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Mormons - - What a interesting topic, I have to put in my two cents. I am from Amesfoort, Holland. I moved to Utah when I was young and grew up in SLC in the winter, returning to Holland some summers. (A unique perspective) Now with my wife, I have not meet any LDS swingers. But our circle of friends is not LDS ether. But while I was single I meet many Mormon girls that a great interest in me. Some tried to convert me (HAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH.... no) and some had no intention of converting me, although may have used it as an excuse to talk to me. There are many benifiets for staying in the church, and growing up non-lds can be a lonely affair in Utah. I think that many pretend to believe, because they need the support of the community, friends, and family. But many do want they want behind closed door. And I am sure the Internet is a great escape for them as well. I have been far and wide in this world, and most people are all the same. Yeah they may not be that open but everyone has to get to their own freedom in their own way and own time. So many of them just chat, and disappear when it comes down to meeting. But in my single days I had girls from the church meet me in private, and well. :) I used to like to think that is was because I was a hottie. but I think I have come to realize it was them who was hot, and needed release, and trusted me to be quiet about it. I am sure many think about swinging. But I doubt many would even talk to their spouse about that. The one issue I have with the Church is that they tend to control through fear, and I bet many guys and girls would like to bring up the topic. But fear their spouse will freak and they will be in front of the bishop. Most be a scary place to be, I am very lucky to have been raised in a very liberal, open, agnostic home. That upbringing seems to leave so many insecurity's, and doubts about ones self. anyway sorry to be long winded.

Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - The first step in fixing something is to recognize that it's a problem. -D-

Adulter or Swinger? - - Loving to dance at clubs and bars, Cyn and I frequently go out on weekends and are often met by a variety of friends. Over the years, we have accumulated a number of single females that enjoy dancing with us. One of these lovely gals enjoyed meeting attractive single men and would often end up spending the night with them. Not too long ago, somehow it was brought to her attention that Cyn and I were..... "swingers". She was furious with us and expressed her dissapproval in very clear terms. After she was through venting her feelings about how disguisting it was that we could possibley be involved in committing adultry, I took a moment to present to her a few select questions. First, she saw no wrong in spending an evening with another man in sex and carnal expressions of emotion? She responded that they were consenting adults and both single.. therefore committing no wrong to anyone. I asked if she felt it was wrong not to be monogamous with just one of these men rather than continually finding new friends to experience. Again, she responded she felt no wrong with what she was doing. Why then I asked, did she find fault with what Cyn and I were doing, as consenting adults and with full knowledge of what each was doing? She responded with the comment that "swinging" was just wrong and that as husband and wife we needed to be faithful to each other. So, I asked why it wasnt wrong for her to swing but it was for us. She retorted she WAS NOT a swinger. To that, I shared the following with her... according to every dictionary I can find, a swinger is defined as a person who engages in promiscuous sex, an adulter is a married person who has voluntary sex with another person to whom they are not lawfully married to. The realization of the fact that she was practicing swinging came as a shock. It took a few days to fully sink in, but when it finally did, she accepted us with open arms for what we are, (I guess adulters), and our friendship resumed. One very important item here to consider, too often the request to bring another single individual into our bedroom is presented with the excuse that the partner doesnt like sex anymore. The solution to their problem is to cheat... or in their mind... go swinging. In our book, these people are not swingers by definition, but cheaters. Its wrong and unfair to try to use the cloak of swinging to justify being unfaithful. Lifestyles and swinging is not a remedy to solve trouble at home. Often when we decline the request to involve people in our sexual activities for the reason their spouse is not aware or doesnt approve, we hear the rebuttle.."why not? you are swingers arent you?". What ever name we give it, people need to remember... this lifestyle is all based on a few key components. Trust, respect, and the terms YES and NO. Period. Cant we keep the labels, the slander, and the lies out of what we can find to be a productive, social, and even in many cases educational activity between honest, consenting, respectable adults?

