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The vent! - Judgements, I'm so tired of them. - On judgments:
My wife and I were in the lifestyle for many years. She died 5 years ago of cancer and was the love of my life. It has been very hard for me as we were married for 34 years. Many of our friends were swingers because, as others have found, those not involved in the lifestyle often have negative judgmental attitudes. We made many friends.
After she died I was supported by my friends but I was no longer invited to parties. For a while that was fine because I wasn't ready. But since I've tried to renew my lifestyle activities, I've found that I am no longer welcome. Why? Because I'm a single male. Forget that my wife and I were involved in the lifestyle up in Seattle, forget the many times we hosted parties at our house, my wife's death made me a pariah to other swingers.
I really do not understand this. I'm still the same person. I'm discrete, clean, disease and drug free, I'm not pushy and no always means no. I guess I do not understand why all of a sudden I'm no longer welcome at parties i used to attend.
Yes, many people not in the lifestyle judge those of us who are. But a large number of people in the lifestyle are just as judgmental, only they pretend that they are not.
can we swing and still not be in sin ? - - For what it's worth here is my 2 cents on the subject.
I agree with Don on what he said earlier in this thread. The entire concept of sin was created by the religious leaders as a form of control. Every organized religion serves 3 primary purposes; 1) to explain the why's and how's of creation, 2) to give a foundation of how to live, 3) to give comfort about death. From the beginning of time religious leaders have used the power of religion as a means of controlling the masses to do what the leaders wanted or at least thought was best.
Judao-Christian and Islamic religions went a step farther and created the concept of sin as a method of control. They created a list of commandments and declared that to violate these was to be in sin. Some sins were of greater import than others but it all equalled to the same thing, commit too many or even one of the wrong ones and you would be barred from from enjoyment and peace offered in the afterlife.
So to answer the original question here, Can you swing and not be in Sin? Absolutely you can. Sin cannot exist seperate of heavily regulated and controlled organized religion. Since Religion itself is a fabrication of man, then so Sin is also a fabrication. I don't know too many swingers that particularly care for anyone else telling them what to do, how to do it, or whom they can do it with, regardless of the area of their life. Especially when it comes to their sex life.
Game ON....which sign is Hornier...(is that a word?) - zodiac signs of swingers? - She is a Taurus and He is a Gemini,,,weg
Male on male - Not sure if this is where this goes, but male on male tonight only. - I think part of the problem why guy's don't want to put it on the profile or try it is
they may be afraid if their GUY friends would ever find out that might cause problems with their friends. Remember these site's can be accessed by anyone this is the same reason alot of swingers don't post a face photo.
Why are there so many swingers from Utah? - - Hey, Florida can hold it's own her too!
B_k_lovers - Getting over first-time jitters - ^^Most definitely
Honestly, a large part of the lifestyle (in our experience) is figuring out what you want and how to communicate that with other couples. Personally, I would not just strip unless I'm sure all 4+ people are on the same page.
They did a few seminars on this topic at Young Swingers Week in Jamaica last week. There were some good pointers there, such as using body language/touch (shoulder is casual, elbow is more interested, small of back is intimate) and gauging reactions. Or giving the other couple plenty of chances to say "yes" either through word or action by opening up opportunities to do so.
One of the things that we like to do as a couple is invite another couple (or single friend, or small group) over to play naughty board games. Turns out you can turn any game into a strip game if you're creative enough, and that's a good way to allow people to ease into whatever their comfort level is. Every gets as naked as they feel is comfortable, then you can start swapping "favors" or "truth or dare" style challenges or whatever instead of stripping once you're as naked as you want to be.
Swingers In Uniform - Pay your memorial day respects here. - AMEN Tequilarose, you are a goddess! I agree with you completely except one thing, he belongs in Iran or Syria.
Swingers clubs or parties - - I'd like to know the answer to that as well. I live in Atlanta and I'm going to Greenville, SC this week.
We thought this was educational and should explain a lot about s - keep an open mind. Swingers are spiders. Each to their own unique ways! - Hahahahaha
New Swingers Club in Utah - Gauging interest in new club - My answers to the questions -
Yes, I would attend.
Probably every couple of weeks, if not more often.
I find the idea of charging more for single males to be pretty repulsive. There are single girls like me who want to go have fun and don't want to play with attached males. Charging more for single men limits my options and honestly, would keep me from going. That policy heavily favors married/attached men, as fewer single men will attend if the price is higher.
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