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Lack of Communication - Is it really that hard? - I've been thinking about this thread (and other's like it...they seem to come along every few months or so, along with the ones about whether or not condoms are a good idea or whether we're just caving to the big latex conglomerates) and I have a few additional thoughts.
First, many (most?) emails we receive seem to have about as much thought put into them as one might put into which side of their hamburger to start eating on. If they aren't spammed out to multiple people the senders, at very least, don't seem to have the verbal capacity to write anything beyond, "We seen yer add and wanna put our naughty bits in yer naughty bits." [SIC] Is it that hard to include a little tidbit or two about WHY you think we might be a good match for you and why we would want to take time out of our busy lives to meet with you? And the few that DO contain more than a generic greeting or poorly thought out pick up line have obviously not read our profile (don't necessarily blame them...takes a minimum of a couple of hours to slog through) and don't know what we are and are not looking for. For Christ's sake, give us at least ONE compelling reason why you think we'd like to meet you such as, "We love fisting out stuffed ferrets too and also worship Satan as our lord and master. Let's have coffee."
Second, when did we all become such Tender Heart Care Bears? And why do we necessarily feel entitled to a response to a more often than not spammed out email from people wanting to perv our locked pics? I've only written back to that nice Nigerian prince like ten or fifteen times before I finally got tired of him asking for my checking account number. Do you call back every carpet cleaning company that leaves a message on your voice mail? Do you send a nice polite note back the the guy who's running for president for the Violent Tyrannical Dictator Party and wants you to donate to his campaign fund? I mean, he was even nice enough to send you a self addressed stamped envelope.
So maybe put a little thought into your solicitations. Give people a compelling reason to write you back beyond, "OMG, you're swingers? We're swingers too. We should totally fuck!". This goes double for single guys. Read the profile...even if you have to do it over two or three nights and use a dictionary to look up the big words. Take note of what people are and aren't looking for and especially if they mention your particular demographic. And last but not least, Don't worry about it if someone doesn't write you back. For all you know they've just survived a horrific bumper car accident at Lagoon or maybe they're 2 days in to binge watching all nine seasons of Matlock and haven't eaten or slept for two days. If you're consistently not getting any responses to your emails maybe you're fishin' in the wrong pond. Take a good long hard look in the mirror and ask yourself honestly if Angelina Jolie REALLY would like to fuck you or if you're more likely to hit it off with Steve Buscemi or Nick Nolte.
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Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - I take none of this seriously man. This is just a means for me to express myself at the time I happen to be writing.
-D-
Age - New to the swingers community - is age a factor in how a couple is viewed? - Attraction is just that... attraction. Age is just one of many factors that has the ability to blow my skirt up :) I think society gets a little hung up on it. I was out and about recently with a much younger guy and the looks I got ranged from amused to downright pissed off. I was actually a bit shocked that people even cared.
My issue with seeing much younger men is that their range of experience is limited. Now I'm not just talking sexually, but life experiences. So when you crawl out from under the sheets, what do you have to talk about? That is an issue. I enjoy conversation, debate and people who actually 'get it', yanno? In bed.. well they are typically sexual dynamos..woo hoo!
Older men...well they have their issues too. I find that a few have had difficulty with relationship/play/dating/romance stuff. Their heads are stuck in good girl/bad girl issues and so I either get treated like a total slut/whore or a princess. It's strange. Skill level here can be amazing and while they typically don't have the dynamo factor, they have stamina and MAD skills... woo hoo!
Women are great at any age. I find I always have something to talk about with them. Sexually speaking... well, women speak a very similar language and most are sexually intuitive. Even those that have limited bi experience... woo hoo!
That about covers everyone... LoL... :) Happy play to you all!
Te
weight approperate - - We have been in the lifestyle together for 10 years now and couples not being up front about just wanting to play with the wife alone has always been a problem with us. We let people know upfront we only play together.
