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When does interest become pushy??? - - I've been thinking of this topic a lot since it first came out. I appreciate all of the comments made. EVILDOERS said, "Confidence is sexy", and I agree. I see a coupe of things here worthy of comment. First, in this game, women are totally in control. Sex is probably the strongest power position they have. All men want it, women control it. When they say no, or not interested, it's the end of the line for a man. HOW they say it is different. And how a man receives the rejection is different. Anybody who knows me social or professionally would never characterize me as shy. I'm outspoken and engaged most of the time. Because I've been rejected less than politely for advances in the swingers scene before, and after a lot of retrospection didn't deserve the rudeness of the rebukes, I'm a little more reserved, maybe even gun shy. The fact is, in this lifestyle, no matter how good you are, sooner or later you're going to get rejected. The person doing the rejecting may have had a bad day and be less than polite, but it also could be that you're not handling rejection well. Recently at a meet and greet I made an advance that seemed more than just welcomed, almost asked for, but was politely refused. I misread the signals, obviously. That happens to all of us at some time or another. The lady was polite in her refusal, and I think that's the key. I think at some time or another we all will give signals that welcome an advance, but do so in error. When an advance comes that we don't want we can reject it, but doing so politely is key. It's simple common courtesy. If the person making the advance persist, then something stronger may be necessary. Again, common courtesy would be to desist when told to do so. It's all about treating people with respect. We're in this lifestyle to be sexually connected with others. Advances are generally, but not always, welcome and expected. We need to be polite and respectful in both our advances and rejections, whichever side we're on. Mr. Sexperimentors

Sensitivities - a paradox? - I think you're right that "L'S'ers" vary in personality and other traits just like the mainstream population. I think there is a "liberal" stigma associated with the lifestyle that just isn't true. I mean seriously, why would it be any different than the mainstream? The only thing most people here do differently is their sex life. Some people here fuck like bunnies on Friday and Saturday and go beg their god for forgiveness on Sunday. A lot of swingers are more conservative than most vanillas. "Swinging" only makes one sexually liberal. Swinging is a sexuality trait and not a lifestyle. It may be considered a lifestyle for those that constantly evade friends, work, church and family in their daily pursuit of hook-ups. However, as a libertine, "swinging" is only one aspect, of a liberal lifestyle that I, myself, wish to obtain. It's not a necessity, yet not forbidden... It's a choice I can make with no consequence.

To message first or not - Do you reach out first? - I have been the writer in almost all of our attempts to reach out to people. I agree that the answers are nowhere near the proportion of messages. I try to remember it's similar to a salesperson prospecting or a major league baseball hitter. You're considered successful if you connect 3 out of every ten times. Anyway, we are both bi and actually met through another swingers website. We would love to chat with you and meet for a drink. If we click, we are open to playing on the first meet. Look forward to your reply. Ed and Gill [quote=Bicouplemarried]I started out strong messaging then I stopped not allot of results. I found more by posting on here saying hey this is us and what where looking for. And going to moose Lounge. Or I message people I see active in the forum. With that said Sammie hit is up if your interested. Or I'm guessing you go to New rec centre I'm there every morning. Good luck.[/quote]

Meeting new swingers? - Where to meet them? - We have met most via the web. The first couples we met were at a club but since then is all the web.. We have also noticed that a lot of local couples say they want to meet but when presented with a genuine couple that is local (same town or next one over) we try to meet and then get the

Black Ring, Right Hand - How to tell if someone's a swinger - [quote=TMACA]The thing is, even though people in the vanilla world may know about something like black rings on the right hand, they probably won't notice it, especially with all the people wearing multiple rings nowadays. Most people just aren't all that observant. On the other hand, swingers who know about it will probably look for them. And if someone who doesn't also have one on asks you what's with the black ring, you can just say,"I like it." And if they then say "Did you know that it can mean ....?", you can say something like "Why do you think that?", or "Where'd you hear that?", which can lead to them saying they swing, or let you get out of the conversation without admitting anything yourself.~ Terry[/quote] That may be true up to a point but think about what other cues you see when you see an attractive couple and wonder if they're swingers. Dress a little sexier than normal, act a little flirtier or maybe dance a little dirtier (if they're at a club), are constantly looking around checking out other people. That doesn't happen in the vanilla world. Most guys would at very least get an elbow to the gut if their lady caught them openly checking out an attractive girl. In swinging, the lady will often check out the attractive girl right along with her husband. I still think that the majority of swingers wouldn't wear the rings even if they became "a thing". As someone mentioned this isn't a new concept. People have been talking about ways to make it easier to identify other swingers when out and about almost since the day we started swinging decades ago. On another swing site we're on they even made a mobile app that people could put on their smart phones that would alert them if another swinger was nearby and also had the app turned on. If the app showed (by GPS) another swinger near you you could send them a text. It was a colossal failure to say the least. I know there are definitely a small percentage of swingers who would wear black rings and/or use an app but the majority would likely not due to fear of discovery. Why do you think many or most profiles have face pics only in the locked sections and mention discretion so ubiquitously? Especially here in Utah where the prevailing religion has such strict morality codes, many people would rightly be afraid of losing their jobs and social standing if discovered. JMO

Lifestyle vacations - Best place for a lifestyle vacation? - We just booked at Hedonism for young swingers week. It looks crazy!

Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - How is this for sexy?

Swinger & 🦄 Bait - An experiment to attract swingers and unicorns. - No unicorn bait to be seen at Vasa in AF, Utah... Guess we should bring some.

Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - I have a 2003 GMC step-side pickup, and the wife drives a 2002 Explorer. Both are in like new condition. I believe in keeping our cars in perfect shape. I'm an old muscle car fanatic. My high school ride was a '66 Chevelle SS w/ a 396. Sure wish I still had that one. Low 12's at about 121 in the 1/4. A couple of recent changes - last Thursday, the GMC truck got totaled in a wreck in front of our house. It was parked on the street at the time. And I just got a 2012 BMW 1 series coupe. It was used, but it was also a Factory Executives car. BMW gives their Exec a free car every year, with any options they want. This one is[u] LOADED[/u]. I'm just like a kid when I drive it. We haven't even tried to get into the back seat yet, much less trying to have any fun. Sure sounds great, tho. If anyone knows a spinner who'd like to experiment, let us know.

Who is going to Younge swingers week HEDO? - anyone going? - Anyone going? cause we are :) wanted to see who we would meet there