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Swingers gone bad?? - - TR, concise, astute and very well said. I don't believe any of us living in glass houses are chucking rocks. I'd like to think that the majority of us would want our 14-15 year old kids to discover their sexuality in a healthy, natural way. Remember playing doctor in gradeschool w/other gradeschoolers (not their parents!)? Love me, not my kids (or I'll kill ya!).

Another Swingers Show on TV - - Channel 222 on Comcast?Xfinity 8pm this Sat.

Why the male side of Couples are here...? - I will admit I am hoping to spark some heated debate on this.... - (from Terry) And now I'm starting to understand why Evil and I seem to have senses of huimor that sometimes run in the same direction. It's because, in at least some pretty important ways, we see the world in the same way. I'm here for two reasons. First, I was doing this for a while back when it was one Hell of a lot harder than it is now for single men, they were very nearly completely excluded from the lifestyle which, then, was usually called, by both those inside and outside of it, "wife swapping". The very title, and the basic premise of things then, essentially disqualified single men. Now I'm talking about the late '70s and early '80s. Actual "hippiedom", and the free love philosophy was either diminishing, dying off, or dead, depending on where in the country you were. But we'd managed to change society's general view of some things, and sex was one of the biggest. The attitude change, especially on the part of women, who were no longer automatically "sluts" if they enjoyed sex and didn't need to be married, or engaged, or even "going steady" to indulge, together with effective and easily available birth control (illegal in every state until sometime in the early '60s, even condoms were ostensibly sold as and were labeled as being specifically for "disease prevention", and no worries about deadly and/or incurable STDs had changed the world, and birthed what is often referred to as a "sexual revolution". It was almost like falling off a log to go out on a weekend and find an amenable girl. So why the Hell was I bothering with the "wife swapping" world, when it was so damned difficult to even penetrate, let alone to "get something"? For the same reason I was one of those long-haired (except for my 3 years in the Army) hippie freak. I LOVE people who ignore what the rest of the world is telling them to do or not to do, and I want to be around them. Yeah, there are all sorts of individual exceptions, but, for the most part, as compared to the vanilla people, swingers are more intelligent, more likely to use their heads for something besides a hat rack, and, despite the various complaints about certain kinds of people or actions that pop up here, a Hell of a lot less judgmental and intolerant of people who aren't the same as they are. They, again as a general rule, think for themselves, and don't just latch on to the currently popular opinion about whatever. Why I'm here now is that I'm married to a girl 24 years younger than me, who happens to enjoy a couple things I can do but which I'm not really into, and she's at that so-called female sexual peak point in her life. And I figure that my main purpose in the world is to do everything I can to make her as happy as she can be. Being witches, we don't have the standard "you belong to me and only me" attitude about our life partners, we don't think sexual fun with some other person does a damned thing to diminish our relationship; if I have sex with Jane Doe or she has sex with John Smith (and maybe Jane Smith, too), we are still the same people afterwards that we were beforehand. So getting back into it, and bringing her into it, was a great way to help her have the kinds of fun she likes, and for me to hang around with a group of people that I really like. And meet and play with girls I really like. I'm one of those weird guys who does read the profiles before looking at the pics, and even once in a great while even send off an email before I've even seen any of the pics besides the main profile pic. It's just a lot more important who she is and what she's like than it is what she looks like. And I'll find lots more girls that I like and respect here than I ever could in the vanilla world. One thing about what Team said, though. Swinging can bring out and amplify problems in a relationship. But avoiding that is just a question of attitude. First, you have to absolutely trust in your partner's honesty with you. Even though the Mrs. has a hall pass, the only provision being that I meet any guy she might play with before she does, so I can feel like she's going to be safe with him, I know I'd be really upset if she ever started messing around with someone on the side without me even knowing it was going on. But In don't ever even worry about that actually happening, because I trust her completely. Just like she trusts me, not only to not start a secret "affair" with someone, but to never try to even influence who she does or doesn't play with. She knows that when I meet some potential playmate of hers, even if for some reason I think he's a total jerk, I'm not going to say anything. She's the one who will be playing with him, not me, so it's her job, not mine, to decide who's worth playing with. She knows the only time I'll have anything to say about whether she should or not is if I get an impression somehow that the guy can't be trusted to treat her well, and not ever hurt her, ever do or try to do anything she doesn't want. Point is, if you both don't totally trust each other, you're likely to have problems, even if neither of you ever actually does anything sneaky. The second thing is that you can't have the "normal" attitude about your partner, where you feel he or she is in a way your property, and if anyone else uses your property, you're being stolen from. You can't have that feeling that sex equates to love, the kind of love that makes someone want to permanently be with someone. else. If you feel that way, you'll end up worrying that having sex with another person might make him or her decide they've found a better companion, and leave you. Sex is something that goes with that permanent relationship kind of love, but it isn't what determines it. If you can't truly see, and feel, that sex itself is just another enjoyable activity that you do with people you like, just another form of friendship based intimacy like discussing some problem you have with a friend, you're probably going to have problems. If you're at all, in any way or for any reason, at all uncomfortable with your partner having sex with other people, or he or she is uncomfortable with you doing it, then you're probably going to run into difficulties. So it's all a matter of attitude. If you and your partner are truly completely fine with the other having sex with someone else, and if you both trust each other completely, swinging isn't going to destroy your relationship. If both of those attitude type things are not really and truly true for either of you, then it just might. And about that 70 years old thing, Hell, I'm only 6 years away from it, and I haven't yet run into any indications of decline. So far, the girls I've ended up in the bedroom with have been happy with the results. While I haven't yet (thank the Goddess), had to just rely on that ages old bit of wisdom, the one that says "when you're too old to cut the mustard, you can always lick the jar", it ain't everyone that can tie a cherry stem in a knot with his tongue, and I suppose that might be helping me out, but, then again, that always helps out, no matter how young you are [em]Emo_4[/em] But just in case that needing to be taken care of bit is one of those things that happens all of a sudden, like maybe it hits you at one minute past midnight on your 70th birthday, I think I better get Evil to hook me up with those friends of his, so we can have that room all arranged for and booked. Only Evil's limiting himself. I want 3 if those insatiable 22 year olds, one redhead, one blonde, and one brunette. When I commit suicide, I want it to be a truly memorable event, even though I won't be around to remember it. [em]Emo_45[/em] I mean, we can set up cameras and stuff in there, then my wife can get it all edited into a good porn flick, and the proceeds can help her out, in case we haven't managed to find her a nice sugar daddy by then.

