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Swingers dying out? - Is the utah swinger community dying or becoming to needy? - Yep, swinging's as dead as a doornail. We're thinking of taking up pornographic cross- stitching to fill the void. [em]Emo_96[/em]

The Vent part II - Secrecy - Small towns are a real pain in the posterior. We were asked if I was at the hospital when we came in at about 4am. We told tham that we were at a party that lasted a bit longer than we had expected. People here talk about other people on the other side of town... I think they can tell what you ate last night, and will tell everyone they comeincontact with about it. A for this specific case... I think I would just tell them that you have plans that do not involve them but maybe another time when things are not planned. Being good friends with "vanilla" people who are so hanggie oners can be a real drag if you are in the lifestyle. As for telling most people that you swing... well to say the least..... DOn't... I wouldn't tell my right winged brother that we swing... He would probably have a conniption. If friends ask if you swing, they alreasy have the notion and they are still there so if you think it's prudent... OK. Never just tell anyone just so that you are honest with you and in a small town.... you will probably be ostrisized. We have contacted people in this town who are on other sites and they usually will not answer a note. Afraid that people will find out who they are. We have met people on the streets that we know from clubs and generally just say hi or exchange pleasantries.... Happened yesterday at a local restaurant...met a guy with his daughter and we said hi and were very warm but the daughter looked very confused by it all... His wife wasn't there so we figured that his daughter was taking Dad out for FathersDay. Have met people we have played with and just said hi and little more and moved on... I haven't aclue why anyone would duck out of a club if they see some one they know, even a relative. They are there for the same reason as you and might be just as imbarrassed but your secrete is safe with them. One of my girlfriends and my wife and I were at a club social and she ran into her husbands boss... Nothing ever came of it and they didn't even ask why he wasn't there or who we were. We swingers are a very descreet lot, for the most part.. and seeing someone you know, at a club, generally results in nothing but another friend. We go to socials/dances/parties just about every week but in towns not too far away... If we meet people we know we are most likely to talk to them and say hi and talk about how great the music is that night or even hook up.... So one never knows ... Life is a joke within a joke sometimes.... and one need to learn how to laugh at what it brings to the table.

Game ON....which sign is Hornier...(is that a word?) - zodiac signs of swingers? - Add a Libra for the Mrs and Taurus for the Mr.

Club Zu Key West Rant - - Here's our take on Club Zu or as the locals call it Club Pu. It's the worst bar on the island and it's only a matter of time before it closes. The only reason they've been open as long as they have is because they try to high pressure sell you into paying the $200 so you can go into the back room which never has any people. We've been in there 4 times and will NEVER go back. The owner is the rudest person we've ever met and it trickles down to his bartenders. No smiles, no hellos, no nothing, just give us your fucking money. He wouldn't know what a swingers club was if it smacked him on the back of the head. Don't believe the bullshit about not wanting customers to get to drunk so they don't have premium liquor. The truth is they don't have a full liquor license and don't have ANY liquor (the owner didn't want to spend the extra money to buy one) so they serve you beer or "wine based liquor" what the fuck is wine based liquor???? And they over charge you for it, how about $40, not including tip for 2 glasses of house wine and 2 of their fake margaritas which were nothing but sour mix. Nowhere in Key West do drinks cost that much and taste so shitty. And the reason they have ESPN on the television screens is simple, the owner is clueless about what he's doing. They used to have porn on the screens, but they like to keep the front door open... so people walking past the bar could see the TVs and someone complained. So the genius that owns the bar... instead of just "closing the front door" he decided to put on ESPN in his so called "swingers bar". Brilliant move, that will sure set the right mood. Also, nothing like rap crap playing to loud coming out of the speakers to set the mood for swinging. This place is so bad it's laughable. The final straw for us was the last time we were in there we ordered a beer (couldn't handle anymore $10 glasses of sour mix) and went to sit down on one of the lounge chairs... I sat down and the chair was wet, put my finger in it to see what it was and it was urine!! Someone had pissed all over the chair!! That explains why the club always smells bad and everyone calls it Club Pu!!!! All we can say is, buyer beware!

The New Neighbors Are Swingers - - So clever. My neighbors growing up had all these. My young self had no idea.

Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - We do DP often... It is one of my most favorite sexual encounters... Mr Knotty is my "backdoor man" but if we get to know a man very well, he does get to ring the rear bell on occasion once trust has been built...

I Have A Question - Poly vs. Open - Mr. and I have been in a committed poly relationship with another couple for 3 1/2 yrs. Both we and the other couple had been in the LS for 3-4 years before this. Our trajectories were different - Mr. and I were pretty bored with swinging. We had lots of fun adventures, but we both tend to crave more intimacy and I, in particular, don't find myself attracted to many men until I am intellectually attracted to them, and that generally takes more time and effort than the average swinger wants to put in. We had tried only dating unicorns for a year, and then went to more of an open style marriage (infrequent, but occasional hall passes. Sometimes with both members of the same couple, sometimes not). But even that wasn't as satisfying as I wanted and my interest in the LS was waning. That's when we stumbled upon our Others. We were at a vanilla swirl party (a few LS, mostly vanilla) and immediately picked them out as LS. What do you know, we clicked. I immediately was drawn to the husband, he to me, and our spouses soon felt the same. We began spending time together as a foursome pretty much from that day forward. Their trajectory was different than ours. They were classic swingers--meet at a party, click, arrange sex or fuck then and there. Sometimes these people became friends over time, sometimes not. They didn't crave the intimacy we did; they enjoyed the spontaneity, excitement and variety. Their relationship was never open. No hall passes, almost always straight partner swap with another couple, but occasionally they would mix that up at a party situation. So it's kind of surprising that they ended up down this road of polyamory. We just clicked and loved every minute with each other and really never have wanted to be apart. HOWEVER, we are all four still swingers in some way or another. It has become more apparent after the honeymoon phase has settled into a deeper, more real relationship. They occasionally still want that exciting fling. We do too, only less often as the stars REALLY have to align for me. Mr and I still occasionally like sex with a deeper connection. There have been moments when we resented their desire for casual sex. There have been moments when they resented our need for deeper connection. But in the end, like any LS couple, we were able to talk it through. And we were able to realize how all of us can be fulfilled and have our needs met. We just had to drop the jealousy and insecurity and really want to please the people we love.

Christian Swingers - - What the fuck does religion have to do with swinging? I challenge you to show me one widely accepted, modern, religion that condones "swinging".

Burnt out from searching - - [quote=EVILDOERS][quote=ThroughTheVeil]Maybe the problem is that you're shooting too high? I mean, don't get me wrong, everyone has their preferences, and at the end of the day, you shouldn't do anything (or anyone) you don't want to, but were in a similar boat of having to reach out a lot and getting rejected, a lot... even after making quick contact (or even longer contact) with a couple. Now if we didn't care who we met up with, we'r would have a different couple every night we had free time and some to spare, so having standards is important for time management also. What I'm saying is, if you're frustrated with how little (quality) contact, maybe you should give more people the benefit of the doubt. I can think of couples that we initiated contact, 4 or 5 times before meeting, and then when we finally did, had a great time and became good friends, but that also meant reaching out to couples 6 or 7 times before realizing we were wasting our time swallowing our pride over them.[/quote] The Lord and Lady of the Veil (Vale?) make a very good point. We've found that MANY swingers (Ourselves included.) are somewhat predispositioned (Yes, I know that's not really a word.) to constantly be on the lookout for what we might consider the perfect or ideal couple/connection and thus ignore people we might actually end up having a fairly great connection with because they didn't check one of our boxes for things thought we were looking for. Far too often it's too easy to overlook a good or even great couple when searching for the perfect one (That might not actually exist!). How much great or even just good sex might we be passing up in the pursuit of perfect sex? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯[/quote] Very well said and obvious to many and acknowledged by few. We decided after the 1st couple of years the perfect couple may not look like the perfect couple but if we had a great connection it did not matter. Wildcouple88 we live in Houston and have never had a response from anyone in our area. We have met many great couples in SLC area when we cum in for about 8 weeks a year in the winter to ski.

swingin - thought this site was a swingers site - I think "Forum" is about being able to talk about any thing you want....doesnt have to be about just sex. If you want just sex or friendship, talk to people individually........ Just my thoughts :) Jenn