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ksl - did you watch?? - KSL would not post my reply ... I wonder why.... Here is a portion of it....
These people are kind, caring, successful people who I would love to have any of them as my neighbor. They have never tried to drag, lure, or trick, me. They have there rules of ethics, where no means no and they abide by it. At other parties I have attended I have had men keep hitting on me when I told them I was not interested, now to me that is wrong and disrespectful.
As a foot note; on a so called regular internet dating site I had over 120 men contact me and close to a half wanted a sexual relationship. So how is the 70 men a shocking figure? It pretty much what happens on the internet whether it is swingers or not. Its just on swinging sites they truthfully admit they are married instead of hiding it.
You may not have wanted to have heard my views and experience with these people. But I could not sit back and have them portrayed as something they are not, it would be wrong to do so. Sincerely Joanne D
Hollywood Swingers? - - We were wondering if any of you know what famous people are swingers...... we think Angelina Jolie could be, but has anyone confessed?
swingtown - a new show on cbs - I watched it and I loved it too.
I have an issue with them showing swingers as predatory and also the widespread drug use. However, like others said, drug use like that was rather prevalent at the time. Oh well, I am a fan and plan on watching or recording it every week.
For those who don’t understand the lifestyle - It’s what makes sense for you - The REALLY fucked up thing is how many people would or DO look down on swingers and swinging as something aberrant, abnormal, and disgusting, yet think people cheating and having affairs is a fairly normal part of life. It would seem that being open and upfront about your sexual desires with your spouse is somehow bad and sneaking around lying and cheating is good. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Friendship vs. spontaneity? - Are you here to make friends or just to fuck? - The perception of this lifestyle is that there is a whole lot of sex going on between everyone. Maybe if you are young slim and trim and willing to go to bed with everyone at the drop of a hat that is true. But that pretty much describes the young anyway. If that is your perception of all swingers, and you are here in Utah, then you are bound to be disappointed.
I think that this question comes up a lot because it is not a simple question for many of us and it seems to be posted by those seeking friends first. The end goal may be sex. But if that is your only goal then why do you say you are seeking friends. Friendships are not made in 30 seconds or a drink over at the pub. If that is what makes friendships in your mind then you are really just here for sex.
For us it is finding friends. Some folks that we meet we will play with and some we will be just friends with. It really boils down to a 4 way vote when it comes to the bedroom and maybe even being friends in the first place. And that is what makes finding friends and bedroom partners difficult. There is always the added fear of rejection that gets in the way when you want to anything anyone.
I look at all the complaints of one-nighters and couples that never speak again after sex. I can only surmise that for those folks sex is the only yard stick of friendship. You do not have to be sexually compatible to be friends.
We have found that if what you are looking for is friends, then it is easy to be part of the lifestyle. If what you are looking for is based on having sex then it is easy to be disappointed and difficult to be part of the lifestyle.
Furthermore we look at those that just want to screw and think how lonely their existence must be.
Those damn single men! - Where do they fit in this lifestyle? - WOW!! I go to work and I get all kinds of replies! Thanks to ALL!!!
I'm not here to change anyones way of thinking!
I'm not here to tell anyone they need to change!
I'm not here for a pissing contest, and have done my best with this thread to avoid pissing on anyones toes!
Hwy I always enjoy your input, you are straight up and blunt I like that.
Sexy LMAO I'd enjoy seeing you in action at a swingers club...
UTHOT Sorry, I havent been sleeping well, and I get bored...
Lets all have fun in whatever it is you do...
What is up with Utah?! - Swingers in Utah and nowhere else? - Stand Up and let them here from all the Hotties in Florida..........WE ARE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BUSTED! Your Kids Found Out Your Swingers. Now What? - - IMO, you wouldn't explain yourself about your monogamous "vanilla" sex life or activities, so why would you about this?
The subject of this thread was about your kids finding out. I'm not sure what age group of kids we're talking about and that can make a big difference. If they are adult children, you can simply tell them you are sorry they had to find out about it and regret that it makes them uncomfortable but it is your private life and will leave it there...in private. I think it is wise to reassure them that you will not do anything to embarrass them (start acting differently around them or other family members, etc.) and that nothing between you and them will change. Before they found out you were still the parent they loved and this will continue now.
If they are young children, it can be a little more complicated. The questions aren't just about the lifestyle but also about sex since they are probably learning and curious about the topic in general. But, you could keep it very simple (& age appropriate) and explain that sex is something adults enjoy privately and that if they have any questions about sex (emphasis not on swinging) you will be happy to answer.
If they pursue asking about swinging, I would just share that this is something better explained when they are a little older and that honesty and communication are valued so you will try to be as honest as you can be. However, you don't need to go into detail IMO. Often, kids are looking more for your reaction and some reassurance and aren't quite as concerned with the actual "words". They want to know their world isn't being disrupted.
The rest of your post mentioned family members, etc. Again, you would never feel obligated sit around and discuss the details of a vanilla sex life so it isn't necessary to discuss the details of swinging.
You could share that if someone has a private question they would like to ask they can if that's the kind of relationship you have with them. But, you can also add that you will only do so if comfortable.
I might stress or emphasize that you and your partner have an open and honest relationship that you enjoy together. There are a number of factors that go into enhancing that relationship making it so special and that they've stumbled onto one area that you've incorporated/explored. You appreciate that it might not be for everyone and you wouldn't expect everyone to understand but that you sincerely hope they would also be as considerate to not judge the two of you. I might add that while you've tried to be candid when answering their questions, you only ask in return that they respect your privacy and not share what they've learned or discussed with anyone else. Include them into the agreement by explaining that you will extend to them the same discretion they extend to you.
Who knows...one of them may have been curious about exploring the lifestyle and you might just be that one person they feel comfortable asking about it.
At the same time, people can be very judgemental so protect yourselves. However these family members found out...it could happen again if that avenue hasn't been fixed. I'm sorry this got so long-winded and I could write so much more. Whew!!! Good luck with this!
Bubulaplease - Confidentiality - Something that has bothered me a little bit...when we went to Lumpys the doorman asked if we were there for the Sinful event. We says yes and as we were walking down the stairs some people upstairs asked him what was going on and he said it was a swingers party. I mentioned it to a few people that night and it seemed that it was a normal occurrence. We realize that going to the events we may run into someone we know, however, people who don't know about our lifestyle also go to lumpys. I would hate for them to know there was a swingers party going on and then see us leaving or something. My question..is this normal? Is it this way at, say, Sandy Station? Do the group organizers ask for confidentiality?
Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - The FB group is hidden, so you won't be able to search it. But if you're in other lifestyle groups, just post asking if any of your friends are in the unspoken group and one of them can invite you
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