptance meant you were a notch above the rest in the eyes of the members as in the only true swingers. Does feeling sexy about yourself have to come at the expense of others? I do not know if that group still exist anymore. The founder fell in love and went monogamous last I knew. Well about that same time we submitted application as it were to join an older longer established group that puts together parties because we thought the parties looked like fun. About 60 days after our submission to join the group was sent we got back an e-mail declining our participation. We could get upset and lose time and joy wondering if we just were not sexy enough to be considered among the elite or we could just move on and know we were still going to find new and exciting people and adventures anyway. The real reasons for denial are only found within the person or persons that said no and if they have their reasons those same reasons do not make them bad people. I like to think that way at least. Mrs. Delicious just told me, as she was walking out the door to an appointment, that if they don't like her there must be something wrong with them. We can imagine until the cows come home and we will probably never guess right and it really does not matter anyway. I like to think the group, that told us no, is fun and is having fun but will just not know us. You cannot be part of everything anyway. The tendency for us to imagine that any group that might reject us is full of miserable losers that would not know sexy if it bit them is not good for us and the no was probably delivered with a lot less intolerance than we are imagining. I think we should concentrate on discovering more joy by fully focusing on the doors that are open to us. We are all going to get rejected from time to time and it might hurt but don't dwell on it. Opportunities to connect and to live and love surround us all. [/quote] Well written my friend and as a single male in this lifestyle this is something that needs to be preached and practiced

Anyone going to the BNL concert? - Wendover, Feb 13th - I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that many swingers are probably fans of Barenaked Ladies (and not because of the name of the band... it's just that we've never met a BNL fan fan we didn't like. =) Anyone else making the trip for the show?

Can you be in love AND swing? If so, tell us how! - - Just what the hell is a life coach? Is that the new name people, without the proper education, training, and licensure, who counsel others are calling themselves today? I am a professional counselor, licensed and trained to do what I do. My Lady and I met on line at a swingers site and met over coffee at a local public pub. We ended back at her place for a great evening of sex....after an even better afternoon of intelligent conversation. That was two years ago and we have been together ever since. She has moved in with me, carries her own weight in all ways helping run "our" home. We swing, or would not be on this sight....lol, together and seperately. We are deeply in love and have decided to get married, because we do love, respect, cherish, honor and trust each other. Distrust and worry has nothing to do with playing with others, if you trust your partner, have done your own self examination and healed your own life wounds. Our sex life is absolutely GREAT!!!! Our swinging with other people is fun and an enhancement to our love making. I love to see the smile on her face, the spring in her step, and the gleem in her eye after she has been with one of her lovers...male or female. She loves to hear whether or not I had a good time and enjoyed myself with another lover. We may play seperately at times, but I know she is coming home to me...that is where her heart is! And I will always come home to her because that is where my heart and soul are! My professional discipline teaches to respect others and work with the client where they are. I am not to judge them or impose my values on them. When seeking guidance or help from a helping professional...and I mean licensed, trained professonal....do not ask their advise, nor follow their moral code. Each of us is a unique individual with different moral values, belief systems, and desires. As long as we are not harming another being or ourselves, then all is fair, fun, and healthy. Anything may be overindulged in...therefore, moderation is the key. If I drink too much I may be an alcoholic which is a problem, if I drink heavily I may just be a heavy drinker...the key is whether or not what I am doing harms others, my self or results in problems in my life or the life of people I love. You are correct in questioning whether or not swinging is for you, and if it results in any discomfort for either of you, talk openly and non-judgementally with each other. Love, as the saying goes, means never having to say your sorry. But love is open, trusting, non-threating, non-controlling, and is open to the opinions of each other. Because I deeply and honestly love my Lady and she me....her happiness and pleasure is more important than any thing to me. As one individual stated this will be my third marriage too. She completes me like no other person can. Best of hard work to get where you are comfortable looking at your mate and your self in the mirror....it well worth it what ever you decide.

What is up with Utah?! - Swingers in Utah and nowhere else? - Wooo Hoooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can't wait to have you guys back here again. hugs and kisses

Help us out.. Take this Survey - For Utah Swingers - Done, would be interested in the results.

We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - ya mail my t shirt and boxers back god damn it, they are my only pair without stains!! lol seriously sorry to hear about your bad time S & C

KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - We watched it last night. It was totally one sided and from a bitter woman looking to lay blame for her failed marriage. She thought that swinging would fix her marriage. This is the most ridicules thing I heard. First of all if you don't have a 100% strong and trusting relationship then stay away. This is not marriage counseling. Second of all about the STD, play it safe or understand the risk. Third don't throw around the religion card to get sympathy. We are all adults and make choices be adult enough to live with the ones you make. As for the therapist she was way of base bringing in the emotion of love to the swinging world. There is a difference between sex and love, one is a act of the way you treat and live with your other and one is purely to satisfy a animal instinct we choose to satisfy. This was a one person bitch session to get even for her own failures in life not a fair say on both sides.

Friend collectors or swingers - - We don't fuck people we don't consider friends. But you don't HAVE to fuck us to be our friend. Our friend list, right now, has maybe a dozen couples on it...only one of which we are currently (and infrequently, I might add) playing with. Personally, we're not looking for more people to play with until this whole COVID thing is a LOT more under control. Like SweettAndH, we prune the garden quite frequently and usually delete "friends" if there is no movement to get to know one another better in some way within several weeks at most. *shrug*

Too Young? - Are we just too young... - I personally don't think you're too young. However, you have to ask yourselves this. Are there couples here that you would consider too old? I have a son your age. I am 39 this year. Sexually speaking, I don't think any age above 18 is off-limits. However, not everyone is in the lifestyle just for sex alone. Many want friends etc. Age [u]usually[/u] dictates one's maturity level. Not always. Most older swingers will shy away or be leery of young swingers because, 1) Swinger parties have alcohol. 2) Maturity or lack thereof. 3) Insecurity about their aging faces/bodies compared to yours. Let's face it, everyone has something that they're turned on or off by. You just have to roll with it. I personally think you two deserve a fair shake. ;) Don't let others' choices get your down. Remember, everyone turning you down is in turn getting turned down by someone else. I don't care how hot they seem. Don

Alex - New to the lifestyle looking for my first encounter into couples and single females - Utahldscouple / openmarriage - My mistake. I read two different responses and mistakenly attributed them both to openmarriage! The other was "don’t understand how single guys can be swingers". My bad.