Fairbury Swingers in Nebraska

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What about the lifestyle didn't meet your expectations? - Preconceptions and disappointment. - I'm home bored, so stop here if you don't want to read a bunch of shite. lol. I think we both entered the lifestyle with some preconceived notions of what the people in the LS would be like, but that was mostly from our limited experience with being vanilla and having LS peeps try to hit on us. It just seemed creepy, desperate and gross at the time. We assumed most of the players would be super aggressive, ready to fuck anyone and have zero interest in relationships outside of sex. Our initial entry was simply to watch and be watched. We quickly learned that there are just as many wonderful people in the LS as out of it. Maybe more. There will always be the outliers, the few percentage on each end of the spectrum that are more extreme, but that happens in any population. Overall, it was a happy surprise. So that would be a negative expectation that wasn't met. As far as things we were hoping would happen or expectation that weren't met, we have very few. But we also went into the labyrinth without really expecting or assuming anything. I don't think we were naive enough to think that this segment of the population was somehow immune from the social characteristics that reveal themselves in any other social class or group. You will always have the "cool kids" the "shy people" the "jocks" the "geeks" the people who classify themselves as the "pity party" and blame the world for their problems. Those things will exist anywhere and should. Swingers are a diverse group of people with a few, maybe very few, common goals. Those goals I think are to meet others with social deviancy and those interested in expanding their sexual experiences or simply to meet new friends. Swinging, in itself, doesn't solidify your beliefs in anything else (politics, food preferences, choice of travel location, or even how or what you are looking for as swingers). I think that is where expectations can fail. If a person goes into a situation thinking, "I/we think "x" so everyone else must think "x" as well", they are bound to be disappointed. I've said this a lot of times, the lifestyle is not black and white. Life isn't black and white. There will be frustrations around every turn if you allow yourself to be duped into thinking your way of thinking is more than just your viewpoint, that it is universal to everyone. I see people complaining of flakes, people who meet once then run away, etc. That's how they roll. That's their truth. It's what they are comfortable with or wanting and who am I to judge. That being said, I don't have to associate with them and hopefully learn how to avoid that situation or become more efficient at finding people with similar interests. The lifestyle is work. Sometimes a lot of work. I think it's foolish to think that it should be easy to find 4 people who all jive. Think about how many people you have dated before settling on the right one for you. And to assume that somehow changes in the lifestyle and that after chatting on kik for a few weeks then meeting over drinks will somehow magically connect you. Ugh. Sometimes it happens. Sometimes not. But I wouldn't expect it. For others, the thought of any connection past the one-nighter is absurd. Why would you want to make friends with your fuck-buddies? It may be too risky and cause too many emotions. Point is, we are all different and that is what makes the journey so beautiful. And, just a note about flakes, since it is a recurrent theme. Yes, maybe there are more flakes in the lifestyle, but I'm guessing it's specifically related to the nature of the LS. Swinging for some can be very intimidating and frightening. Sometimes the chase is much more fun than the fucking. Not excusing them that do flake, it seems a problem for sure, but I think I understand, at least in part, why it happens so much. There is so much social pressure not to be in the lifestyle and most were brought up without it being the normal way to live. So society is telling us we are wrong, gross, deviant, etc. Add to that the fear of actually getting naked and fucking someone else and it can cause a lot of anxiety in some. When we first started we were petrified to even go the parties thinking it was going to be a fuck/rape fest. lol. Turned out we were wrong but it was a learning process. Lastly, if you are already treading carefully and the couple/person you are supposed to be meeting gives off any bad vibes, maybe flaking is best. It's hard not to hurt someone's feelings and honesty isn't always what happens. I know we have been honest with couples and it turned into a shit-show. Why don't you like us? If you only meet us and give us a chance we can prove we are wonderful. Other's like us, why don't you. It's hard to be honest at times about why there isn't a connection. May flaking be a way to spare feelings? I don't know. There are probably a plethora (Hefe, do you know what a plethora is?)of reasons people flake and some of those my be that they are just douches. But likely there are other people that aren't and are just trying to get out of a situation they are unfamiliar with. Avoid the douches but maybe give those others a second chance. Evil: always good topics you bring to the table. So you think because people like sex they should be good at it? I know a lot of people who love food but suck at cooking. haha. Maybe having too many options on the table can also make people lazy. I don't have to try hard if I know tomorrow is another partner. To some it's the quantity and not the quality. But I can see why the expectation would be there. All in all we really have no complaints. It's been a fascination journey. Some ups, some downs, but always and adventure. We will keep our expectations low, both of ourselves and those around us. Less disappointment that way. I'm going back to sitting in my underwear, drinking a beer and watching TV. Zero expectations. haha. :) Mr. SRO

Any swingers advise for Spain? - Swing clubs in Madrid - [quote=FUN4ALL208]One thing to watch out for are escorts(prostitutes) if you see an odd couple say an obese Turkish man with a hot lil thing. Escort. Half the time they'll say they aren't going to do anything, just want to watch their "girlfriend" have some fun. Just don't do it. Same goes with most of the swinger clubs in Europe. Sorry we don't have a recommendation for a club.[/quote] I dunno about Spain, but the STD thing isn't much of a problem among the licensed prostitutes/escorts in Germany, it's legal, and they're careful and have regular checkups, so I'd say have fun with the girl and let the old perv watch and jack off. Who cares? And a lot of the prostitutes over there are otherwise "normal" girls. The old cliche about the girl working her way through college? Happens in Germany, and some other European counties. Prostitution isn't exactly a high class job, but doing it while young doesn't necessarily ruin a girl's whole life. Different laws, and a different social attitude. Now that doesn't apply to streetwalkers, who are most likely drug addicts, and may also not apply in Spain. It's a highly Catholic country, and while I don't know their laws, I wouldn't be surprised if prostitution was illegal there, and if they had all the problems associated with it that exist in the U.S.

