Neola Swingers in Utah

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The vent! - Judgements, I'm so tired of them. - On judgments: My wife and I were in the lifestyle for many years. She died 5 years ago of cancer and was the love of my life. It has been very hard for me as we were married for 34 years. Many of our friends were swingers because, as others have found, those not involved in the lifestyle often have negative judgmental attitudes. We made many friends. After she died I was supported by my friends but I was no longer invited to parties. For a while that was fine because I wasn't ready. But since I've tried to renew my lifestyle activities, I've found that I am no longer welcome. Why? Because I'm a single male. Forget that my wife and I were involved in the lifestyle up in Seattle, forget the many times we hosted parties at our house, my wife's death made me a pariah to other swingers. I really do not understand this. I'm still the same person. I'm discrete, clean, disease and drug free, I'm not pushy and no always means no. I guess I do not understand why all of a sudden I'm no longer welcome at parties i used to attend. Yes, many people not in the lifestyle judge those of us who are. But a large number of people in the lifestyle are just as judgmental, only they pretend that they are not.

I’m defense of single males - Funny old geezers - Here’s my two cents on why there is so much distain for single males on this site. First, the very name of this site suggests that it’s a platform for swingers, meaning SM are barking up the wrong trees. Yes, there are definitely couples on here who like MFM etc (i certainly do) but the fact that it is predominantly a swinger site should suggest to single guys that they and what they offer only appeals to a small subset of people here, and they should lay low and take a back seat rather than trying to be front and center. In my opinion, single guys should feel like guests here. They’re the third wheel, after all. We know there are single guys who are ready and willing to fuck our wives…let us come to you rather than being in our face. Any guy with even average EQ should understand this. Second and just as important….maybe think twice before you hit “submit” on a comment you want to make because more often than not the comments from single guys are cringe-worthy. If you hid the profiles of a random set of comments, I guarantee I could pick which were written by the single guys. You say, “I do however, love being a third and love meeting new people and wish to get more involved. “. Yes, you and every single male on the planet. Single males…do you have a place here? Sure. But your place is not to make up 50% of the content when a MUCH smaller percentage of people here are interested. Back into the woodwork a little bit and you might get a better reception. Happy 4th!

Swingers Party - Doesnt mean who ever is there is open to everyone elsa - We went to a Swingers Party for the New Year and have to say it was the worse I ever been to. Maybe it was us but I dont think if you go to a swingers party gives anyone the right to stick their tongue in your mouth that you dont know. I saw this going on and thought well alot of people here know eachother. Nope, turns out that wasnt the case. Most seem to enjoy the hellow I am so and so now open your mouth I am coming in. I been in the swing life style for more than 10 years and I dont ever think I put my tongue down anyones wife. And I never had it happen to my wife. So when some guy walks up and within mins of small talk goes after my wife with open mouth the first thing I thought of was to see how she handles it. I know my wife like most of us do. After she let him know that wasnt her thing she turned to me and started to tell me how most the guys acted when I wasnt in eye sight. I wasnt to happen to learn that everything I thought I knew about swingers came to a end. I always went to meet people and if we found a cpl we like took it from there. Didnt know if you attend a swingers party your free game for anyone. I wont attend another party with this group again. So , am I going over board with this or am I in the right?

Swingers unnerve families at hotel - - Very true Tammy and WALT we was there also i was wondering how could they see in the ballroom it was completly blocked off and u had to walk way down the hall to even get inside the ballroom, shoot i could not even see in theballroom was so dark!! lol so to all the assuming people do not always believe what you hear!!!

what the f#%@ was he thinking? - swingers still deserve respect - Agree with Cpl2... Just too many of them out there typing with one hand, so to speak, to worry about it. Click ignore, keep a smile on your face and move on. Life is to short to worry about people like that. Just remember,... while you are actually out making some fun new freindships... he's still parked at that keyboard wishing he had enough going for him to get a sniff of your life... not to mention your wife... lol ;)

I am Getting Fed Up With The Way This Site Doesn't Work - - Best thing about swinger sites is guess what "swingers" this is about meeting like minded people. Get over the techy glitches, get out there and F(*& someone. I promise you will feel better.

does anyone else go through periods of doubt? - as to whether this lifestyle is what they want? - You sound perfectly normal to me. Some people need a real connection with a person to make a connection, whether it be physical or otherwise. Some swingers (especially the men) can just do it with anybody, it's just something new, that's good enough. Personally, I like to have a strong physical attraction to someone before I consider sex with them. Another thing you mention, I believe is also similar to me, I'm a giver, not a receiver. I love to perform oral, men or women,(and I'm told I'm really good at it :)) but I'm not that good at receiving it (from either sex) until that person has really learned me(how I like to be touched or licked), and it may take a few times together, and sometimes either I or they don't have the patience, lol But performing it on others, especially when they're really enjoying it is a huge turn-on for me. So anyway the bottom line is...who's to say what's normal or not, don't worry about it. The lifestyle is mostly about being free to enjoy yourself and others. So, you like what you like, enjoy yourself, if others don't like it, let them move on.

We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - On a funny note the guy was in such a hurry he left his boxers and t shirt. Maybe I should mail them to him???

Only 12 couples within 100 miles on our search - Just using the search criterion of :non smoking, slim or athletic, 35-55, couples, soft swap yes, st - Well it is nice to get some intelligent on topic responses. Yes my original intent was unclear. I wanted to ask about the search function as so many times it seemed like I must be doing something wrong. I was frustrated at how you have to reenter all the parameters each time. And some of the parameters are different in search compared to what you can select in the profiles??? For instance in Soft swap in the profile you can respond with a yes, no, or maybe. Also how do you sort by excluding a yes in some parameter.? After playing with this feature I also noticed that some searches would get 2 pages of results and then I would go back and think I only changed one thing and get 20++ pages. The fact that I could NOT save the searches and be sure I just changed one parameter even though I thought I did was a pain as well. In all this I started to see some interesting trends that I was going to report on but by that time the thread had been hijacked. Originally I reported my search results for this specific search and the criterion I used solely for help in this matter and being so stupid not to realize that I offended Smokers, bi guys, and folks not average or less. Oh and I forgot folks under 35. I am surprised not all the folks who have been members over 365 days didn't throw stones too. I wont be starting another thread ever is the overall result of this. Whatever my intent was is not important now. I just want to say that we usually search and have met some folks outside of those original parameters and yes personality and many other factors can make the overall experience great. We don't have to call ourselves swingers and so many of you have made it clear in another caustic post like this that we do not qualify as swingers yet and shouldn't even be on this site. I agree. Have a good Life!

How to find other swingers - - Great idea... what color would a straight single male wear?