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what if I want to but he doesn't - - [quote=NU2THEGAME]the worst part is that I consider myself intelligent with good common sense, so why can't i repress this- why is this so important to me right now? my hormones are taking over my common sense!! don't want to ruin a marriage for a cheap thrill- but also know that sex is a very important part of a marriage... part of it i'm sure is that I've been with him since i was 14..... i know this.[/quote]
There are many little things that we all do without that do not really affect our lives to any degree. But sometimes the little things turn out to be really big things. I would say that you have found one of yours.
I sounds like you are telling us that you everything your husband wants sexually. But there is something you need that you are not getting sexually. We could guess as to what that is but it would not help to guess. You need to examine and define what it is that you are lacking. Otherwise all we can do is talk in generalities. Some people only feel safe when things are neatly defined and unchanging.
I think that most swingers will tell you that sexually we get into a rut or pattern with any lover and that for many of us that is like the end of life. Most will also tell you that this lifestyle helps to keep you feeling alive and part of the world. You learn knew things from different people and your world opens wider.
Marriage changes how many think or act. Why that is would take many pages off topic. A marriage like good government should be one of give and take and compromise. Once one side had decided not to compromise or find a solution that makes their partner happy, then they have decided that the marriage is no linger important.
As an example: A woman once told me that after marriage her husband only touched her once a year on a specific day. The rest of the time he was a cold fish. That is all he wanted and what she wanted did not matter. In a way that was sexual abuse of the worst magnitude. To choose a celibate life for one
Sexy swingers closer to our age - 20-30 year old sexy swingers - 28 and 31 here! :)
The Vent part II - Secrecy - Small towns are a real pain in the posterior. We were asked if I was at the hospital when we came in at about 4am. We told tham that we were at a party that lasted a bit longer than we had expected. People here talk about other people on the other side of town... I think they can tell what you ate last night, and will tell everyone they comeincontact with about it. A for this specific case... I think I would just tell them that you have plans that do not involve them but maybe another time when things are not planned. Being good friends with "vanilla" people who are so hanggie oners can be a real drag if you are in the lifestyle. As for telling most people that you swing... well to say the least..... DOn't... I wouldn't tell my right winged brother that we swing... He would probably have a conniption. If friends ask if you swing, they alreasy have the notion and they are still there so if you think it's prudent... OK. Never just tell anyone just so that you are honest with you and in a small town.... you will probably be ostrisized. We have contacted people in this town who are on other sites and they usually will not answer a note. Afraid that people will find out who they are. We have met people on the streets that we know from clubs and generally just say hi or exchange pleasantries.... Happened yesterday at a local restaurant...met a guy with his daughter and we said hi and were very warm but the daughter looked very confused by it all... His wife wasn't there so we figured that his daughter was taking Dad out for FathersDay. Have met people we have played with and just said hi and little more and moved on... I haven't aclue why anyone would duck out of a club if they see some one they know, even a relative. They are there for the same reason as you and might be just as imbarrassed but your secrete is safe with them. One of my girlfriends and my wife and I were at a club social and she ran into her husbands boss... Nothing ever came of it and they didn't even ask why he wasn't there or who we were. We swingers are a very descreet lot, for the most part.. and seeing someone you know, at a club, generally results in nothing but another friend. We go to socials/dances/parties just about every week but in towns not too far away... If we meet people we know we are most likely to talk to them and say hi and talk about how great the music is that night or even hook up.... So one never knows ... Life is a joke within a joke sometimes.... and one need to learn how to laugh at what it brings to the table.
Shit Swingers Say - Hilarious Video.. - One of my all-time favorites.. [url=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5v-6_6qat4&list=PL1JZ_IMsHzmym9pC-JbiN35ErrRCdq2aX&index=2]Shit Swingers Say[/url] (YouTube)
Parties - - [quote=WATCHUSPLAY69]An idea for the folks here that mentioned the pushy and inappropriate touching..a safe area for those newbies and slow starters works well.[/quote]
How about just not doing it. Would you like some strange man walk up to your wife and grab her breasts just because your at a swingers party? Show respect.
Hot discussion - Hook up section? - [quote=OSTAR21]Swinger is a Swinger is a Swinger, Single married, committed, non-committed. What the fuck does it matter to you. The lifestyle was here long before Lookingforfun369 (creative name) were on here. You are the newbies and should show a little respect for others, whether you are into them or not. [/quote]
Actually, single "swingers" are a relatively new concept. When my wife and I first started swinging (the late 80's!) there weren't ANY singles in the lifestyle. In fact, it was several years, at least, into the lifestyle before we saw an ad (that's how swingers connected back then, thru ads in cheap magazines sold in porn shops) from a single male. We vividly remember someone passing the ad around at a swing party and everyone marveling at it and wondering out loud how he could enter the wife-swapping scene (that's what many still called it back then) without a partner of some sort.
Yes, the definition of swinger has changed or perhaps evolved is a better word. But there would BE no lifestyle, no swinging, if it wasn't for married, or at least committed couples, opening up their relationship to other people. Swingular would just be an AFF or a Tinder if it wasn't for couples. You might want to consider not getting quite so butthurt and taking your own advice about "show(ing) a little respect". Trust me, the single males who actually ARE successful here are those who do exactly that. If you don't believe me just ask around.
Black Ring - Who has theirs and how have they caught on? - Explain the black ring thing further. My personal situation is I am not a swinger, I am not part of a couple, I just happened to get involved with a swinger couple and my guy gave me a profile on here. So I don't count as a swinger, I'm just a single girl who likes dick very very much. And people involved with swingers are a good source for easy NSA dick. But I have no problem wearing a piece of jewelry that might let other people see that I have a wild side. As it seems, no one notices, but if more people try? Like seriously if there is a special ring or other piece of jewelry that announces to the world I am a slut and proud of it, count me in.
Swingers In Uniform - Pay your memorial day respects here. - Don Juan ,........My quote once again from Ronald Reagan " It's not that Democrats are ignorrant , It's just that they think they know so much that just isn't so " . I believe this was more directed towards the far left liberal such as yourself !
Poor was the right choice of words in describing those who support families on a military income . The choice of words such as wankers and cheers , cheers is how you signed off on your profile and would lead one to believe you are of British decent . The use of the name Don Juan and the use of the term the mother language in a previous post would further confirm the British decent . 5ft 9" tall and 165 lbs , long face and distorted teeth , came to America and married an American girl to stay in the country before your visa ran out . You played Don Juan on her , she divorced you and you spend more time on trying to get out of child support payments than you do working . You will not admit it and say its wrong but I know better !
You see Don , there is not one person born in America that is an American that would say that an American soldier did not die for him or his right to freedom . As you call them , morons , maybe we can keep them home and send you with your brilliance to the middle east to speak the truth and be a hero . If they are not understanding towards you and your dillusions I suggest try beating them over the head with your books and touted education .
Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - Looks like this site isn’t dead after all! Things are looking up.
Friends Lists - - Hi everybody... I think that this site started up in Utah, and is just gaining popularity in Florida. My guess is that the Tampa crowd will pick up on it very soon.
It maybe that the Tampa groups do not need a website to meet up. There are so many swingers in your area. I've always enjoyed my times in Tampa/St. Pete. Don't lose faith, but if you become impatient, you are always welcome to Jax. We've got a good thing going on up here.
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