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Friendship vs. spontaneity? - Are you here to make friends or just to fuck? - The perception of this lifestyle is that there is a whole lot of sex going on between everyone. Maybe if you are young slim and trim and willing to go to bed with everyone at the drop of a hat that is true. But that pretty much describes the young anyway. If that is your perception of all swingers, and you are here in Utah, then you are bound to be disappointed.
I think that this question comes up a lot because it is not a simple question for many of us and it seems to be posted by those seeking friends first. The end goal may be sex. But if that is your only goal then why do you say you are seeking friends. Friendships are not made in 30 seconds or a drink over at the pub. If that is what makes friendships in your mind then you are really just here for sex.
For us it is finding friends. Some folks that we meet we will play with and some we will be just friends with. It really boils down to a 4 way vote when it comes to the bedroom and maybe even being friends in the first place. And that is what makes finding friends and bedroom partners difficult. There is always the added fear of rejection that gets in the way when you want to anything anyone.
I look at all the complaints of one-nighters and couples that never speak again after sex. I can only surmise that for those folks sex is the only yard stick of friendship. You do not have to be sexually compatible to be friends.
We have found that if what you are looking for is friends, then it is easy to be part of the lifestyle. If what you are looking for is based on having sex then it is easy to be disappointed and difficult to be part of the lifestyle.
Furthermore we look at those that just want to screw and think how lonely their existence must be.
Know any Mormon swingers in SoCal? - Single girl in SoCal wants to know! - I will DRIVE down there and fuck the TESTIMONY out of her. Just sayin'...[em]Emo_62[/em]
Ok, maybe I'll fly. Too hot to drive.
Positive Media Attention - KUTV should have read this - A lot of metaphorical ink was spilled in recent weeks about how awful the KUTV piece on swingers is/was. Thought you all might all appreciate this Op-Ed in the news magazine The Week (one of the most prestigious mainstream news mags) ... sometimes the media does portray things in a positive light. Kudos to the Portland couple for their articulate defense of the lifestyle.
http://theweek.com/articles/583977/journey-from-stayathome-mom-sexual-adventuress
Swingers unnerve families at hotel - - HeHeHe! TAMMYNWALT....too funny about the Swingers Pride Day idea. We\'ll help carry the flag! Sounds almost like our post on another site. Nobody cares anymore about WDW Gay Days but some questionable naughty (not law breaking or nekid) Swingers at a party and the whole world goes apesh*t.
For heaven sakes keep those vanillas off of the beach they might see a thong or boobs! LOL! Geez! If they had broken any laws there would have been all kind of media chatter about the arrests.....hummmmm..... To each their own. We weren\'t at any NYE parties due to working taking care of idiots shooting each other and drunks. The shame of it all ( ;
Happy New Year!
:D
Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - Friday nights are lifestyle friendly. This Friday is Steampunk theme. Haven't seen tomorrow's password yet. Password just gets your cover waved. I think we'll be there tomorrow.
International Swingers Day - How are you celebrating? - My reply was in regards to Whiskey girls comment
How long did it take to convince ? - - We talked about the fantasy of being in the lifestyle together before we started it. As said before, fantasy and reality are two different things. We weren't ready for a date with another couple yet because we were afraid of expectations or problems arising from things that we hadn't thought about. So, we thought going to a swingers club might be a good way to learn about it. There are no expectations and we could ask advice from others.
But, we were so paranoid about running into someone we knew at a club here in Vegas, where we live. So, we decided to check out the possibilities out of state. lol. We went to Sea Mountain Inn in Palm Springs. It was the first time we were both completely nude in front of others. That was a great beginning as we quickly realized that no one was staring at us. We actually became very comfortable quickly. We did notice a lot of sexual activity. But again, that activity seemed normal to everyone there. We met a lot of great people who were willing to give us friendly advice. We commented how everyone seemed so normal. Even though we went with no expectations, we were given an opportunity to be with another couple, who had a nice "no Pressure" style. Privately, my wife and I discussed our boundaries or any other concerns. After we worked it all out, we agreed to play with the couple and loved it! Ten years later, we are so glad we joined the lifestyle.
So maybe, you should try coming to Vegas and go to a swingers club. Check out the scene, talk to some people, and form your own opinions. The club will be as tame or as wild as you want it to be.
Shit Swingers Say - Hilarious Video.. - [quote=RAW]We are going to change our profile to Bicycle! :)[/quote]
Hahaha! You totally should! ;)
Wannabes and net fakes - Will the real lifestyle members please stand up - Plenty of "real" swingers get labeled as fakes every day. Plenty of fake swingers, get mistaken for "real" ones just as often.
That phrase should not be subjective to whether or not someone stood you up, faked a profile, or used old pics, just to name a few negative things. Those people are simply assholes. Even if they fancy themselves swingers.
It has happened to us on many occassions that someone has claimed to have seen one of her pics either in a mag, or on a paid porn site, which automatically makes us "fakes". We have been labled as "fakes" based on the fact that we choose not to (primarily) meet with couples, thus we must be fake. We have been accused of being "fakes" because we are selective about with whom we meet, and even more selective about with whom we play. NO fakes here. Just smart people who know what we are looking for.
People who have an axe to grind are typically the first to call out "fakes" on sites like these. I may not have the benefit of 25 years of swinging to support that supposition, but it is what is obvious to me.
I am sure that there are a great many "fakes" out there who are only interested in wasting other peoples time with their bullshit, and believe me when I say that we have met one or two over the years...but I wouldnt automatically brand someone a "fake" based on the fact that they didnt show up for a meeting. (That is not to say that we would excuse that behavior, because if someone stands us up they had better be dead or we are done with them for good.) But who knows..maybe they just got cold feet? Maybe they really DID get a flat tire on the way to see you....shit happens.
Luvbugs! (mR.)
:p
Single male in this lifestyle.. - I have questions for couples and single females. - [quote=BMSHELL][quote]why is it that girls and couples look for girls more than guys?[/quote]
So you're asking why do swingers prefer MFF instead of MMF?
Because most women in the life-style are bi-sexual to varying degrees, and most men are not. Not even a little bit. Thus, MFF becomes the "third wheel" combination that most swinger couples can enjoy together. (Versus MMF, which is really more just about pleasing the female).
Why is is to hard for a single-male to find a couple to play with? Well, see above.. most couples don't want MMF... and those that DO want MMF have about 10,000 of you to choose from. Supply and demand.
This isn't that complex.
[/quote]
Yup. Tons more bi gals than bi guys. Probably 'cause, for just bunches of reasons, it's a lot more "acceptable" for a gal to like playing with gals than it is for guys to like playing with guys. And, as much as some of us see ourselves as rejecting society's "norms" and doing what we ourselves think is right, or acceptable, we still grew up in that society, had its standards pounded into us for years, and just can't truly get completely away from all of them. So more gals are likely to try it out and find out they like it. ~ Terry
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