Graton Swingers in California

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Why is being a YOUNG SINGLE MALE so difficult enter the swinging - Just a good random converstation starter :-) - See if i want to get laid... I do not need a swingers site to do it. I am here for the fact to get myself in the swingers lifestyle. Who knows maybe meet a girl who is possibly able to liberate me from the single male status :p . I just always had a fantasie about a orgy / swingers party.

Single Males - Question - As aggravating as it sometimes is, we don't do the block single males option because one of the first swingers we ever had contact with was, and still is, a single guy. On another site we were on we blocked single guys and never heard from our friend, even though we sent him messages from time to time. We finally got an email at our regular mail telling us he couldn't respond to our messages because we had blocked not just the cold messages from unknown guys, but even replies to our own messages. So, if you ever decide to contact that single guy that catches your eye, make sure you unblock or you will never get a reply.

what the f#%@ was he thinking? - swingers still deserve respect - We get those too, it ruins it for all those nice single men that really are respectful. When men like that IM us, we dont even give them a second thought, most of the time the feed off of the attention whether it is negative or posistive they really dont care as long as they get a response! My advice is just to simply ignore them, block them, do what you can to just not give them what they want! It is to bad that some people think that just cuz you are in this Lifestyle it means you will give it to anyone, at anytime and it simiply doesnt mean that at all........so we like sex more then most but it doesnt mean we are sluts, we still want respected. Good Luck!

The males of couples I need your help!! - I am trying to understand my husband and male pride.But been that I am not a male this is hard.So please help. - First: We were childhood sweethearts. (At the age of 12.) We are best friends. We have been together for 10 years,been married for 8 years.For the ten years we have only be with each other.Before we were togrther I had been with 5 men (I do mean men.When I was a teen,I went out with men : 18 to 23.) Before we were togrther he had been with 7 girls.I was with one woman and Chris was there but we had to stop before we got started.(she only when down on me and Chris was watshing but then I told him to go down on her,so he did.Then we had to stop because someone was try to come in the room.We were at a house party.This is why we are here. Second: We are in the same place regarding swinging.I only want to be with another woman.I do not want to be with another man.(We both are not ready to have another man with us.)I just thought it would be easyer to fine a couple to do what we want.Then to find a single female.Because every where I go everyone is saying the samething " There are not as many single females looking for coupls as there is couples looking for single females."Please reread the post.It saids that We want to be with a single bi-female..... I only want the women to play and the men to watch...... Third: Nothing can get in the way of our marraige.We would never leave each other.We have been through too much together.At 18 we got back together and we had our frist miscarrage.At 19 we had our frist son and our son and I almost die and we had our second miscarrage and was told by a DR. that I could not have any more children.For 4 year we had sex maybe once a month because it hart to have sex.(When we had sex it was over real fast because he did not want to hurt me.)He never steped out on me.He never thought to step out on me.at 23 we had our second son.What ever was wrong with me was gone because it did not hart to have sex any more.At 25 we had our daughter and I almost die having her.For the past 2 years we have wild sex almost every night.After having kids we finely got our sex life back.Now if only I can get my body back. LOL <(That is a joke Chris loves my body) Chris is the best man out there for me.I should know because I have been looking for a husband since I was 16.All the men I went out with only cared about themselves and what they could get.Chis cares about me and trys to give me everything I want.THAT IS WHY WE ARE HERE.Because he is trying to give me what I want.He is the type of person that would give you the would if he could. Just so you know we as a couple have researched the swingers lifstyle for a year before we as a couple decieded to join the swingers lifestyle. We wrote this together.I just typed it . Candy & Chris

Can you be in love AND swing? If so, tell us how! - - I guess I will make a much stronger response. The lifecoach is full of shit! My wife and I are both on second marriage and the previous ones fell apart because of cheating. It wasn't the sex it was the lies, the betrayal of trust. My wife and I love each other like crazy. Swinging is a recreational activity we could do without if we no longer like it. Even during swinging I am only sharing my wife's body, her heart belongs only to me and vise versa. We didn't get into swinging to FIX anything. We got into it because we wanted to add to what is already great for us. It was not a replacement for something missing. our premise is making friends and if we have sex fine and if not we have a friend to do things with. Also if anything swinging made me love my wife even more. Her love and trust for me cannot be affected even by me having sex with others. We have a couple of times swung (if that is the word) separately and she came back to tell me about it and did so with my knowledge that is what she was doing. And of course vise versa. We still trust each other and love each other. Plus while swinging I can see other men, or women, pleasing her and get a view of what she looks like from a different point of view than I have when making love to her. As others have said, as long as you communicate, don't take things too personal, and maintain trust swinging will be fun and not hurt your relationship. When I say don't take it personal I mean like one poster said you should be able to say "she give good head" or she is talented. LOL we had been with a guy in a threesome and the guy did something that I have never done and made the wife Cum really fast and hard. When she had recovered she blurt out without thinking "You have GOT to learn how to do that!!!!!" It kind caught us both off guard but we laugh about it now. She didn't say "I love him more" She said "DAMN he has a technigue that send me through the roof!" I have learned from the guy how to do it and have used the technique several times. Even if I can't duplicate it so what? She still LOVES what I do to her too. More importantly we still LOVE each other totally. OK OK I willget off the soapbox. It just ticks me off that people who are supposed to be great at teaching relationships most of the time have relationships that suck yet they can tell you how to do it. BULL. Save the money for the LifeCoach and take a trip with a plane full of swingers and go to HEdonism III. It would be money better spent. LOL I will quit now.

