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Cuming out of the Swinger closet - - [quote=CNTRLCPL][quote=SJA]After some time in the lifestyle, we have recently started to break the news to some of our close friends that we are swingers. We have great friends and so far they have taken the information really well. However, we have other friends that would never want to hear it, and god forbid if we ever told our family about it. What are everyone else's thoughts about coming out of the "Swinger" closet?[/quote] Have you even considered the implications for others that may want to stay "in the closet"? You may be committing "Swinger Suicide" as it were... your openness might be great for you, but other may want to stay behind the curtain and would not want to be outed by association. [/quote] This is an excellent point we hadn't thought about. Luckily, we've only shared with a couple VERY close friends. Plus, we keep our vanilla friends and swinger friends quite separate to avoid this situation.

Reject Affair Match - Cheaters are not swingers - Riderz, You crack us up!

Young swingers party - sold out, who still wants to party ? - [quote=ERASEDPANTS][quote=BMSHELL]I should probably add that if you didn't get tickets and you'd still like to attend, let me know and I can put you on the waitlist in case someone else cancels... (which, given how many people there are coming, is likely that a few spots will open up). Sorry for the thread-hijack Looking4Fun.... Back to the topic! Who wants to hang out with M&T? They're HOT! (Can vouch!) [/quote] Who are M&T? I also have to say Bshell, you do a great job of promoting without being pushy. I always admired that about you two. You seem very authentic and kind. We like that!

single males - - Thank you for opening the topic. I hope that it will be used shed some insight and not just complain. In a place like Habits there are vanilla singles that have no clue that swingers congregate there. So there will naturally be more problem in that environment than a private party. At a house party the only people that should be there are those that are invited by the host and hostess. Every one of the guests should have known the rules or etiquette of this lifestyle. If you had complaints, they should have been addressed last night with the hosts. Evidently the balance you were looking for was not there. Sadly it is difficult for most singles to figure out how to talk to a swinging couple. There are no schools or training centers to teach this. As a single male, conversation at a vanilla party with a couple is much easier. Most often the men and women separate and we talk with one or the other without expectations on either side. Sometimes conversation is just conversation. I find that making friends is generally more difficult in this lifestyle because of the sexual expectations of many. I think that you will find a number of the single men, after getting the cold shoulder from many husbands, find it easier to attempt to talk to the women because they lack the skills to talk with both. It is a mistake but it is also part of the learning process. There is no excuse for rude behavior on the part of the single male but neither is there an excuse for the typical married male attitude. Single males are always and have always been a pariah and dam few couples want them at any party. I came into this lifestyle as a single male looking to make male friends to hang with that would help me understand the rules. I found most of the males were cold and suspicious and difficult to talk with. I was not looking for women to play with nearly as much as I was looking for a girlfriend that was already in the lifestyle. But I am sure that as far as most were concerned all I wanted to find was their wife

Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - [quote=DOOGLE83]Oh wow! That is awesome to know![/quote] It must be hit or miss. We have only gone once but it was dead. No one really talked to anyone other than those they came with. We had high hopes.

Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - I was more meaning can I show up to Unspoken as a single male? I'm barely on facebook and only have a few friends. I'd still love to get into the group if possible though. Before that if I showed up without the password as a single msle would they let me in?

Hey - - Okay...the lack of compassion and depravity that others have never ceases to amaze me. Not five minutes after posting my reply...here is the private email I got from "someone" who had previously posted on this thread...a.k.a. UTCPL... Thought, You should get on a plane and go fuck this poor sap. In case you have not realized it yet this is a swingers sight not Dr. Phil's show. Maybe one or the both of you are the ones that need a good ass-fucking. It just might loosen up that tight sphincter you apparently have! Your true character is really shining at at it's best this weekend UTCPL. Any more methods you might employ to make proverbial asses out of yourselves? Maybe I need to get some popcorn and kick back to watch the ensuing show, eh?

Soft-core roll call - A call out to those interested in the softer side. - [quote=PARTYINLV]Canvas, It sounds like you and your wife are not quite on the same page yet, which is quite normal at the beginning of exploring the Lifestyle. You are looking for friendships with those who are in a similar situation. That's a good idea, but be prepared that even those friendships may be fleeting as the chemistry or level of comfort may still be different. At the beginning of our lifestyle journey, my wife and I were just as you are today, (I was also at a different level as my wife too). TheFunCouple offers excellent advice on going to meet & greets. I also add that you might want to check out a place like Sea Mountain Inn in Palm Springs. There you can see how comfortable it is to be nude in front of others and witness all the different levels of the lifestyle. You will have opportunities to talk to others and learn more. There is no pressure to play. Plus, you will be out of Utah and away from people who might recognize you. If you are adventurous enough, maybe plan a vacation to Temptations Resort in Mexico. This resort is not truly a lifestyle resort but is a lifestyle friendly resort since so many non swingers go there. It still is a sexually charged resort. You will meet a lot of people who are similar to you there and you have a whole week to be relaxed, get into vacation mode, and explore your steps into the lifestyle together without judgement or pressure.[/quote] Thanks. I'm totally fine with my wife not wanting to be with another man. And she's ok with me being comfortable with another woman. So, not being on the same page doesn't cause issues as much as it adds to the challenges. Any way, I completely agree with you and TheFunCouple about meeting people in person, going to meet-and-greets, etc. That would be the best way to meet and get a feel for people. Two problems with that for us though: 1) We live in Podunk i.e., a long ways from Lifestyle events and 2) neither of us likes parties or any sort of large social gatherings. We're not hermits or socially awkward. It's just not our thing. I appreciate your post as well as the others.👍

looking for a girl...Right Now! - - Kind of typical of your single male, they are a dime a dozen. The real swingers among them are as rare as a precious gem.

WHY????? - - 1. I have seen a lot of talk here about grammar and correct spelling. How the people that don't have that down pack other's more educated would not listen to or spend the time on reading their post because it means they don't or didn't have the right schooling.... no not the right schooling but their votes sure count. 2. I've seen people calling other fellow swingers that share the same lifestyle call others redneck's, especially if they are from the South. Guess what they also vote. 3. I see a lot of talk about America being a racist country for hundreds of years, yes that is true and we all know that. Finally people have been opening their eyes to see that America is a melting pot and IF MOST of us look at our ancestry, we might have a little bit of Indian, Spanish, African, Irish, Dutch, German and so on. I know, I did it, born and raised in the small Island of Puerto Rico with a grandfather that is Dutch(his fathers side) and German(his mom's side) and a grandmother that is an Islander Indian(dad's side) and Spainard(mom side) mix. They got married in New Jersy in 1943, can you imagine the racism they went through, I can because I heard the stories out of their own mouths. All races that are US citizens also vote. 4. We are putting people down for the things mentioned above. People that have much more education that what I have or others have. One way or another isn't all of the above a form of discrimination? no am not pulling the racial or discrimination card because am spanish... I don't give a rats ass about that.... We are here posting, right or wrong, we are. Instead of the BS back and forth. I impel all the "educated ones" to post facts and where they got it from in order for the "uneducated ones" to learn the truth and choose the right candidate that is going to help AMERICA. By helping other fellow Americans, we might get the right person in office! Tequila and others do post where they got their information and I thank them for trying to shed some light to others... Thank you guys.... By the way, sorry for my grammar and spelling. Like I said before, born and raised in Puerto Rico, became a very young mother with just a high school diploma........ until now that I am going for my education. Who knows I might be your next dentist and you not even know it's me.....