Now on the weight subject...We advertise ourselves unashamedly about being a BBW/BHM couple. We also let people know if its Ken and Barbie they want they need to move on down to the next profile. We have played with HWP couples as well as with Big Beautiful Couples like ourselves. The HWP couples we have played with in the past have been amazed at our level of inhibition and sensuality. In short it was an eye opener for them...Big people can be very sexual.
One thing we have noticed is that lifestyle web sites, magazines and clubs seem to perpetuate the Barbie and Ken mystique. How often on a swinger web site have you seen a BBW, BHM of even a BBC on their front page? The same goes for magazines and advertising for clubs and lifestyle conventions and events. Even here on Swingular we have yet to see even a featured member that is a person or couple of size. In our humble opionion it's something swingers media needs to address.
Our whole take on the topic is this...If your mind is so closed that you can not see beyond exteriors then its your loss.
We started a Yahoo group called Big Beautiful Couples and Ladies a couple years ago with the idea that if membership grew large enough maybe organizing an event similar to Lifestyles or Hedonism II. Though the membership is small we still have the passion for the idea of a convention with Big Beautiful People as the primary attendees. We are still checking to see if there is a similar group here on Swingular and if not we'll be getting it rocking and rolling.
If we want people in the lifestyle to be more accepting of size (both women & men) we have to learn to be our own best advocates.
Have an erotic day
Howie & Susie
Disneyland swingers - - We just got back from Disneyland. too bad.
Cuming out of the Swinger closet - - We have to agree as well. If we are trying to convert or suspect that they are in the LS then we might hint, or make comments just to see where they may sit. But its part of OUR intimate life. Why would we want all to know? Not that its a bad thing, because it isnt. But I could only imagine what many would say, and blow out of proportion. The is a need to know basis...Sadly one of my step-sons knows... He was floored, but suspected. Come to find out one of his best friends parents are swingers and suspected that we were. Other than that it remains with our LS friends.
Club 90 party - - > Posted By: ADMINISTRATOR Reply posted on:
> Mar 24, 2006 - 3:42 pm
> Thanks HelloKitty... for those of you who did not know,
> we never gave KSL permission to come to the party.
> They inquired and we felt we should get feedback from
> the Spice Party guests before making any decisions.
> After hearing the feedback, we declined to allow them to film at the event.
So how did they find out about the party and get in touch with you in the first place? To find you it would seem to me that some reporter or research people are doing allot of research.
It seems too that allot of people are putting more weight on the fact that the media would be at the party rather then the fallout in the aftermath of of this. As others have said, KSL will not show faces or names, they can't under federal broadcasting laws. But I'm sure they will show screenshots of a computer with various swingers websites on it. Guaranteed there will be many Utahn's signing-up for free memberships to browse these sites for friends, neighbors, and members of their Ward. This is the real issue. Not the press itself on that night, but the publicity it will bring to the lifestyle.
Daybreak - Is the Daybreak area a hot spot for people in the LS? - There are a good number of swingers in both Herriman and SoJo (Daybreak) but no it's not even close to the picture you paint. Most of the houses in Daybreak are families with younger -teenage kids. There are a few local hotspots but they are all businesses. There are a few high-profile couples down here, but it's nothing like you have heard. LOL. And keep in mind they are couples, single males are generally called in to be a stunt cock/accessory, its not a roaming free-for-all a single male will just walk into.
Swingers Party - Doesnt mean who ever is there is open to everyone elsa - You should have come down to our party...No one did anythign that was not requested and/or OK'd,,,,
You are a better man than me...If someone did that to my Mrs....They would be toothless as fact as they kissed her like that...No doubt, somone will test me on this one now....Don't recomend it...LOL
Seriously,....They would be trying to figure out how an elbow got that far down their throat...
Males you wonder though.....With all this bashing of single men...were that(ose) guy(s) single or married?
Wedding ring pics - Just something alluring about those. Care to share? - Good heavens! What have you against wedding rings in on-topic photos? I find them a bit reassuring, even homey. They are a testament, in a way, to the fact that swingers are just people who enjoy a different sort of recreation.
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