Rock Hill or Close by!!!!!!!!! - Whats Up(2 Questions) - We are right outside of Columbia and we reviewed you profile. We found your pics to show you 2 to be an attractive couple and from that we would love to hook up with you, but the rest of your profile is why we haven't contacted you. We are non smokers and look for the same, we also enjoy full swap and enjoy the erotisism of kissing and that is a no go in your profile. We don't consider ourselves major swingers, we enjoy making friends first, enjoy full swap, like others to be shaved, respect my wife to the fullest, no cumming in her mouth, are the main rules we have. They are our preferences and you have yours. We agree there are alot of wanna bees and BS artists on all the sites, but with time you will find a few super cpls that you will become friends with and alot more. But remember you have rules and things that are turn offs to others just like us and well, as we always say "No wine will be served before its time".

friday night - whats everyone doing - [quote=HRNYCOUPLETK]Drinks games pool hottub bedroom fun :-) anyone have a pool or hottub :-) not just another night at a bar listening to drunks trying to sing lol. Swingers party at the bar however is always good. maybe BBQ with some drinks and a fire pit. Throwing ideas out there :-)[/quote] Wait didn't we meet you at that bar the other night? I was that really drunk guy that sang really well!

Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - [quote=NAUGHTYGIRL101][quote=HARD_STONE][quote=EDANY0178]DVP? [/quote] I'll take either opening that I'm allowed in. [img]http://www.swingular.com/photos/h/HARD_STONE%7B19832287654f28ccd1ec598%7D.jpg[/img] [/quote] Uummm...i think this is one topic that "just average" would be an advantage...at least for us less experienced girls lol... [/quote]That scared me to sexy LOL

Pineapple or upside down pineapple - - If they have a hottube they are 100% swingers.

Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - our 1988 325i M only one in america... only one of 5 in the world... my baby..this was its 2001 magazine photo in englands 'total bmw' magazine

why is it ! - - I think it's all or mostly about perspective, physical perspective. We get to see them having sex from a totally different angle. When we are involved we can't see the whole picture (or is that hole picture). We are also, caught up in the in the event as well. So when we see them in the throws of passion (since I'm such an illiterate schmuck, the word fucking would suffice) we have a different view and a different "perspective". If we are also, and at the sme time engaged with the guy's wife we may also get that little feeling of naughtiness added to the voyeuristic sense we experience. If we are truely swingers we have grown beyond the urge to pounce upon the other fellow since we conscienously, both husband and wife conscented and made the decission to have sex with others and placed jealousy in a trunk somewhere. So I really think it is a different perspective than we get when we have sex with them.

Male on male - Not sure if this is where this goes, but male on male tonight only. - [quote=NAUGHTYELFS][quote=CARRIERMAN][quote=MASSMN]I think part of the problem why guy's don't want to put it on the profile or try it is they may be afraid if their GUY friends would ever find out that might cause problems with their friends. Remember these site's can be accessed by anyone this is the same reason alot of swingers don't post a face photo. [/quote] AMEN!! But you'd be astonished at how many people here on Swingular just don't understand why some of us choose to NOT have a "public" profile pic.[/quote] true but then again if someone you know just casually finds your pic and profile it means they were on here looking for the same thing you were and have just as much explaining to do.[/quote] Unless they're just surfing, and stumble on it. I know - sounds like I'm paranoid, doesn't it? But I have an awful lot to lose.

Do your friends and family know about your lifestyle? - - Our very FIRST experience ever with this lifestyle was down in Vegas. We figured we were out and away from our home town, which mind you at the time, was a small small town where everyone new everyone, and everyone's business. Anyway, we went to Vegas for a night on the town and thought we might go to the Red Rooster and ck it out. I was extremely nervous anyhow because we had never done anything of the sort, and we didn't know what to expect when we went inside. We mustard up the nerve to go in, and went on upstairs to the couples lounge. Just as I was getting comfortable with being there I look up only to see a girl and her husband from none only then our own home town. She new all my family, and to make it worse she lived right by my husband's brother, and I worked at the same store she did just in different departments. I was mortified the whole night long.....I just kept thinking....OMG, here we are, never done this b4, 400 miles from home, at the Red Rooster, and we run into someone that we freaken know. What are the odds??!! The worst part of it, she has the LOUDEST mouth in the whole valley so I just knew she was gonna tell everyone she seen me there at a swingers club. lol Thats just our luck! Needless to say, we got home, I seen her at work, and she said nothing at all. Our family didn't find out, no one we knew found out, and from then on....I just really didn't care that much. Bsides, they were there too....so, I had something on them as well!