New Burnside Swingers in Illinois

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Age quesiton - Do swingers of the same age group swing together? - We tend to meet couples closer to our age. Since we are in our early 50's - when we hear from a young (20-30 years old) couple it's 99% fantasy on his part to be with an older woman which doesn't do much for the other two people involved.

Slowing Things Down - An argument for taking your time. - That's a lot.... did ya'll cramp up typing this? Whew ! On the topic, we are always friends first... it makes the actual play much better ( in our own humble opinion ) [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]A nice, slow, buildup might be ideal. In the vanilla world, the buildup often begins long before the first date. You meet a co-worker, or a fellow student, or someone who you see at the coffee shop, and there is some immediate attraction, and eventually you connect on a more physical level. If we are hoping to make those sort of connections, within the swinging lifestyle community, then we are going to have to find a way to run into lifestyle people frequently, and casually. If there is no, or limited opportunities to just run into swingers, enough to build relationships like that, then the way we end up meeting is through dating. If you are swiping right and you are vanilla dating, online, if there is shared chemistry and attraction, you will have a second date and so on and so forth. If the chemistry is super hot, even in the vanilla world, people sometimes fuck on the first date. If the sexual intimacy was superb, that might just accelerate the depth of the shared communications, the amount, and the quality of the time together. The way we see it, if there is some super hot chemistry, on a swinging date, if sexual intimacy happens, the same sort of acceleration in the relationship might happen. It might not. If it doesn't and the sex was good, well, good sex beats mowing the lawn. For us, we raised five kids, who all grew up to be happy, healthy successful adults. All but one of our kids have significant others. Some have kids, which makes us grandparents. Our kids and our grandkids, really like us, love us, and we really like and love them, so we spend a lot of time together. We have friends from work and friends from the neighborhood, and we have jobs. Seriously, dating, at the level we dated, when we were wooing each other, in terms of time, well we just don't have it. If non-monogamy was the openly celebrated norm, and friends openly fucked each other, as a normal part of a friendship, then we would all just naturally end up in those sorts of relationships. Well, except the assholes. Assholes don't flow into meaningful relationships. They take advantage of people's vulnerabilities and loneliness. Manipulation isn't friendship. Demanding people, who wish to break you into the vision of their expectations don't want to be your friend. No give, just take. You'll never be able to give them enough. You owe them nothing, and yet, they will shame you for not giving them exactly what they want when they want it. If we can all just avoid the assholes, then what we do get to share with good caring people, is a privilege and for lack of a better term, a blessing. Good people, reaching out, accept and defend each other's vulnerabilities, even if that means some disappointment and patience, and that takes an honest caring person. Sexual desire honestly expressed is surrounded with vulnerability, and romance even more. I changed subjects there for a moment. Since what swingers do is considered taboo, as a social norm, then that leaves dating. Let's face it. Dating is hit and miss, when it comes to making a lasting connection. When four people are involved dating becomes maybe a bit more complicated. We are not apposed to the slow burn buildup. If we meet someone and there is a spark, that is the motivation. If there really is a nice shared spark, and they want to jump ahead and build the fire, we probably won't say no. [/quote]

Weeding through the real/ fakes - I wish there was a "validation " on profiles.. - PolyCouple, I think you're pointing to a cultural gap that we've also been frustrated with for years. We fall more into the independently open category, which puts us closer to the poly-lite and kink communities than the swinger community. We've found that a lot of swingers have the men negotiate the process and that's a huge turn off for us so we end up considering it a red flag in terms of what we're looking for. No judgement, it just clearly wouldn't work with our dynamic. We're free to talk to and do whatever we want with whomever we want. And we do. It's just different. But, in general, only hearing from the man does also make it hard to figure out if you're talking to a real couple or if there's true enthusiastic consent involved on all sides. Especially with so much catfishing going on over on other apps. Maybe the site could have badges or tags that filter searches.

Real Swingers Sex Parties In Pocatello? You Bet! - Idaho Sex Club is holding it's Spring Sex Party in Pocatello - Saturday, March 26th! - Hello all you horny swingers! Idaho Sex Club will be holding another fun Swingers Sex Party! Spring is a great time to get naked and naughty! [b]When:[/b] Saturday, March 26th, 2011 [b]Where:[/b] Pocatello area hotel (exact hotel and directions available on ISC site) [b]Time:[/b] 9PM until we are done! [b][color=#561225"]This party is NOT a Meet-n-Greet[/color][/b]. There will be on-premises sex happening! All of our parties are private events and by invite only. If you are interested in learning more about attending this party (or others), please contact jessicat78 here on Swingular.

