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How did you get started? - - Oh boy... I get to tell this story a lot but it never gets dull... lol
How we came to be....
First you have to understand how we met...
I had been a widow for about 8 years, during which I began to get curious about ways to fulfill my own fantasies... being tied up, blindfolded and used by several diferrent people at one time just didn't sound very likely under normal dating circumstances. So, I began to surf the web for subjects relating to my desires and came across a few swinging sites... Instantly I became interested in learning more about swinging. I placed a few ads on web sites and waited to see what would happen. I began getting lots of replies and quickly learned that THIS lifestyle was for me. after a few years I gave up because i was just too nervous to go out and meet these people alone.
After a few years I was dating a normal guy and we were invited to a party together. At the party I was introduced to some friends of his (who were swingers, but I was not informed of this). They were very nice people and we became friends right away. The following weekend I threw a small dinner party at my house and invited them. The guy i was dating was not at this party due to his work schedule. The party eventually ended up in the hottub and soon we were all naked. Well, to make a long story short, they hit on me all night long! I kept brushing them off because the man I was dating was NOT into that sort of lifestyle. They took it very well and we remained good friends. A few weeks after my party, there was a party being thrown in the their honor at a local pub and we were invited to attend. We went to the party and had a great time. My date however, had to leave the party fairly early (another conflict with his job) and I decided to stay at the party for a while longer. That's when I noticed a VERY handsome but VERY young looking guy sitting across the room that seemed to be staring at me. He didn't look a day over 20 to me (a 10 year diference in our ages at least) so I began to wonder if my tag was sticking out or if I had frosting on my nose, or what! So I ran to the bathroom quickly to check. When I came back out my friends (the swinger couple) were standing next to my table WITH the handsome guy. I walked up and was quickly informed that this GORGEOUS man who had been staring at me was their son, Ryan. We were introduced and hit it off right away. We sat together all night long talking about everything. To make another long story short, within 2 weeks I had broken up with the guy i was dating and Ryan was moving in with me. 2 weeks after that we were engaged.
After several months and a lot of great times we were out on the boat one weekend at a place called passage key. This is a place where 50-100 boats anchor in 3' of water and wander around from boat to boat all day partying. We were sitting in the cockpit eating our lunch when we noticed a couple wandering our way. They came up to the boat and introduced themselves and we began talking and hanging out with them. After several bloody marys we all ended up in our cabin playing! I had never mentioned ever being in the lifestyle to Ryan before because I didn't think he would like it! But that night on the boat went very well! We had a blast! We woke up the next morning and Ryan asked me "What the hell do you call what we just did???" It was so cute. I told him that's what they call swinging and he then told me that he thought his parents were into that... that's when i got to tell him the story about his parents and the spa party i had... we both had quite a laugh!! Since then we began placing ads online and going to a few clubs and have been having a great time... I am soooo glad I found him. Now both our fantasies are quickly becoming reality! ;)
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Aint he so cute ladies?
Dinner party - - We would love to attend a classy party so tired of the stand around slamming drinks with people type party. I think the wife and I would be more inclined to enjoy a touch of class and I know from there things could become more and as for fun oh HELL yes!!!! Again anymore the lifestyle has become a fuck fest and that is a major turn off for most. Sorry the pressure to play is become a game of who can fuck who, rather than lets meet people for long term friendships who enjoy the benefits of possible play. I'd love to dress up and meet people for a few drinks in a classy social setting verse the meat market so if you're planning on setting one up include us and let's kill the myth that all swingers just want a trash fuck.
Help With Wife - Wife has fantasies but is super hesitant to experiment. - [quote=EVILDOERS]Personally I think you might be a little too eager (can't blame you, we all were when we started) and pushing just a little too hard to make her fantasy a reality. Rather than trying to find a way to get around the "Catch 22" of her fantasy maybe just explore it more verbally and see if it evolves into some kind of scenario that she is comfortable with that more easily can happen in the real world.
The most successful swingers we know, ourselves included, arrived at where they are by being open and supportive of each other's fantasies and desires without forcing them in any way. In other words, be patient, explore your fantasies verbally and maybe role play, a LOT, with each other before you jump into anything that either of you isn't quite ready for.