We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - No drama here, drop us a line;) ~T&D~

Rooftop Resort - - We have been to Haulover a number of times. Swingers have their meetup areas near one of the life towers on the beach. But as mentioned there is not a swinger vibe there but all varieties of nudists. We have not done rooftop because of the mostly marginal reviews.

Female sex fantasies. - What do women really think about sex? - [quote=EVILDOERS] We may have to agree to disagree here. We've been in the lifestyle for almost 3 decades and have talked to countless people (yes, many of them even women-haha) who have talked openly about the fantasies they have and have had and sometimes, sadly, how often those fantasies were stifled to some degree or another by societal expectations and repression as well as suppressed by how they were raised by their parents (especially their mothers..."Good girls don't do/say/think things like that."). [/quote] This is just anecdotal and you are failing to realize that you are talking to them in a LS scenario where everyone wants to be the super open and cool movie star-like swingers. Same reason all SM's in the LS are respectful, kind and the Good Lord's gift to couples seeking MFM or even the ones that are not. We all play The Imitation Game. They will talk to you openly, honestly, will tell you how much they enjoy it, how healthy for their relationship is. It almost becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. But, unless you were raised in a far away land where the LS was a norm and that we all know it has never existed, these confessions are an integral part of the illusion. And, if you take all that at face value, you are lying to yourself and even worst, believing it. [quote=EVILDOERS] It seems more than just a little condescending and even a little bit misogynistic.[/quote] I've been called worst lol. It's just biology, we think we are this almighty superior species, key to the universe, chosen to be sovereigns of all when all we are is just mammals with an unusually large brain victims of our own imagination and gullibility for the most part. And yes, imagination is sometimes good, that's how we got to the moon. But that's also why when you go to an Indian casino, you only see pictures last dozen big winners from last year but you don't see the thousands of losers of this week. Most of us are trapped in a dream and think we can make our own reality. "What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun." -Ecclesiastes 1:9

