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KEY PARTY - - We 'get' and actually applaud the effort to find some way to avoid the often typical cliquey swing party but still have to wonder how feasible it might be in practice. The problem, as we see it, is that swinging is an atypical social construct in that it is driven almost entirely by superficial factors such as relative attractiveness (age, height, weight, body type, breast size, cock size, and any number of other physical characteristics).
When we first started swinging, back around the time Cleopatra was busy inventing hookup culture and the term unicorn, we quickly discovered that swinging wasn't the sexual egalitarian utopia that many people believe it should be. Indeed, there was actually a broad, distinct caste system, if you will, that governed who hooked up with who and who was relegated to the sidelines at least in certain circles or situations.
This might be best illustrated by one of our very early encounters with two couples at a swinger meet and greet back east. One of the couples was loudly expounding on their utter disgust with the concept that people in the lifestyle seem to be so "stuck-up" (their term) and were too concerned about "looks" and other superficial characteristics. They went on and on for probably close to an hour before they, I guess, ran out of steam and decided to leave.
After they were gone, the other couple at the table laughed a little bit and gave us some fairly sage advice. They told us that we would likely meet three general kinds of swingers in the lifestyle. They said that the first couple was the "Hey, you're swingers and we're swingers so let's fuck!" kind of people and that on the opposite end of the spectrum were the extremely picky, "beautiful people" who spent more time "watching the door" at a swing function always looking for the BBD (bigger, better, deal) and who more often than not left without actually hooking-up/playing.
They said that the relatively smaller group in between those two extremes were those who had a little more realistic attitude and who were, while still giving a good amount of weight to initial physical attraction, actually looking a little more FOR reasons to play rather than for reasons NOT to play. They told us to decide for ourselves what kind of swingers we wanted to be and go from there but to never fuck someone that we really didn't want to fuck. *shrug*
As to your idea of making it more of a "speed swinging" type of party, I'm almost certain that there are at least a few people here on Swingular who have talked about, if not hosted, just such a party. It might be interesting if they or any of their guests chimed in as to how it turned out.
sluts? what? - how so? - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET][quote=SHADOWINGWHISPERS][quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]There is a book called "The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities" written by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy that defines Slut in a positive light. They might be using slut in that context. The book has been very popular with swingers for quite a few years. [/quote]
I would hope they are using it in that sense.. but words that compile around the slut term make it strongly seem like it's a negative term.. sadly..[/quote]
If they are using it in a derogatory sense it may be because they are experiencing a certain level of self loathing because they are struggling to accept their own sexual nature or they may have peers and family that would do their best to destroy them were they to live so free as you are. I think that the anger that leads to name calling and judgment sometimes is a secondary emotion that people choose to embrace because the primary emotion is much more painful. They may want what you have but lack the confidence or courage to go find it for themselves and so the same people that call someone a slut in the derogatory sense far too often are the same people that go off and struggle with their own sexuality in dark places through lying, cheating, abuse and even darker acts while swimming in a sea of self loathing.
We should all jump up and down and be happy that you are free or striving to become free of such shackles![/quote]
That makes sense.. I hope everyone can undo the shackles!! Great understanding..
SOTD - A place to post your song of the day...preferably funny ones. :-P - [quote=LILMISSRIDINGHOOD]I think you missed this one, Evildoer:
Blow Me in the Car
www.youtube.com/watch?v=JEEzrohbtdk[/quote]
Oh, I have that one too but I like "God Is Gonna Fuck You Up", more. Cuz that's what He's gonna do to all you nasty swingers! [em]Emo_4[/em]
How Old Is Old - - My two cents is....Why should I open myself up like a flower and let every bee take some of my pollen dust....No that is never going to happen lol.
I don't care about age nor does the hubby. We are not the oldest or the youngest....Probably right in the middle. Being in the middle you get pulled from both ends....One will win while the other might not. However, if I open my mind I like to take my time and enjoy the splender in all of it. Mostly having the right connection is KEY to everything and everyone!
We have been lied to a time or two about ages and been suddenly surprised but, we still had a great time and may not and usually does not end in sex on the first time. Takes us a while to find a couple that we like and who likes us for who we are too!
I personally do not like to be told I do not have an open mind from people way older or way younger. As we are SWINGERS which to some means you are EASY...Which is not true in any way and why some bottom feeders make it hard for other then cry out for the unjustice.....Ummm Sex is about feeling alive and if you make us not feel that way, no matter the age. Then we shall pass by and keep looking.
Stabbing at swingers party? - - SCAREY!!!!!
advice for non-city locations? - What do you do when you live away from major cities? - HOTTPACPL370, damn all these crazy settings!
Actually, we haven\'t really used the internet for much at all. Instead we did the old fashioned method of going out to \"normal\" bars and meeting folks that way. It\'s a decent way to meet single women. We just figured trying the internet would be interesting since the folks on a site like this are already of a certain mind. At a normal bar you never know what you are going to meet or what their expectations are (like gals looking for a soul mate or husband or something). Of course, that can be part of the fun too! :D
Maybe there are fewer single gals on the site because they can more easily get what they are after? It seems that meeting them is easier done in person, but meeting couples would be easier here. I don\'t have a problem talking to a single girl about what I\'d like (neither of us do), but asking a couple if they are swingers seems like dangerous territory with some people, who could get really offended.
It\'s possible that we just don\'t know the couple dynamic very well, having only had singles (males or females) up till now. Maybe most folks wouldn\'t be annoyed or angry to be asked in person.
Rich and Amber - Hookup - As newborn swingers your thirst is extraordinarily strong right now and you will need to learn to control it when you're around werewolves and muggles and such. We would strongly recommend that you immediately go out hunting to quench your thirst and that you do so as FAR away from civilization as possible. If you go WAY out into the woods and "feed" on some hikers or campers you won't harm anyone important. Better yet, go fuck some wild animals or at least soft swap with them until you can control yourselves around people like vanillas. Otherwise, your overpowering desire to fuck just about anyone you cross paths with will kick in and who knows what kind of havoc you will wreak.
[img]https://thumbs.gfycat.com/AstonishingAdoredBorzoi-max-1mb.gif[/img]
Are swingers moral? - Who determines what morals are? - Simply put If you are Religieus you need to check their deffination of MORALITY.
If you're not then WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE IN, some form of "God" or "Paganism" etc.
Then Finally what do you Fell and think is RIGHT/Wrong.
CAN'T BE JUST ONE CORRECT RESPONSE.
Help us out.. Take this Survey - For Utah Swingers - Completed.
Mexico! Come with us!!! :) - Trying to put together a group of Swingers to go to Mexico with us! - We are leaving to Temptations on the 20th of April! Too bad we missed all you hotties from Swingular. If anyone is going let us know. It's our 3rd time back! Absolutly LOVE that place and can't wait to get out of this COLD. :)
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