Early Swingers in Iowa

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Single guys and emails... - Answering all emails - except from single men who don't seem to read our profile - OK here's another post from another "Narwhal" (single male vs. "unicorn" single female) Valance I think you coined the moniker in another post and hope it sticks because it's comparative nature of desirability even with a 10 ft. pole. I really don't understand couples attempt for the exclussion of single males as not being"swingers" without also excluding the single females as swingers with statments like "stay out of the clubs, your not swingers"or" get a woman first" This is a lifestyle not an exclusive club and there are all types and interests. I admit there are many rude crude and impolite males out there but there are also the same in the couples and single women catagories too. What are my odds of finding a woman into and interested in similar sexual activities in a regular bar or dating site? I'm here mainly for the social aspect(and yes maybe sex!). My reasoning being if one can be open and honest about sex they can and usually are more honest about all other things and this has been a general experience with most of the people I have met. Yes there's sometimes drama .(90% of the time it's either insecurity or honesty related and you'll see me headed the other way..lol) but for the most part I have found all of you folks to be great to be around. I don't ever expect any replies to any email contcts I initiate or receive any initial contact,the good old days of letters of introduction and subsequent curtious replies are regretfuly long gone. The internet just makes it easier to ignore or not acknowledge someone. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone replied without fearing nasty rebukes for rejection issues? The single males are just looking for their needs and desires to be fulfilled just like all of you and don't deserve to be bashed for being single. Being rude, vulgar,overly aggressive or impolite is a different matter. All in all I say have fun and play nice no mater what your preferences are.

closed doors? - - It seems as if the doors are closed to a couple with little or no experience. Why is that? My wife and I have been posting ads on various swing sites for a while now and haven't been lucky enough to find a nice couple or single female to hook up with. Is it that swingers don't want to "waste their time" breaking in newbies or what? We've chatted with a single female who blew us off and a couple of couples who have done the same. We would just love to find a couple or single female who we can actually hook up with. How are you supposed to "enjoy the lifestyle" when the lifestyle won't enjoy you?

How did you get started? - - Oh boy... I get to tell this story a lot but it never gets dull... lol How we came to be.... First you have to understand how we met... I had been a widow for about 8 years, during which I began to get curious about ways to fulfill my own fantasies... being tied up, blindfolded and used by several diferrent people at one time just didn't sound very likely under normal dating circumstances. So, I began to surf the web for subjects relating to my desires and came across a few swinging sites... Instantly I became interested in learning more about swinging. I placed a few ads on web sites and waited to see what would happen. I began getting lots of replies and quickly learned that THIS lifestyle was for me. after a few years I gave up because i was just too nervous to go out and meet these people alone. After a few years I was dating a normal guy and we were invited to a party together. At the party I was introduced to some friends of his (who were swingers, but I was not informed of this). They were very nice people and we became friends right away. The following weekend I threw a small dinner party at my house and invited them. The guy i was dating was not at this party due to his work schedule. The party eventually ended up in the hottub and soon we were all naked. Well, to make a long story short, they hit on me all night long! I kept brushing them off because the man I was dating was NOT into that sort of lifestyle. They took it very well and we remained good friends. A few weeks after my party, there was a party being thrown in the their honor at a local pub and we were invited to attend. We went to the party and had a great time. My date however, had to leave the party fairly early (another conflict with his job) and I decided to stay at the party for a while longer. That's when I noticed a VERY handsome but VERY young looking guy sitting across the room that seemed to be staring at me. He didn't look a day over 20 to me (a 10 year diference in our ages at least) so I began to wonder if my tag was sticking out or if I had frosting on my nose, or what! So I ran to the bathroom quickly to check. When I came back out my friends (the swinger couple) were standing next to my table WITH the handsome guy. I walked up and was quickly informed that this GORGEOUS man who had been staring at me was their son, Ryan. We were introduced and hit it off right away. We sat together all night long talking about everything. To make another long story short, within 2 weeks I had broken up with the guy i was dating and Ryan was moving in with me. 2 weeks after that we were engaged. After several months and a lot of great times we were out on the boat one weekend at a place called passage key. This is a place where 50-100 boats anchor in 3' of water and wander around from boat to boat all day partying. We were sitting in the cockpit eating our lunch when we noticed a couple wandering our way. They came up to the boat and introduced themselves and we began talking and hanging out with them. After several bloody marys we all ended up in our cabin playing! I had never mentioned ever being in the lifestyle to Ryan before because I didn't think he would like it! But that night on the boat went very well! We had a blast! We woke up the next morning and Ryan asked me "What the hell do you call what we just did???" It was so cute. I told him that's what they call swinging and he then told me that he thought his parents were into that... that's when i got to tell him the story about his parents and the spa party i had... we both had quite a laugh!! Since then we began placing ads online and going to a few clubs and have been having a great time... I am soooo glad I found him. Now both our fantasies are quickly becoming reality! ;) --------------------------------------------------V Aint he so cute ladies?

Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - Maybe the more appropriate question is "Why so much hate for single males in the swinger's world". One of the issues could be that they are seen as diners who bring nothing to the table. Yes, you might say there is something for the lady so all is good. However, the issue is "What do they bring to the table that the host wants?". If the husband is being left out, do you think he is going to be happy? Once or twice, maybe. If many times he will not be happy and she will not be either. Yes, some couples are looking for single males only because of some reason or other. Many are wanting it to be an all way experience. For us, the risk of the baggage outweighs the potential gains. Why? Because the few times we tried it, we had a bad time. So, what is our incentive to go ahead and try again and again? Well, you could say that there might be a bunch of good single guys just around the corner if we just tried again. Fair enough. However, since we both are not really interested in single men or single women, the gains would be slight, if any. For a couple that is not interested in a single male, what is their benefit? Probably little, if any. So, how would you go about enticing them? Probably going to be a hard sell. Little to gain and the potential for a problem. Add that to the fact that they see the single guy who is in abundance, brings nothing they care for and you have the nuisance factor. Now, with us, a couple could also be problems. However, we are more tempted to risk it because of the rewards it could bring. more importantly, the rewards it could bring THAT WE WANT. With the single male, the rewards would be something we don't really care for so the risk of a problem is a negative. I don't care for a BMW. I'm a Mercedes man. You might say that both are made in Germany and quality vehicles, etc, etc. However, I might be willing to pay $40K for a Mercedes while a BMW of the same value might be worth only $30K to me. Or if my dad had nothing but trouble with BMWs and when I was young, so did I, it might be worth $5K to me.

LS vacation - looking for suggestions - We posted this the other day in another forum but thought it might help you out... If you ever get a chance to do the Young Swingers Week at Hedo (especially in March) do it! In March they take over the entire resort and limit the guests in age and only couples...no single dudes. One member of the couple has to be 45 or under. The people that go are amazing! We made friends all over the US and Canada and have places to stay if we are travelling. Just spent Halloween in Denver with a couple we met at YSW at Hedo. They have theme nights every night, play rooms, top shelf alcohol, good (not great) food, day time activities (including free daily scuba trips if you are certified), four or five on resort restaurants (as well as the buffet), no tipping allowed and a lot more. We like spending our days layng on the beach or partying in the nude pool where you have hundreds of fully naked people around you all the time. The resort has a mandatory nude side and a clothing optional side. The resort is designed for swingers instead of just being lifestyle friendly especially when YSW takes over. It is truly an amazing experience that we highly recommend trying at least once...and once you have been, you will go back. We can not recommend it outside of YSW weeks because we have heard there can be lurking single men.

LAVA - - The 20 & 21 is the big swingers party!

Orlando on the 21st - - I don\'t mean to be negative or difficult, but the general \"lay of the land\" for swingers in Orlando - has been discussed here before - with the conclusion that aside from Tastebuds (which is wonderful, but meets each *Saturday* night - not on Friday when you\'ll be there) - there really isn\'t much in the way of \"public\" entertainment. You can enjoy Rachel\'s Steakhouse (near the airport) for some great steak and topless dancers, or your best chance is to see if you can hook up with a private party - or *make* a private party somewhere - because Orlando is desperately trying to keep the \"Family\" image - and clamps down hard on anything \"public\" for swingers - or even just good-old nudity in strip clubs and such. It is ironic that Vegas has the same problem: in the city of Vegas - one cannot be *nude* in public shows. Particularly funny because when the Swingers and the Soccer kids clashed at the hotel near the airport recently, one person said \"Orlando isn\'t VEGAS, for goodness sake\" (meaning that MCO is supposed to be MUCH more wholesome - whatever that means). Anyway, not in any way shooting at you - just kind of sad that a big, tourist city like Orlando - hasn\'t managed more \"action\". It may be there, but it\'s \"underground\".

What is your fantasy for 2008? - Many have made resolutions for 2008, but some of us may have made a resolution to fullfill a fantasy. What's yours? - Happy New Year everyone! May 2008 be filled with fantasies fullfilled and desires satisfied. Ours would be to find a couple who have the desire to do an "actual" full swap. Me (male) with their fem for a night, day, or whatever of conversation, flirting, eye play, and erotic touching leading up to making passionate love to each other and the same for the other halves of both couples. It seems that most "open-minded" swingers are threatened by this idea. I know that some of you will say, " but we like watching each other." We do too, but think this experience would be hot. Anyone out there????

New Swingers Club in Utah - Gauging interest in new club - We would definitely come keep us posted

Expect more news reports like this one. - - What bullshit. They didn't once mention the fact that most swingers also routinely abuse their pet stuffed ferrets and burp loudly in public restaurants. The part about all swing parties being giant free-for-all barebacking masses of wet hot sex was pretty spot on, however. I'm just glad they didn't mention the wearing of metallic neon thong Speedos and dozens of gold chains cause that would totally "out" most of us swinger guys. Interesting they didn't once mention bisexuality. Of course we all know talk show hosts and relationship "experts" are raging carpet lickers. Evil