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Playing Alone - - Couples all have different rules. Many categorically refuse to play alone with ANYONE ever. This is their "security" place. They feel comfortable in the place where they can see each other and "protect" if necessary. It takes some people a long time to get passed this.
It's kind of a 'control' thing leftover from the vanilla life. I'm not saying it's bad, good or indifferent it's just the way it is. Some people take longer to get passed their histories as vanillas than others. As they progress and get more comfortable with themselves, the lifestyle, their partners then they will slowly open up and begin to trust a bit more.
Don't take it personally, that's the key. Many people still hang on to their vanilla background that their partners are their most 'valued' possession. I liken it to my $450 deep sea fishing reel. Sure I'll loan it to someone to use if I'm on the boat with them and can make sure they're taking care of it. Is there anyone I'd just let 'borrow' it out right for the day or weekend? Not a chance in hell.
It takes time to let go of that 'she's/he's mine' get feeling. I think my wife and I took almost 6 years before we got there successfully. We tried many times before that but it never worked out well for either of us. We finally came to a point where it's okay to play separately everything from next room to next state it no longer bothers us. I personally prefer within 30 - 50 miles so she get's home faster for the "after play" sex you're describing (which I really like too.)
You'll have to find a VERY secure, VERY established, VERY strong couple to fulfill your fantasy. They are out there, my wife and I for example but even though we're open to playing separately are we open to YOU playing with her or me separately? That's a different level of trust. Does it mean no? No. It means "maybe" in time it's a possibility. (I'm speaking hypothetically of course.)
Don't worry your "couple" or "person" will come along. You might also try investigating a subsection of the lifestyle called "hotwifeing" while I know few swingers who are hardcore into only hotwifing, there are quite a few that tip toe in that part of the lifestyle (quick def, she plays he doesn't except with her.) That's the post play joy for you and the play and post play joy for her. Most people just bounce between that and swinging. There are people out there just be patient and don't expect it from any current playmates that you have established rules with, they need to progress at their own speed.
Just for kicks & giggles - Ginger or Maryann? - c'mon you guys, no fair, i know we're swingers but you can't have both! that's part of the game, it's a hard choice but you can only pic one!
Question - do you talk about other swingers? - Bottom line is, no matter how big an area you reside in, (it can be the entire state) if you drop dime, it WILL catch up with you! Always best to keep your guts on the inside...
~D&T~
Excuse me? But are you guys swingers? - Excuse me? But are you guys swingers? - Sometimes you meet a couple or you meet people that give you the impression,
they might be in the lifestyle or want to try it. But how do you ask without being
rude, or offending someone? Any Ideas guys?
-Latinlovers22
p.s. If anyone would like to play with us feel free to respond.
Swinger Moving Sale - Lots of Nice Stuff for Sale. - Swinger Friendly Couch Sold to some Lovely Swingers. Lots More..
What sets you apart from other swingers - Lets see whos looking for what. - I guess my advantage and disadvantage at the same time is my age...it goes with the bum per sticker....young men fuck, old men make love, even if it's just for tonight...*S*
IS it me or is UTah The place to be if your a swinger? - Utah and swinging - After being on this site for a few days, I have noticed alot of the active members are from Utah. :$: :p
Is it the fact that this site is largely based there or is Utah A crazy Fun swingers state?
female AGE turn on-off - - Posted By: SPERMINT Reply posted on:
Aug 26, 2008 - 3:25 pm
Yes indeed , i know the females disagree with the concept of cheating and dislike my advice , my reply was intended to the men on this site ,
you will not find a marriage consular nor a family therapist that will not advice the way i did , in a private practice you would pay $ 250 per hr. for 2 hour the minimum for this advice ,my dear swingers ,
you got it for free ! enjoy fucking and cheating
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This is the guy speaking. Your attitude is deplorable. Lets use a simple word for you and say it is bad.
Really? Would you want to bet on that? How much money you got if I can find one "that will not advice the way i did"?
And that is all your free advice is worth. Nothing.
Swingers Kickball Society - - We are definitely interested, sounds like a blast.
Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - Maybe in our wildest fantasy. [em]Emo_4[/em]
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