Why do most cpls in the age range of 25-40 get so hung up on ag - - we love meeting new friends in the life style . but we dont want to play with everybody we meet . we go to alot of parties and hang out with a lot of different levels and ages of swingers . we dont rule one out more then the other for any reason . do we going looking for bigger people ???? or older people ???? no . but we really dont go looking for anyone . we enjoy our friends and try to make new ones .and we look and see each person for who they are and how they act . i am looking for friends to hang out with . and then i PICK MY PLAYMATES OUT OF THAT GROUP . the ones i click with and feel turned on i will play as much as i want to . do i rush faster to go up and say hi to a younger and in shape couple . hell yes . but i will also pull the oldest person in the club up on the dance floor and have a blast !!! i enjoy hanging out with older swingers . but alot of people that have been in the life style for along time are more in a rush and looking for fun . i love the new bies best . they are new and fresh and so creative and more into teashing and flirting WHICH IS MY BIGGEST TURN ON . but i also love to flirt and just make people happy . last party i asked an older woman to be my parnter in a contest . at a huge club with about 400 people . she was very shy cause all the other girls where DANCER LOOK ALIKES ... ( I DONT LIKE THE BARBIE LOOK ALIKE TYPE ) PERFECT ISNT MY CUP OF TEA . but i was teasing this older woman and i got to her lift her skirt and let me spank her ass . and she was spanking mine . and then she had to do a dance by herself . and i gave her a hug and spanked her ass and told her to go shake that hot ass and make them all scream . she did her best and she had a blast . she told me thanks so much for making her feel so alive and wild . and that made me so turned on and happy . and i love hanging out with people who are creative and fun . i look at peoples pics and see what their style is .i read their profiles and see how much they open up and what they have to say . yes i do look on the outside a bit to be with someone . but i also judge them by them for the real them . and what they like and dont like . and how they treat others and each other . iam so turned on by a few older couple that we know . one couple we did some things that we have never done before cause they wanted it like that we love to get wild , and take pics and make movies . i love body paints . i am turned on by people who are into what we are . young or old .black or white , married or single . alot of people talk about all the popel that dont like them cause they are older or not in perfect shape . but i also dont play with the hard bodies and try to look and act all perfect .that is a huge turn off to me . the ladies that all go to the club and they all look alike . blonde hair , tats int eh same place s , same cute matching outfits ,same size tits . and they think thats all their is about them . i cant stand that shit , people ask me why am i hanging out with the older ones and not chasing the pole dancer . i like to see people for who they are . and see the bad with the good and still like it . and want it . some people turn u on and some dont . if u are at a place where most people dont then u are hanging out with the wrong crowd . always be around fun people that u click with . and sometimes things that are bothering people about themselves can show . or just be in your head that is the reason . there could be other reasons about u that someone isnt turned on by . we hang out with alot of people . but play with only a few good friends . and thats what we are looking for . and we wont play with anyone that is just look ing for a play mates . so the best advise i can think of is ... to find a cool fun group that u can have a blast with and find what u want and need and dont worry about the ones that u dont click with for whatever reason . no biggie . have fun with the ones that do like u . thats what matters . naguhty dreams freaky kitty

How do you spot a Swinger..?! - tell tell signs of the lifestyle - [quote=CHRKE2]The mention of "Hedo" strikes me as fairly good 'code'. [/quote]Funny you should mention that. Not sure that would work so well: we went to Hedo 2 and were surprised by how many vanilla's there were there. After a few days, we took to breaking the ice by asking if they "were on any lifestyle sites?" or if they "had their profile posted anywhere as a couple". Being that we were at Hedo, we were obviously not afraid of offending anyone (it is Hedo after all!), but it quickly let us know what their status was. Even still, the couples we ended up hanging out the most with were non-swingers. C&M P.S. Oh, and then we had my college friend who, when we told we were going to Jamaica, asked if we were going to "that Hedo3". 90% sure he is vanilla.

LAVA - - [quote=1EZ2]The 20 & 21 is the big swingers party![/quote] Do you have more info on the party? We are interested in going

This lifestyle - What are we really? - Great thought out comments to this posting ThoughtGarden, and we have to agree with you 100%. We love (but don't ever think that would be romantically- LOL), and miss you guys. A good topic to discuss. As for us, we count ourselves as "Fantasyers" that have things we want to experience and do so with the people that we enjoy (and or love) spending time with. Swingers (hard core) may be at one end on one leg, and Poly may be at the other end and on another leg, but we like being at the "Y" and in the middle, whatever that is labeled. :p