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Frustration with Friend Requests - - [quote=EVILDOERS]The underlying problem is the "we're swingers, you're swingers" mindset. We've been around the scene for a long time and met many many people who don't understand why we won't just fuck them...afterall, they're swingers and we're swingers...so let's just fuck already. This "hobby" is for fantasy fulfillment. If you aren't at least a little bit attracted to someone for any reason then what the hell is the point of fucking them? Especially when most of us can stay home and have WAY better sex with someone we love. [/quote]
Well put!!!
LDS Swingers Survey - Will any former/active LDS swingers take my survey? - Done and done
Psychology Research Results - This is a follow up to my earlier post. This is what I found because some showed interest. - I would like to thank everyone who did the research survey for me. I hypothesized that non swingers would view us as more capable of deviant behavior like using drugs and alcohol in large amounts. I was correct. I hypothesized that swingers were more likely to use positive methods to handle relationship conflicts and I was also correct. I also hypothesized that swingers would have high openness to new things and high extroversion. We did find that swingers were more open to new experience but there wasn't enough on the other. Something we found interesting was that non swingers used more aggressive methods to solve relationship conflicts and they had high sexual depression. My teacher is talking about possibly working on this to get it published. I am beyond happy that I can show us in a better and more recent light. Thank you all for your help. If you have any question let me know.
swingers parties - - Fl4, I can see you actually using that line....
Gym Fantasy - anyone else get turned on while working out? - Any swingers go to the anytime fitness in bountiful? Would love to work out with some couples in the lifestyle
Great New T-Shirts From Hell - http://www.tshirthell.com - There's another pretty cool site with a bunch of shirts aimed at Swingers. Check out:
http://www.partynekkid.com
We ordered some stuff from them to give as gifts for the Holidays. They were quite a hit with our friends, both Swingers and Vanillas!
Newbie "outdoorsy" couple interested in the softer side. - Wish to develop a friendship with another couple in S ID, N UT - [quote=Canvas][quote=LILMISSRIDINGHOOD]There are couples and singles in the lifestyle, who have been in the lifestyle for a while, who also like to take things slow. Some don't want to just jump into bed, but they are aware of the many ins and outs of the lifestyle. I've been in the LS for years, but prefer to make friends, first, then decide if I want to go further if they, too, want to go further.
If you want a friendship with no sexual strings attached, I suggest you look for others who feel the same. Narrowing your search down to just newbies, or suggesting that's what you're looking for, limits your options. You might consider meeting people with the precondition that you don't swap, but you may reconsider at a later date. [/quote]
Thanks for your input. It is appreciated! Our thinking with looking for newbies was that we could all be nervous together and learn together. However, it's not like we know our way around these waters. All this has actually been very humbling to me (male half). I'm used to diving into things and doing well from the start. Here though.... it all feels so foreign, intimidating. Maybe it's due to my wife and I marrying right out of HS. We dated others in HS but that was so long ago with entirely different maturity levels.
At any rate, your point is well taken. We welcome any advice and constructive criticism we can get. Thanks again! [/quote]
What, specifically, feels intimidating? Or perhaps a better question would be what do you fear? Are you afraid that one of you will fall in love with a playmate and leave the marriage? Or that one or both of you will like swinging too much and become big ole sluts? LOL Or maybe you're afraid of contracting a horrific sexually transmitted disease and your junk will fall off? *grin*
Most of us are TERRIBLY bad at risk assessment and more often than not we fear things that are statistically FAR less likely to happen than things we don't seem to fear all that much. Some people won't fly in planes even though they are FAR less likely to die in a plane crash than driving their car to Walmart. And many swingers are deathly afraid of getting AIDS even though it's really quite hard to contract compared to, say, HSV, which most adults have actually already been exposed to. Identifying why you're intimidated might be a better use of your time than trying to find a needle in a haystack.
But in the end, do what you're comfortable doing. If you think finding another newbie couple is the least intimidating way to dip your toes in then, by all means, do that. Those of us who have been around the scene for a while, however, could tell you some of the drawbacks to meeting people who are newbies.
Personally, we would seek out a more experienced couple, albeit one who is NOT pushy and is willing to go at your pace and is looking for friendship more than sex. The reason I say that is if things DO turn sexual, a more experienced couple is less likely to freak out or have other issues that they haven't already dealt with. Either way, good luck.
Game for Swingers - Has anyone heard of a new game for lifestyle couples called Titillation? - www.greatsexgames.com
Jungle Gym
Burnt out from searching - - Keep in mind that a lot of profiles on here are entirely fabricated, or inactive. You can't trust the "Last Visit" date on their profile because swingular puts inactive profiles online to give the feel of more activity than there really is. We know this because we have an old profile on here that we abandoned a long time ago and we don't even remember the password. We see it showing up on the "Members Online" page sometimes. I can assure you, that member is NOT online.
Anybody else notice that so many of of the new members, almost always from outside of Utah, have their profile pictures posted sideways. Bots can't see when that happens, they're just populating empty fields. There are three of them showing up in the new members list as we type this.
Swingular is a Utah centric site. We moved to South Carolina for a while and we sent out maybe 100 messages to members that "were online" at the time, and never got a single response. We never got a message from any of the "active" members on our area. Nobody ever accepted a single friend request. But there were plenty of active swingers showing up on the site. Weird.
Hollywood Swingers? - - Howard Stern had talked about John Stamos and Rebecca hanging with him and his future wife Beth on occasion. He never tells the whole story, but eludes to the fact that they may have swapped partners.
Sirius channel 100 for those who care.
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