Are you still interested! - Dynamics amoung swingers - Two comments I am going to try to keep short. First.. there are the couples we see somewhat regularly, we enjoy the more intimate moments with them, but we need to take a break every so often and just be friends. We are glad they understand that. When we are ready to get back into the bedsheets with them, its much more meaningful and fun. We respect them when they feel the need to become vertical friends for a while and not horizontal. So its not always a loss of interest, just a temporary change of scenery or personal events in our life... (Then again, some people do have issues that change their attitude towards lifestyles altogether.. and you have to respect their needs when they become just vanilla). Second. Old topic, but similar in nature to this string. Whatever happened to plain old honesty? Its a frustrating experiences to chat over a period of time, feel a friendship is developing, finally meet and spend a great eveing together... talk about getting together again soon only to be continually stood up or given a rash of excuses. I think everyone understands that finding a good match with another couple comes with several disappointments. Its so much easier to accept when you are told straight out that its not going to work out, rather than being lead on and on with the premise that there is something developing. Common courtesy goes along way and commands respect. Even after a relationship that may have developed for extended periods of time, why not be truthful and let the other party know when the interest is dying or gone? Or when its just a social relationship you are comfortable with.. why not be honest? There are some great friendships that can be made here that dont require sex. It happens to all of us.. think about how you want to be treated when you are on the recieving end. HUGS... Cyn, (and him)

Those damn single men! - Where do they fit in this lifestyle? - T4Real I dont see Sexypoker hating anyone. He has said that from his experiences, be it at a club, private party, and I'm sure out in public, that men hit on his wife, and dont take NO for an answer. I have no doubt you have had play partners who you've been out with, and even with you standing right there, the idiots are still hitting on her, and dont want to take No for an answer. It happens in *straight, gay, lesbian, and swingers* clubs. I know several swing couples who prefer to hunt for play partners in the *straight* clubs. There is a huge gallery of men to choose from, most willing to play even if hubby wants to watch. We are all here because we LOVE sex, and we want multi partners.

How to get Girl on GIRL...solo??? - trying to find that elusive, no drama, chick - I'll chime-in reiterating what other have said. First, the reason these single females disappear, never meeting you is because they are horny guys playing online games and looking at pictures to get-off. Second, we agree with Thoughtgarden 100%. EVERY FMF we've had came from the most unexpected place when we weren't even looking at the moment. These are women we met at non-swinger parties, night clubs, etc. I think this is because for the most part, unlike single guys, single women are not actively pursuing threesomes and moresomes. Single women are not creating the number of profiles on swingers sites like single men. If they happen, great. If they don't, that's okay too. It's now that they aren't interested, they're just not out there pursuing it on a daily basis. A couple of suggestions: 1) Look everywhere. Remember when you used to go out to clubs by yourself or with a friend when you were single and you'd meet someone? Same thing, except now you're doing it as a couple. Instead of boy picking-up girl, or girl picking-up guy, it's now couple picking-up girl. You are BOTH dating her, not just one of you. 2) Couples is a good place to start, even if you are not interested in full swap right now. Going to the meet and greets and getting to know people and them getting to know you helps. You may find a couple that is okay with playing solo and would love to fulfill your fantasy with wifey playing with you two. But, if you don't get out there and get known to people you'll never find them. Good luck! And keep trying. We were in the lifestyle as a full swap couple for quite a while before our first FMF, and it literally came-out of thin air when we were least expecting it.

Close minded swinger "Open" Lifestyle...... - - Posted By: ULUVBIGBLKDICK Posted on: Jan 19, 2006 - 8:36 am -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Whites only swingers?? Death to all single males?? and now NO NAKED MEN ON CAM CHAT?? (only if your married and single females which is encouraged) How close minded is this swingers world becoming or has it been this way all along?? Your thoughts. AND YOU CALL US RACIST I THINK YOU ARE A BIG ONE I THINK THERE ARE ONLY SO MANY CAM WINDOWS THAT YOU CAN CAM ON HERE.I tried to get on cam one day and there where like 6 guys on and the rest where couples on not one offer to give it up. i think its called swingers NOT swinger Kristylynn

Why are there prostitutes on Swingular? - - [quote=ANONYMOUS]I do marketing for a living if anyone wants to hire me. ;)[/quote] I was referring to the prostitute being a smart business person for using a swingers web site. Because as everyone has pointed out. WAYYYYY TOO MANY SINGLE MEN and not enough single women.