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Playing Alone - - Couples all have different rules. Many categorically refuse to play alone with ANYONE ever. This is their "security" place. They feel comfortable in the place where they can see each other and "protect" if necessary. It takes some people a long time to get passed this.
It's kind of a 'control' thing leftover from the vanilla life. I'm not saying it's bad, good or indifferent it's just the way it is. Some people take longer to get passed their histories as vanillas than others. As they progress and get more comfortable with themselves, the lifestyle, their partners then they will slowly open up and begin to trust a bit more.
Don't take it personally, that's the key. Many people still hang on to their vanilla background that their partners are their most 'valued' possession. I liken it to my $450 deep sea fishing reel. Sure I'll loan it to someone to use if I'm on the boat with them and can make sure they're taking care of it. Is there anyone I'd just let 'borrow' it out right for the day or weekend? Not a chance in hell.
It takes time to let go of that 'she's/he's mine' get feeling. I think my wife and I took almost 6 years before we got there successfully. We tried many times before that but it never worked out well for either of us. We finally came to a point where it's okay to play separately everything from next room to next state it no longer bothers us. I personally prefer within 30 - 50 miles so she get's home faster for the "after play" sex you're describing (which I really like too.)
You'll have to find a VERY secure, VERY established, VERY strong couple to fulfill your fantasy. They are out there, my wife and I for example but even though we're open to playing separately are we open to YOU playing with her or me separately? That's a different level of trust. Does it mean no? No. It means "maybe" in time it's a possibility. (I'm speaking hypothetically of course.)
Don't worry your "couple" or "person" will come along. You might also try investigating a subsection of the lifestyle called "hotwifeing" while I know few swingers who are hardcore into only hotwifing, there are quite a few that tip toe in that part of the lifestyle (quick def, she plays he doesn't except with her.) That's the post play joy for you and the play and post play joy for her. Most people just bounce between that and swinging. There are people out there just be patient and don't expect it from any current playmates that you have established rules with, they need to progress at their own speed.
Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - [quote=JESSEJAMES][quote=EDANY0178][quote=JESSEJAMES][quote=EDANY0178]DVP? [/quote] double vaginal[/quote]Yes me please LOL[/quote] deal![/quote]SWEET!!!
Gym locations again 2018!!! - Which gyms are you guys at? - [quote=HELISWINGER]I’ve heard of treehouse. Is it true you guys have butlers? 😂[/quote]
We are at Treehouse. Yes, we have butlers there, but we call them "man-servants or "towel boys." Lol
Ironically we have never even been blinked at, let alone HIT on at the infamous "swingers gym." The staff is fastidiously careful to avoid even the slightest sexual comment or compliment. It's terrible. We just work out, throw up, and go home.
At what point do you out yourselves to family and friends?? - - More people know than you think. We have two small kiddos and so mums the word around them, but as for adults well we don't tell anyone except the vibe we throw off to the univeres is contantly comeing back. Hell we don't even know we are throwing it, but We surely are even other swingers in Wal Mart, Gas stations anywhere and more and more we notice them too and then confirm it with them. They might as well be wearing a T-Shirt that say "I'm A Swinger" LOL So the answer lyes in you your vibe is the answer to your ?
Great ?
kisses Jeaaica and Tre
Hot discussion - Hook up section? - Yup. It's actually gotten so bad that Ms. Evil and I have, for the first time in our long swinging career, blocked single males. We naively thought that maybe the number of single guys would start going down a little since we've heard so much about so-called "hook-up culture" and how it's supposedly relatively easy to jump on Tinder or Kik or to hit a bar or club and pick someone up for NSA sex. So can we assume that it's simply an urban legend? Either that or the single dudes here aren't having any success IRL for some reason?
And I apologize, JEFFSMITH1972, for all the terrible things married people have done to you and your "hotty" friend. Thoughts and prayers! [em]Emo_82[/em] Though I kinda have to wonder why you would hang out on a swingsite if you don't like married swingers. If the married swingers left Swingular would it still be a swingsite? [em]Emo_67[/em]
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - ULUV,
Yeah, ya know, I wouldn't take much to heart when it comes to comments from Utah in regard to anything racial...this is about the Whitest State in the US.
I honestly think that a lot of folks feel threatened by Single Males. Perhaps they've forgotten that they've been single? Forgot what that's like, maybe. Or maybe they were never single in this lifestyle. It's a tough crowd for a party of one.
I'm lucky enough to have been a single male in this lifestyle a couple of times. It taught me A LOT! I simply filled a niche and had a blast (and wasn't really lacking play...due to the niche).
And then there's Don...oye. Man, I'll send Ms. K_T over to drill a hole in the bottom of that bottle Don. We'll get it outta there in no time!
-K_T
On Premise Swingers Club - SLC - [quote=2INWVC]I'm probably betraying my ignorance here.
But what about West Wendover? (The Nevada side) Or maybe Mesquite?
I think there should be some houses there that the owners or banks are desperate to sell. Heck, the cops in either place might welcome some extra tax revenue.[/quote]
Would definitely have to agree. West Wendover would be better and more successful. Less population to "spy" on the club. Only 1.5 from SLC. The "Out of State, Out of Mind" philosophy would apply well there. That is probably why the Vegas clubs do so well.
Build it in SLC or anywhere near SLC and you will have problems from the "moral majority." Another possibility may be a ranch somewhere in a remote area close to SLC like Grantsville. But with the Wendover solution, at least there are hotels available.
Mav
Anyone else notice a lack of swinger hangouts? - Aside from some random dive bar, there is a lack of a real swinger hangout. - So, in the forums ive combed through for swinger hangouts. Aside from making new friends where we meet them and then invite them over for fun later (which dont get us wrong we love and will still be doing that) BUT, aside from some closed down bars and clubs swingers in slc, ogden, provo and tooele seem to be without a place to hang out. Hell ive heard little and less about even just identifying each other aside from one remark on lifestyle bracelets and more or less using swingular to meet up. So my question is there no way to just deem certain places and hangouts and wear something to identify ourselves so if other swingers are on the prowl they know were looking as well?
Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - Today up towards Solitude...
Skinny Dipping Spots - Where do you go sans clothes for a dip in Nature? - You can also meet up with the local naturist groups. They have naked activities all the time.
The UANR group rents the pool of a local dive shop twice a month for general naked swimming/chatting for the first half then water activities/games (volleyball, tag, etc) afterwards. You can follow their group at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/uanr
Other groups you can research are Utah Naturists, NudeUtah, FSD, Wasatch Front Naturists, Skinny-Trippers, AANR, TNS, INF, NLI.
Just be respectful and remember that they are naturists/nudists and are not swingers.
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