Ahwahnee Swingers in California

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Question of the day - Lets talk about men lasting - What makes me last a long time? Soft Swap. Making out for hours isn't a problem. I never orgasm while playing uvula hockey. Grab-ass doesn't get me off either. Nothing makes me last longer than a good round of Utah County style dead end levi-lovin. Fuck, I bet I could last for 3 days as long as the energy drinks keep flowing. Line up ladies, I'm stamina man (soft swap style). You may not get off, and neither will I.... but we can tell our religious friends that we are swingers, and that's what it is all about, right?

Swinger Literature? - magazine articles, books, web articles... - One book that cums to mind instantly is "THE ETHICAL SLUT" And if you're lookin for fiction.. Sci Fi.. "Time Enough for Love" and another is "Stranger in A Strange Land" both by Robert A. Heinlein Not exactly about swinging but more about the lifestyle of either Polyamourous or Swingers in a fashion....The Ethical slut is kind of the grandfather of swinging handbooks and how to pull it off.. The other two are quite good about polyandrous/polygamous/polygynous relationships.. Could be fun to discuss, particularly the merrits and or negatives as it relates to the book/s and how it might relate to relationships in today's world, i.e., swinging...

Is this one of your rules? What is it? is it fear? or something - Does everyone feel this way? - For the record, we're fuck first, friends later types. We didn't become swingers to make new friends. We could have joined the Rotary Club for that. LOL Frankly, we like our non-swinging life. We became swingers to add a few special "others" to our already great sex life. It was about fulfilling some group fantasies and the wife's bi-curiousness that did it for us. It's a LOT more serious for us to decide to be friends with someone than it is for us to decide whether or not to fuck them. It takes a LOT longer than deciding "do 'em/don't do 'em" does. With that said, we HAVE made a few great friends from swinging that we wouldn't have met otherwise and wouldn't trade for the world. And that fact that we are good friends AND swingers makes these relationships really cool. But we have found that most folks don't actually "get real" until after the first sex anyway. Before that, everyone is guarded and on their best behavior. We're too old and wise to choose our friends based on first impressions.

We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - Well the first and biggest thing i can see is communication, especially between the couples before they play. I dont know why its so hard to ask your partner whether it be a girl or guy if this is ok and if not just let them know. Your partner needs to know you are here together to expand your experiences and for them, not so you can be selfish and have it all for yourself. I dont know why someone would put themselves in a situation they know from the get-go that they are gunna get jealous about. I mean your not stupid you know if your a jealous person either talk with your partner about it or dont do it. I think the stupid male ego comes into play alot hence why you see it being us guys that start the drama. Ow is he bigger than me, ow is he better than me, ow is she gunna be thinking of him when we have sex, I mean get over yourself!!!! I saw a topic in one of the forums here bout dick size and couldnt believe how many guys are worried bout it. Personally I could care less my woman is with me cause she loves me, its a mutual agreement that we are in this lifestyle not a onesided decision. I am sorry that you had the bad experience but dont blame yourself and roll with it not all of us are like that. As someone already said body language is a HUGE tell tale sign.

Are you a Swinger or Liver? - - [quote=JULESVERNE]Would "Ethical Non Monogamy" sound better to you. What we are talking about here is leaving the external societal rules behind and doing what we feel good with, sometimes that means we set our own rules. I'm sure that you have your own rules too, of one sort or anther. The Reason we Swingers have rules is that we enter this lifestyle with our own needs and wants and the needs and wants of our mates. We need to balance both while rejecting the conventional norm. Our sex life is like something out of an erotic novel that most people can't imagine is real, but we love it, rules and all.[/quote] What they said. Swingers allow many people, singles and couples to play as they choose with that those that want to swing, play or whatever they agree on.

The elusive unicorn.... - Any such creatures here? How many couples have caught one? - [quote=MANDIEQT]Married here with a single female profile. When I swing, I always do so as a single. I've run into several women who do something similar to me or as shared above, who swing with known couples and friends their partners have approved. There certainly are truly single female swingers on here but my experience has been they don't stay single or around terribly long. Some advice....I've participated in quite a few FFM swinging experiences and the very first thing I look for is being treated as an individual, not just a walking vagina serving up your fantasies. Unicorn hunting can be pretty toxic for the extra F, which burns most of us out quickly. This isn't meant to sound harsh just a reminder to not lose sight of the real people involved and how much that can enhance the experience. Personally, I don't respond to people who don't read the profile, don't treat me as a person rather than a fantsy fullfiller or who want the quick, easy, goodbye focused hookup. I like to enjoy the human(s) I'm with as it enhances the sex for me. OP.. what does incorporate a unicorn into your lives look like? If it's more polyamorous focused, any advice you get from swinging will probably not serve you super well. I have some resources I can share that are more poly unicorn focused if you'd like. Otherwise, I wish you good fortune in your search.[/quote] Thank you for stating this. This is exactly why I hate the term unicorn, I understand the meaning, but it dehumanizes the female. Respect is always important.

What sets you apart from other swingers - Lets see whos looking for what. - Uhhh....we're horny, LOVE to have fun and we LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE sex ;) Maybe later when I'm in a less smartassed mood I'll answer this more politically correct :D

Females squirting - - "People like you do not belong here"???... Are you kidding me...the guy asked to see pics of a certain format...the last few request were granted..3-somes pics, kissing, couples etc etc..the only difference this time is that it was requested by a single male and THAT is why the guy doesnt belong here?...Like I said before, this is not a good site for singles at all..It seems the owners of this site wanted this to be a full swingers site with different categories but there are some members that are trying to change it to a COUPLES only site....I suggest the single male like myself find a couple on here that can post their request to avoid all the fighting and what not..there's enough fighting going on in Iraq as it is...do we really need it here???? Big J.