Has anyone else had or still have this problem? - Mixed emotions when it's your turn to play - [quote=UCANTOUCHMYMONKY]Sugarandspice said "most swingers are down on single men. So many males are here for their own pleasure period. It is the God

Are swingers moral? - Who determines what morals are? - ...that all depends on who you ask! If you feel good about who you are, how you live your life, how you treat others... then yes, you are a moral being (if you weren't you'd feel it)... xoxo, a very moral CandeeMe ;)

single males - - Thank you for opening the topic. I hope that it will be used shed some insight and not just complain. In a place like Habits there are vanilla singles that have no clue that swingers congregate there. So there will naturally be more problem in that environment than a private party. At a house party the only people that should be there are those that are invited by the host and hostess. Every one of the guests should have known the rules or etiquette of this lifestyle. If you had complaints, they should have been addressed last night with the hosts. Evidently the balance you were looking for was not there. Sadly it is difficult for most singles to figure out how to talk to a swinging couple. There are no schools or training centers to teach this. As a single male, conversation at a vanilla party with a couple is much easier. Most often the men and women separate and we talk with one or the other without expectations on either side. Sometimes conversation is just conversation. I find that making friends is generally more difficult in this lifestyle because of the sexual expectations of many. I think that you will find a number of the single men, after getting the cold shoulder from many husbands, find it easier to attempt to talk to the women because they lack the skills to talk with both. It is a mistake but it is also part of the learning process. There is no excuse for rude behavior on the part of the single male but neither is there an excuse for the typical married male attitude. Single males are always and have always been a pariah and dam few couples want them at any party. I came into this lifestyle as a single male looking to make male friends to hang with that would help me understand the rules. I found most of the males were cold and suspicious and difficult to talk with. I was not looking for women to play with nearly as much as I was looking for a girlfriend that was already in the lifestyle. But I am sure that as far as most were concerned all I wanted to find was their wife

Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - Posted By: TEQUILAROSE Reply posted on: Jan 8, 2008 - 1:02 pm AKLIM, Saying pitbulls are a dangerous breed would be as inaccurate as saying all mexicans are illegal and are on welfare, all blacks like fried chicken and listen to rap music or all whites live in a trailer park and fuck their sister. There are dangerous Pitbulls, just as there are dangerous German Shepards and Golden Retrievers. It does not make it right to assume all are just because some are. Pitbulls are not the "most dangerous" breed by nature. The have a higher risk of attack, because many people mistreat them because of how they fight. Mis/Disinformation, ignorance and insecurity is what perpetuates intolerance Again, you are right. However, there are those that will cite raw statistics to JUSTIFY their opinion instead of trying to FORM an opinion.

Happy hairless people - Opinions please - The waxing is much easier and it does stay smooth for about 6 weeks once you do it a couple of times and the more you do the less the pain and it is not realy that painful anyway. Brazillian is the way of the future no iritation no razor burn the only thing is with guys we tend to get a few more ingrown hairs but man it is so clean and smooth. just make sure if you are a guy you have a pro or you can get hurt. We live on the east coast and among swingers and nudist from TN to Florida I think the % is very high.

Bitchfest here...... - - Having been in this lifestyle for quite some time, I've seen more than my share of drama. I think the most common misconception is that everyone is on the same mindset. This is not the case for most. You would think that going to a meet and greet set up on a Swinger's site would be a license to "Act" like swingers to anyone you recognize from the site in a public setting. However, I've learned quickly that because everyone responds differently, it is best to assume nothing and take nothing for granted and put on your thickest skin and expect drama. If nothing happens, and you make a connection with some one or both, then build from there and have fun. I have more fun when I go with no expectations and have them wildly exceeded, than to go full on and have the evening ruined through taking drama filled responses personal. However, I don't think that because some people may have jealousies, that they have the right to treat people rudely. I think there are many who can work on this a bit more and realize that we are all in this to have some fun.

Disabled Swingers - - Too bad you are so far away. Would not be a problem to us. We would only need to know the situation and limitations ahead of time. We chose when we began that cleanliness and personality would be the things that would limit us. Everyone has a right to enjoy life and the lifestyle. We have only encountered one man who wore a brace. He was great in bed. Ralph and Fae