Monett Swingers in Missouri

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Staying a couple in the lifestyle - - We've been at the LS nearly our entire 15 year marriage.. and we've always done things as a couple. Even way back when we were newly hatched swingers, we've always done it as a couple, and we've used our real names from the beginning, mostly because we're not creative enough to come up with fake names. Neither of us would make good actors, because we'd never respond to anything but our real names either 🤣 We started this together with equal gusto with the idea of having fun together while having sex with other people at the same time, and with people we want to be friends with, and not exclusively in the bedroom either. Has it always worked out that way? No but that's okay. We've always still managed to have fun. Anything that we can experience with each other and share together has made it 100% worthwhile. The day we can't have fun doing this together is the day we go back to being sexually monogamous. Simple as that. But the REAL secret to why we're still happily married is that there is one thing we do separately, which may be problematic for some. It's scary sharing this, but here goes.... We don't share blankets. We can't do it. We've tried, and it doesn't work for us. We're both very needy in regards to tossing and turning and being wrapped in our own blankets. Plus, we've got our individual blanket needs that can't be met with exclusively with the same one.

Exclusive Couples - couples who are committed to another couple - Ok! You have heard from someone who is poly....ME. But we are still swingers and no one expects us to be exclusive either.... anymore than we expect them to remain true to us and us alone. Polyamorous is a conjunction of a Greek and a Latin word. Means to love more than one.....I don't fall in love with everyone that we have sex with but I do have 2 secondary relationships. One woman is separated and we met her in the lifestyle.. We love, yes WE love her as much as people can feel love. The other were seeing what swinging was about and came to a club that we attend. The lady and I started talking and then on line and we discovered that we loved each other. I stopped by their house and talked to her husband and we, that couple and us are great friends and she and I are lovers.... and everything is open and above board. Recently while I was in the hospital from a heart attack, they came to visit everyday. So poly really isn't about swinging at all but there are poly people in swinging who are looking for exclusive relationships... I let people know that I'm poly because if the lady and I hit it off...... I don't want any surprises... BUT I never go looking for that type of loving relationship in the swinging community, i.e., "the lifestyle" I think that some people use the word without a true understanding of what poly really is... Poly can involve sexual relationships but those are based on love not sexual recreation. My wife is not basically poly however, she loves that lady who is not attached as much as I do... so in a way she may be poly but does not wish to define herself that way. When talking about poly and swinging one has to make a distinction as to what people are looking for in a relationship. And, let's not kid ourselves...swinging and sex with people outside of your marriage or relationship is really a relationship aleit maybe a short lived one but one all the same. I'm just a person who can and does love more than one person. Like being hetro or BI or whatever..... that's just part of my make up.. I have chosen to be a swinger and if it lead to something I hope that I have let people know ahead of time and found out their feelings on that possibility... If they are not open to that but are sexually attracted, then we can keep it on that basis and I simply have to be aware. I think it can best be analoged to a couple or one of the partners in a couple being bi. They find a couple to play with but that couple are not bi or have no curiosity in that bent.... So they play and the bi part is never an issue because they discussed it beforehand and everybody was fine with the situation.... I belong to a poly group here in my state. the group is more a discussion group although they get together once a month and every mon or Fri to discuss poly issues. Most of the people who are in that group, over 300, will say that poly and swinging are two entirely separate issues and they are totally unrelated. There are a number of members, both single and couples, who are also listed on swinger sites....They are looking for sexual companionship and maybe, if it happens, loving relationships... So poly and swinging are not so exclusive nor does it mean that poly swingers are only looking for LTRs any more than bi women will only play with couples who have bi women in them.... Being poly of Bi ain't an issue...playing is... There may be some who are in the lifestyle to find lovers... Easy to find out and make a decission about....