Know any Mormon swingers in SoCal? - Single girl in SoCal wants to know! - [quote=NASTY4U2]Too bad we're not LDS. Because of our lack of religious beliefs, we have no moral nor family values.[/quote] Now this is funny. Well said

Thank you Lifestyle. - A commentary about our journey - Thanksgiving just passed us by and Xmas and the New Year are quickly approaching. I thought I would take a long moment of my time, and your time if you are reading this, to tell this massive entity, called the "Lifestyle" how it has changed me this year. We have been in the Lifestyle for a little over a year and a half. We don't even like the name lifestyle. We prefer "kinky" or "adventurous" or even just "fun as hell", but it seems the term will be around for awhile longer. The wife and I often ponder what exactly the Lifestyle is. Is it a certain set of rules and guidelines that we all live in? Is it the same for us as it is for everyone else? How often does it hurt marriage or relationships and how often does it help? Do we regret our decision to enter into it? When we first tip-toed into the waters we were intimidated, in awe and totally unprepared for what we would experience. It all seemed magical and sometimes scary. We have and had a great marriage and thought we wanted a new, kinky adventure together. We planned to go slow and we would be fine, we were certain. But we were nervous. We were so sloshed at our first Sinful party that we irritated a few people there, no doubt, and probably made asses of ourselves. We still do that sometimes, but now we do it conscientiously. But we grew and learned quickly and have morphed into what we are today (huge asses). Interestingly enough, a few years before we entered the LS, we thought swingers were all gross, dirty, sexually infected people ( I am still not ruling some of you out). We had met a couple that harassed us at every opportunity and were the "creepy" type. Now we know people may think of us the same way if they found out, which is sad, because we like to be honest and open with all of our friends. So, like many of you, it is a secret we keep. It is a trade off for doing what we do. So what have I learned? How have I changed? I have always been a non-judgmental person by most standards, but still I had strong opinions about certain things. One spouse, one partner; that is how it should be done. So what changed? First off, our communication started to blossom about all sorts of things once my wife left her religion. I won't mention names, but it begins with an L and ends in DS. We talked and talked and talked and the more we talked the more we realized that we both had kinky minds and that maybe we should "experiment". So, we made some rules, actually a LOT of rules, and entered the ring. Still thinking one spouse, one partner, but maybe, just maybe we could play in the same room as other people. How kinky is that? Hence our name...sameroomonly. Well, as some of you know, the lifestyle is a monstrous, living, breathing beast and can quickly drag you to places you never thought possible. We made some mistakes, had some great times and just fumbled our way through for a few months trying to figure out where our lines were and what we should or shouldn't do. Then we got smart. We learned to communicate again, like we used to do privately, only now we could do it with other people around. And it was refreshing. No more secret code words (well, sometimes) and no more wondering if what one of us was doing was not condoned by the other. So that is the first thing I think the LS has helped us with. Communication. We communicate like mother fuckers. Better than all of our non-lifestyle friends, for the most part. Are we always amazing and never have bumps? Of course not. Anyone who says they never have drama are either liars or delusional. So thank you lifestyle for our ability to exchange ideas and to be more honest with each other, always. The next thing we found was that we were making friends at a very fast pace. We made a kik group and had our first party with about 40 people up in Park City only 5 or so months after joining the website. It was a blast. We still host parties and invite new people all the time. We enjoy introducing new friends with old friends. Wait, did I say friends or fuck buddies? Don't we sleep with all of our friends? Isn't that the expectation? Not for us. We have made friends that we know will be around until we are all old and gray. We have lost friends because we wouldn't fuck. There are whole discussions on these forums about how some just want to meet and fuck, because this is a swinging site, not a friend site. And to each their own. We don't judge, but for us the rewards of our friendships have far outweighed the 10 or 20 seconds of amazing sex. We have friends around the world that we never would have met without the LS. So to the lifestyle, I say thank you for all of the wonderful friends we have made. Love you all, some more than others ( you know who I am talking about). :) The LS has also taught me to be less judgmental and to avoid using words like "never" or "always". Life is full of gray areas and has lost much of its black and white features. Oh sure, I still judge, have preferences and prejudices, but we all do. I just really believe in walking in another's shoes before I make any decisions about someone's life. So lifestyle, thank you for making me more understanding of other people. Last of all, I just want to say that the sexual journey has been amazing. We have shared many hot, sexy and intimate times with some of you and we have come to realize how similar we all are. We all like sex, we all have a kinky side, or else we wouldn't be here. I have done things that I never imagined would ever happen, with some of the sexiest, most beautiful people I have ever met. I have shared intimate moments with people I care deeply about and others that were just passing through. All have their high points. I have experienced more than most people would even dream about, as have most of you. We are the select who choose to follow our dreams and fantasies. I think we are fortunate. So lifestyle, thank you for all the amazing sex. In the end the lifestyle is different for everyone. It is a whole sub universe in the middle of a "normal" society. Sometimes we have to walk among the shadows to keep our secret, but totally worth it. I would never trade the LS for my wonderful marriage and think I am the luckiest man alive to be married to my beautiful, amazing wife who has shared this journey with me. Love you, Babe. As with everything in life, there will be people who read this and like it, some who don't care and some who disagree or will want to pick it to pieces. That is what makes this amazing. There are so many wonderful, different people and the lifestyle is a perfect diving board to jump into the sea of waiting bodies and personalities. So if you are new, jump in, explore and learn. If you are old school, help others to weather the bumps and keep exploring. Long live the lifestyle. That is a little about my journey, how about you? I encourage anyone to add what they think or feel the LS has done for them, even negative things. Merry xmas to everyone and hope to meet some of you new people. And to my friends, I care about each and every one of you. The Mr.