Retsof Swingers in New_york

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Place to Hang out and Play - Have an Idea - It surely seams that the number of swingers in Utah is LARGE. I have heard some thing before like, (Utah has the most subscriptions to sexy magazines per capita) and that the numbers of swingers in Utah is in the top 5 on the list. So with all those people how is it Utah is still so controlling of what the people want? Here in Florida we have ON PREMISE clubs that are completely legal. Yes every now and then the news tries to gain a few points with the religious WRONG. For the most part if the club keeps it's nose clean everyone else stays out of it. We also have house parties and places called house parties that are 3 days a week every week. It's by invitation only and you BYO-drinks, a dish to pass and most donate to the cause. Keep in mind these are BY INVITATION ONLY... Meaning if you don't donate you may never be invited back. The owners DO live there and have regular bills sent to these homes. There are some that move around from hotel to hotel also. By invitation only... About a year ago a house party was busted out in the sticks. A few people were harassed by the local news jerks. Since then that TV station has lost a large number of people watching them due to their ON CAMERA BS... We are members of an ON PREMISE club in Port Richey, Fl. The police have been trying to find a reason to shut our doors a few times. 1st go around was people that lived in the vicinity. This brought on an investigation and the TV NEWS CREWS. They interviewed many of the homeowners and also the people in the stores below the club. Well the neighborhood wanted us out and the store owners wanted us to stay pointing out how clean and decent things have been since the BAR upstairs became a nice quiet swingers club. About 6 months or so ago the TV NEWS crews were at it again. This time the people in the neighborhood watch all around the club had said their crime rate had dropped like a rock. NO reports of anyone ever needing the police or an ambulance and no homeless people hanging around trying to sponge off people anymore either. Also no broken bottles in the parking lot. So now the locals are happy with us... Go figure...

What would you do? - what does a person do when their spouse no longer wishes to paticipate - Well. How amazing that the "couple in question" just happens to be in my home town. And my wife and I are at a serious impasse about the same subject, but in the "traditional direction" i.e. I still want it. She still doesn't. I'm... very surprised that a bunch of Swingers are so unanimous that "No trumps yes": that swinging is just something you do - but are ashamed of enough that any "no" in the group instantly defines the partner's life as well. Why isn't "yes" just as valid? In our case, we've been married for over 25 years. We've had a very-good run. Our children are grown and gone. We're financially comfortable. And we're still physically capable - as we watch our parents be physically unable to walk, hear, see, pee, or do much of anything to enjoy *anything* - the point there being that I hear the clock ticking and to me, this is THE time of life to reap one's reward for the life one has lead - before it's too late to do anything but try to keep breathing. And for me, being honest, the ONE thing that is my reward - is erotic fun. Let me be clear that what I crave is *erotic fun* - not just madly try to find someone new to fuck and never see again - but partners who want to wallow in the erotic experience of "Truth or Dare" and Lifestyle conventions and teasing and games. That's IT for me. That's why "doing it" is called "doing IT". And I've been a great husband/father/responsible citizen for over 50 years. And I feel that there isn't anything else in my life that really gives me a "reason for living". And my wife, bless her, just has never had any passion. She enjoys it when I have sex with her. When I give her a nice massage followed by 3 or 4 orgasms. But she's happy with twice a month or less. And she had no need at all for my "erotic experiences". So here we are. And over the last 10 years we've tried pretty-much every possibility: traditional fidelity, me cheating, us swinging, me swinging alone with her permission... and it always ultimately winds up that the only way she is not *miserable* is if I'm following "traditional fidelity". And the only way I'm not miserable - is if I have the freedom to pursue erotic associations. Now. If my passion were bowling, there wouldn't be a problem. If her passion were gardening or shoe shopping, there wouldn't be a problem. Everybody would just tell us to do our thing without the other - and enjoy what we *do* enjoy together. But somehow sex is THE one that we have to do *together* or not at all. So we're very very seriously trying to figure out if we'd both be happier by tearing up a marriage and going our separate ways. We can all *say* that whoever does NOT want to swing - rules the day, but imagine whatever your very-favorite thing is to do. Then imagine your spouse telling you: "I don't like to do that, so WE won't ever do that and You won't do it without me - and you won't do it alone, either - ever again". Now what?

Separating the lines of emotion and raw physical gratification in - - [quote=Loverofthewife][quote=Canvas]Completely giving yourself to the one you love...riding bareback while looking into each other's eyes between kissing....and looking deep into the eyes to the brink of orgasm....to me, this is the deepest and most sacred (not in the religious sense) of acts. The mix of physical and emotional connection is synergistic. For the full-on swappers out there: How do you separate emotional attachment from the raw sexual gratification? Can you allow yourselves some level of attachment during the act to get a fuller effect ...then, without issues, fully detach upon completion? Given my wife and I have not been with anyone else since we were 15 years old, it is difficult to envision what all this is like. Obviously, I can imagine and even long for the excitement of experiencing someone new and different. However, having no experience, the lines of emotion and raw physical gratification elude me.[/quote] Why do you need to detach upon completion? Why not have a raging crush for the mistress/mister on the side? Wade in slowly, be 100% honest with your spouse, and a little romance is fun. Spices up your life & your spouse also gets to benefit...[/quote] IMO if you need and seek an emotional bond (beyond friendship) from someone other than your spouse or significant other that clearly shows your needs are unfortunately not being met, and is a sad state of a relationship. I assume most swingers are swingers for purely physical sexual diversity, and probably don’t want their partner to connect with someone who is looking for a romantic connection (is looking for love in all the wrong places 🎶 lol) ... good luck