You might be surprised as you fantasize openly and honestly how your fantasies might evolve and become something that you eventually can and will make a reality. You know your wife better than anyone and maybe she does need a little nudge but most of the swingers we've known over the years who've crashed and burned did so because one partner pushed the limits too fast and didn't wait for the more hesitant partner to catch up. In our case we were quite surprised and what our fantasies morphed into when we really dug deep and talked about the truly deviant (by local standards anyway-lol) aspects of our fantasies.
Sorry, I know that's probably not the kind of advice you were hoping for but it's been our observation over a rather lengthy swinging career. Another thought, if you're bound and determined to make your first swinging experience a MFM, is to find a guy who is okay with just watching you two play or maybe getting involved in some soft swinging...i.e. back rubs and or touching but no intercourse. We were soft swap for the first year or two of our swinging life and it was great fun and took the pressure off until we were ready to take the next step. Best of luck!
edit- Sorry about what now seems like a long rambling response. In my defense it was pre-coffee. [em]Emo_79[/em] [/quote]
damn EVIL, I have read most of your responses and there are alot of smart ass comments. this however was not. This helps me and the MRS alot. thank you... BTW love the smart ass comments also..
Preconceived Ideas - - Wow, great subject! My preconceptions of swingers were very similar to Big D's. Wild orgys, naked bodies everywhere....ohhhhh sounds pretty hot ....LOL
But at the time for me it was scary. At our first party, within a hour I was begging my hubby to take me home I was terrified of being "attacked"
Ok, now I kinda like that.
Seriously, we have met some of the greatest friends EVER. Friends that you can depend on when you need them.
Fun friends to hang out with who aren't shocked if you show a little skin, or a lot of skin. People who totally understand the double meaning to lots of subjects, friends who see you turn your head and watch the couple who just passed you on the street and know EXACTLY what was just going through your mind!
Gotta love it!
Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - Done it a couple of times and loved it, anyone wants to get together during the day and try it let me know, also have a buddy that wants to try it for the first time, so any of you ladies who would like to play let me know.
N by N Campout - Thanks for a Great time! - This was our first time coming to the campout. We had an amazing time and cant wait till next year. Thanks to our hosts and all the people who showed up and made it a great experience. "this one time, at swingers camp" haha!
Mormon Swingers - - Are you Mormon?
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - Posted By: TPAFUNLUVNCPL2 Reply posted on:
Jan 8, 2008 - 6:10 am
I would like to point out one thing, when you are a single male you and you are straight and you want a couple then you bring nothing to table. You have nothing to offer the husband of the couple aside from a show but you are asking the man of the couple to share his wife with you with nothing more then a thank you in exchange,
in most cases single men have a gf or wife but simply do not want to risk sharing them because they are afraid of losing them, having them leave or know thats what you want to start doing or will be trying to do or they do not want to take the effort and risk and time to get their partner involved.
Maybe that is it. They are seen as takers but not givers. Also the acts of some of their kind is seen as rude and pushy. Say "No Single Males" in the profile but yet they cannot understand that. Maybe that is why they are all lumped into a bad group. No positives, for most people and a few negatives and you have a bad listing.
I don't think so. People have talked about the "risk" factor time and time again. However, what is to say that the partner won't run even if you don't "risk" them?
An Open Letter to Administration - What's the Mission? - I hate to say it but there are more people from the state of missouri on here then in utah... and florida makes up almost as much as missouri... us swingers are everywhere on here...
If you don't like what is in the forum why don;t you post up something of your own and let it fly!
Females squirting - - "People like you do not belong here"???... Are you kidding me...the guy asked to see pics of a certain format...the last few request were granted..3-somes pics, kissing, couples etc etc..the only difference this time is that it was requested by a single male and THAT is why the guy doesnt belong here?...Like I said before, this is not a good site for singles at all..It seems the owners of this site wanted this to be a full swingers site with different categories but there are some members that are trying to change it to a COUPLES only site....I suggest the single male like myself find a couple on here that can post their request to avoid all the fighting and what not..there's enough fighting going on in Iraq as it is...do we really need it here????
Big J.
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