WHY????? - - I thought this was a swingers website.

corvette - any one up for a group ride - [quote=KRAZYGIRL]Its not a Bow Tie but would love a reason to get these two sexy girls out and enjoy them. Let us know[em]Emo_85[/em] [/quote] Definitely doesn't have to be a bow tie. We have one of each in the garage, Dodge, Ford, & Chevy. Your Mustang is nice(so is the wife). Maybe we all should start a swingers car club. Haha

Help With Wife - Wife has fantasies but is super hesitant to experiment. - [quote=EVILDOERS]Personally I think you might be a little too eager (can't blame you, we all were when we started) and pushing just a little too hard to make her fantasy a reality. Rather than trying to find a way to get around the "Catch 22" of her fantasy maybe just explore it more verbally and see if it evolves into some kind of scenario that she is comfortable with that more easily can happen in the real world. The most successful swingers we know, ourselves included, arrived at where they are by being open and supportive of each other's fantasies and desires without forcing them in any way. In other words, be patient, explore your fantasies verbally and maybe role play, a LOT, with each other before you jump into anything that either of you isn't quite ready for. You might be surprised as you fantasize openly and honestly how your fantasies might evolve and become something that you eventually can and will make a reality. You know your wife better than anyone and maybe she does need a little nudge but most of the swingers we've known over the years who've crashed and burned did so because one partner pushed the limits too fast and didn't wait for the more hesitant partner to catch up. In our case we were quite surprised and what our fantasies morphed into when we really dug deep and talked about the truly deviant (by local standards anyway-lol) aspects of our fantasies. Sorry, I know that's probably not the kind of advice you were hoping for but it's been our observation over a rather lengthy swinging career. Another thought, if you're bound and determined to make your first swinging experience a MFM, is to find a guy who is okay with just watching you two play or maybe getting involved in some soft swinging...i.e. back rubs and or touching but no intercourse. We were soft swap for the first year or two of our swinging life and it was great fun and took the pressure off until we were ready to take the next step. Best of luck! edit- Sorry about what now seems like a long rambling response. In my defense it was pre-coffee. [em]Emo_79[/em] [/quote] Damnit! Evildoers is right again!

How to identify yourself as a Swinger - - FWIW we're on several other swing sites and one of them has an app for your smartphone that will alert you if you are close to another swinger (assuming they also have the app and it's enabled) and allows you to text them. Yeah, that one's pretty much been a bust as well even though it's actually a pretty good idea. People forget to turn it on (they usually don't leave it running when they're at work or home or at church just in case someone they really don't want to know they're a swinger somehow has the app) when they're actually in a vanilla situation where they wouldn't mind being approached. I don't know if the idea failed because people want privacy or because there really aren't that many swingers out there (despite all of our fantasies and "swingdar"). LOL

Taking the time... - - I have actually turned down invitations from VERY experienced swingers mindful and concerned about being fully able to play my part in accordance with what I imagine their standards might be and/or probably are. I would prefer, still, to play with less experienced people and learn the ropes, so to speak. One of my interests in pursuing this at all is to learn more about sexuality ... others' as well as my own.

Utah moms (Mormon) TikTok drama - - [quote=Gitterdone]I don't know who that person is but I do know that swingers will ways throw others under the bus. It's happened to me several times mostly to get with the female I was with. Men will tattle on each other in hopes that the female will leave and run to him which never did work. Nonetheless the attempt was there. They ways tell and swingers always talk. Yet this entire time I've kept so many secrets about others and never will reveal anything. Too bad no one else does. I've been around for a long time in the lifestyle especially when I was a couple. We knew about marriages breaking up. Two of who I know personally. Actually three now that I think about it. I'll never name anyone. All I ask is the same respect and keep it to yourself.[/quote] Unfortunately some people in the community get some thrill from outing others, gossip and causing chaos. That’s human nature, we suppose. Not been our thing. Guys have offered to take Mrs away and give her what they supposed she did not have. Gals have made the same offer to Mr. Again, not our thing. We’ve seen a few couples try the lifestyle as a way to “save” their relationship. If that’s what they need, it rarely works, there’s probably deeper issues at play than good playtime. We’ve had lots of fun, met really cool people, and learned so much. We’ve also had terrible (mostly comical and some tragic) times, met some creeps and assholes, and made more than a few mistakes. What consenting adults do amongst themselves is their own business. Outing others is not just bad form, but a major downer. But we’d be remiss if we didn’t admit to taking some amusement from watching them throw each other under the bus (more popcorn and a bigger bus, please!).

since when did swingular become a dating site?? - - Well if they both want to b swingers....that is a perfect match haha... But it dies seem odd if ur just looking for love to b on swingular..

Do your friends and family know about your lifestyle? - - Its funny that this post came out, I was swimming laps last night at the pool in town, and the lifeguard came up to me and started telling me how she heard there was a swingers community in Blackfoot, and how what a wild town its becoming.