2 Year Anniversary Party for Swingers in Knoxville,Tn. - BYOB, On-premise Swingers Party - Destiny's 2 Year Anniversary Party Saturday night, March 11th 8pm until ??? Quality Inn Motel Callahan Road Exit #110 2nd Floor Meeting rooms (above Lobby) BYOB, On-premise, with decorations throughout the dancing, eating, and seating area. Private play areas and open play areas are sectioned off for your fun and games. We have several games to play, if you like strip poker, strip bingo, or toss the rings around the 3' inflated cock, and we have two other games people like to play also, called "pin the cock on the stud, and pin the boobs on the gal". Guarantee you'll enjoy yourself and have fun while you're there. Rules and guidelines are posted on the web sites for more information. http://www.webspawner.com/users/destinyssocials/index.html http://www.webspawner.com/users/destinytw39/index.html There is a door donation to attend. Hope to see you there!!! Take Care, Play Safe, and Enjoy Life......Tammy

I Have A Question - Poly vs. Open - [quote=PAIRPLAYERS][quote=EVILDOERS]Thanks for the responses so far. I thought of a couple of additional questions. Are you seeking, finding and connecting with other open/poly people here on Swingular or are you finding people thru other means? Also, do you find that most of the people you connect with are single or are they in their own primary relationships? Does it matter much to you if they are single or coupled?[/quote] Great question. Almost exclusively non swinger community singles surprisingly. Have tried amongst the swingers but they seem to have a very quid pro quo mentality. [/quote] Yes, they do! We noticed that dynamic almost immediately when we first entered the lifestyle and were actually talking about it just today in the context of no quid pro quo being a distinct positive in the column of open or poly lifestyles vs. swinging. SO many times when I was even just TALKING to a woman her partner or husband would basically go grab Ms. Evil, no matter what she was doing or who she was talking to, and assume it was perfectly okay to just do more or less whatever he wanted. After all, I was doing something/anything with HIS partner! Wow! Great responses everyone. SO informative! Thank-you.

Best Swingers club in Cincinnati area? - Swingers clubs - Dane- Many thanks for the honest and informative answer. This is why we really do like ClubSinDay...owners are down-to-earth, straight forward, honest and SUPER friendly!!

Funny Joke About Forums - How Many Forum Members Does It Take to Change A Lightbulb? - :i Don't you all think this should have been posted under "Lifestyle Questions" since the basis of the inquiry was to determine how many forum posters from this, a swingers site, it would take to perform a given task? So, it is a question from a swinger about swingers... definately a "Lifestyle Question". Sorta like this one: "How many single men, on a swinger site, does it take to get 5 pages of forum comments from fellow swingers?" Apparently 1 if he's from another planet and a profound tard. Definately a lifestyle question. :z just couldnt resist

Swingers Next Door! - ABC news story on Swinging! - Okay I just watched NWB on the DVR and I'm not ashamed to say that I smell an Emmy. [em]Emo_84[/em] Except for that dumb cunt Brittany. Fucking whore has totally been texting ME too. I hope Cody makes her sleep on the couch. [em]Emo_25[/em]

A fine line. - - Trying to stick to the OP intent here. [quote=CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL][quote=EVILDOERS] we often find it difficult to walk the fine line between being nice, polite, and social with other people when we do not actually feel an attraction to them. If we had a week at desires it would be easier to be nice and talk with everyone. However adult hours are not easy to come by so we do find this line hard. My wife will talk with a friendly person or couple the whole night. Even if the couple is in some committed deal. I have been working on getting her to direct her time on couples she can see us doing something mor. Or limit the time she spends and move along. Do you at some point just say honestly that while they are nice it just ain't gonna happen? We only feel this is needed it they ask us if we want to get a room. At that time you just have to say something and it is never easy. Do you make some sort of lame excuse and beat a hasty retreat hoping they will get the hint? Do you move on to another couple that you are attracted to and look annoyed when the first couple follows you around all night. Of course some people just won't take a hint or take "no" for an answer and for those you DO have to be blunt. This is one method that does seem to work. It is easier if you do it early on in the timeline like the first 5 mins or less. So what techniques do y'all use in situations like this? How do you be nice to others without necessarily encouraging them? [b]Seriously? I mean, you don't know how to interact with others and carry on a conversation without having them believe you want to hop in the sack with them?[/b] Its not that easy.. How do you walk over to a couple and start to talk to them at a swingers party and not have them think you want the Mor?

Can REAL FRIENDSHIPS in the Lifestyle TRULY exist? - More than just meeting and having fun - We believe you can have swinger friends as \"real\" friends. We have several couples that we consider to be our real friends. A couple of them, we have been to their house and they have been to our with both of our kids around and did as any other \"vertical\" couples would be. One couple especially, we\'ve been to their house with our kids and their kids were home on many occasions for a pool party, for labor day, for even their oldest\'s graduation, gone to a comedy club with other swingers as a group and just to get together and hang out. They have helped us move our belongings from house to house when we moved across town. We keep in touch alot even if its through a IM\'s on a messenger. The ones we consider friends are the people that want to be friends in and out of the bedroom. And we seem to pull it off with the right people that way. Just have to find the right combinations. Plus it seems the area we live in, we have a great community of swingers, so it makes it easier to be friends in/out of the bedroom. Jerry and Jen