Cruise - pricing - You guys are really bitching about paying $2000 for two people for a 7 day lifestyle takeover cruise? I heard Utah people were cheap but come on. Let's break that down per day... $285... per couple... per day... We've been many places that aren't nearly as nice as being on a cruise with 2100 swingers and paid a lot more than that for just hotel rooms. Throw in car rental and food and you're out even more. So what if you're paying $600 more than what they charge for a regular cruise... you don't have to worry about children and you're around people you can actually have fun with. Sounds like the extra money is worth it to me. And have you ever been on ANY vacation when you fly? Add in airfare, liquor, tips and gratuities as well. You're not getting those things free on most other vacations anyways. Did you go to SwingFest? The rooms there were $300 a night! So if you can't afford this cruise, don't knock the people who put it together, we've been waiting for something like this for a long time and they deserve to make a bit of money off this because I'm sure it wasn't easy. And you're probably the ones who bitch about there never being any events or parties for lifestylers, then when someone puts one together, you bitch about it because they make a dollar for their efforts. We'll be on the cruise and we'll be glad to see those who aren't cheap on there with us.

Disabled Swingers - - [quote=LPF_69]My best friend was disabled, and while up until the last month of her life she was not confined to needing mobility assistance, she was active in the lifestyle and very upfront with people about her disability. She was always a BBW, struggling with issues from severe depression and diabetes, her weight fluctuated up and down as a side effect of various medications and changes in medications to manage her primary illness, that being bipolar disorder. Sometimes she had zero sex drive as a side effect of some of the medications for her depression, and sometimes she wanted sex 24/7 (Manic side of the bipolar disorder). She always told anyone that contacted her about her illness from the first contact/reply and would leave it up to them if there was ever to be an in person meeting knowing that she may or may not be able to play. We were friends for over 8 years, and while we were active in the lifestyle as a couple for 2 years we always let others know there was a possibility of the other one of us being around (especially when she was having bad times from her mental illness). She always had a good time when she was able to play, and we met a lot of really good people. So just hang in there, be honest and confident. You will meet people that are willing to play with you once they understand your situation and limitations, and you will have some wonderful times. Larry[/quote] i totally understand where she's coming from with the side effect of the meds. although she shouldn't be having the manic stages unless she goes off the meds. i know how tough those ups and downs can be though. i'm sure some people around here saw me at a few parties and thought i was nuts and/or a very terrible person. i never bothered to explain it to anybody. now i'm medicated properly and it can have its effects as well, but thankfully the new meds don't effect me sexually at this point.

Female sex fantasies. - What do women really think about sex? - I was just going thru a few e-books that I've had on my device for quite a while and never quite got around to reading. One of them is the infamous "My Secret Garden" written, I believe, in the '70's by Nancy Friday and purportedly a compilation of common female sex fantasies and possibly how they may have originated in the female mind. I haven't finished the book yet as it's a little bit ponderous with a fair amount of what I think may be outdated psychobabble, but I was wondering if anyone, especially some of the ladies here, have read this book (or any other similar one) and what they thought of it. Alternatively, perhaps some of the women here could share some of their most common sex fantasies...maybe even the ones that they really don't ever want to act out IRL. PS- I realize that since this is a swing site that some or all of the things female swingers think about could be outside of the norm, somewhat, compared to women who aren't in the lifestyle and haven't had the opportunity to actually act out some of their fantasies.

Young Swingers Night - - We just bought our tickets and are looking forward to meeting some new young couples. Anyone else already bought tickets and planning on attending? The RSVP list looks exciting!

Where on Earth are all the hot Virginia Swingers? - Show us what you have to offer VA!!! - newport news here...

Racist Cops In The South - Trooper uses racial slur and threatens to kill a fleeing man. - DANDJLIKETOPLAY, That's my whole point. Why does it matter? I honestly do not get it. I opened this discussion with the intention of connecting with fellow libertines. I want to know why we, as swingers, can be so progressive when it comes to our sex lives and the liberty that we require to fullfill them. Yet, we are blissfully ignorant to basic humanity. I feel ashamed to be a human sometimes. The fact that some of the most intelligent people in the world are being stifled because of the melanin in their skin, baffles me. The sun seperates us. THE SUN! Ironically, it is the same sun that gave birth to many religions of the world. It even gave birth to Judaeo-Christianity. If you want to watch a great movie that will enlighten you to some little known facts; I suggest you watch a great flick called Zeitgeist. http://www.zeitgeistmovie.com If you have about two hours, this movie is filled with interesting facts and some speculation as to our future and theories regarding our world, conjured from some of these facts. Please watch it with an open mind and also a grain of salt. It changed my perspective a little after watching it. Anyway, let me know what you think. -D-