Vanduser Swingers in Missouri

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How do you spot a Swinger..?! - tell tell signs of the lifestyle - I really think that we should go with the wristband idea because even when I got to our clubs I cannot tell who is or isn't! Nothing is worse then having a gf yell at you to quit looking at her man because they aren't swingers...my come back was, I wasn't checking him out, I was looking at you! That shut her up! But seriously, the wristbands would be wonderful!

Black Rings - Do Swingers really? - We wear the black rings, not sure if people notice though

Ways to point out Swingers in public - - I personally think we should all get tattoos. I do think the commercial with sling and swingers could be good way to test Waters. Use it as reference for a joke.

Christain Swingers? - - We believe that being christian and being in the lifestyle go hand and hand the bible teaches to love everyone, be kind to everyone have you ever stopped to think that just maybe the reason you meet each and every person thoughtout life is not by accident? We have found since being in the lifestyle that there have been some profound reasons we have met certain people in this lifestyle here is a quick version of a actual event.While we were in europe working for a contractor a cpl contacted us on a swing site they were from Virgina. Once we met(M&S) they admitted that they never really thought we would meet face to face but after returning from europe we had to travel through Richmond Virgina and we figured what the hell lets look them up so we did and had one hell of a time with them now here is the "divine part". Another cpl (B&S) we had met who contacted us while in Germany (they were traveling through europe) and we manged to meet play and have some fun guess where they are from? Yep you guessed it ,Richmond Virgina! While spending time with the first cpl (M&S) we contacted the other cpl (B&S) they invited us to a party but said "our friends could not come along until they had met them first" so, we did not go to thier party but we did put these two cpls in contact with one another guess what they are now the best of friends and go to each others parties now! Go figure, they found each others through us thousands of miles away yet when they met each others they found out they only lived a block away from each other and they both belonged to the very same prestigeous BDSM society! in the D.C. area! We have many many facts that has happended since we have been in the lifestyle and to us we could not have planned that it had to be divine intervention! Does the lifestyle and christianity go hand and hand you bet and won't convince us otherwise we have had too many of those types of situations happen since we have been in the lifestyle. Some will say its the devil at work we beg to differ it all depends how you interpet what the teachings tell you and who is to say that the bible has not been manipulated since the days of christ? Norm&Sharon

Newbie "outdoorsy" couple interested in the softer side. - Wish to develop a friendship with another couple in S ID, N UT - [quote=Canvas][quote=LILMISSRIDINGHOOD]There are couples and singles in the lifestyle, who have been in the lifestyle for a while, who also like to take things slow. Some don't want to just jump into bed, but they are aware of the many ins and outs of the lifestyle. I've been in the LS for years, but prefer to make friends, first, then decide if I want to go further if they, too, want to go further. If you want a friendship with no sexual strings attached, I suggest you look for others who feel the same. Narrowing your search down to just newbies, or suggesting that's what you're looking for, limits your options. You might consider meeting people with the precondition that you don't swap, but you may reconsider at a later date. [/quote] Thanks for your input. It is appreciated! Our thinking with looking for newbies was that we could all be nervous together and learn together. However, it's not like we know our way around these waters. All this has actually been very humbling to me (male half). I'm used to diving into things and doing well from the start. Here though.... it all feels so foreign, intimidating. Maybe it's due to my wife and I marrying right out of HS. We dated others in HS but that was so long ago with entirely different maturity levels. At any rate, your point is well taken. We welcome any advice and constructive criticism we can get. Thanks again! [/quote] What, specifically, feels intimidating? Or perhaps a better question would be what do you fear? Are you afraid that one of you will fall in love with a playmate and leave the marriage? Or that one or both of you will like swinging too much and become big ole sluts? LOL Or maybe you're afraid of contracting a horrific sexually transmitted disease and your junk will fall off? *grin* Most of us are TERRIBLY bad at risk assessment and more often than not we fear things that are statistically FAR less likely to happen than things we don't seem to fear all that much. Some people won't fly in planes even though they are FAR less likely to die in a plane crash than driving their car to Walmart. And many swingers are deathly afraid of getting AIDS even though it's really quite hard to contract compared to, say, HSV, which most adults have actually already been exposed to. Identifying why you're intimidated might be a better use of your time than trying to find a needle in a haystack. But in the end, do what you're comfortable doing. If you think finding another newbie couple is the least intimidating way to dip your toes in then, by all means, do that. Those of us who have been around the scene for a while, however, could tell you some of the drawbacks to meeting people who are newbies. Personally, we would seek out a more experienced couple, albeit one who is NOT pushy and is willing to go at your pace and is looking for friendship more than sex. The reason I say that is if things DO turn sexual, a more experienced couple is less likely to freak out or have other issues that they haven't already dealt with. Either way, good luck.

What is is with local couples? - Anyone else seem to have the problem with couples local to where you live NOT wanting to meet? - Common decency...What is that? Ignoring someone's email seems to be the way to NOT say they are not interested...Seems plain old rude...especially when there is an easy no thanks email already written for you on here... Anyway...If you ever get to FL SWMTCPL...We would not ignore you ;) Also...he thinks there are a lot of "fantasy swingers" on these sites...they are all about the fantasy...BUT when it comes down to it...they are not ready or willing to do anything...Rather than say so, they ignore you...Just HIS opinion

thoughts on Pictures - - Just our 2 cents on the subject.......Some people have to protect themselves for reason of job, family, community and what have you. Here we have no problem with a genital shot AS LONG as they have facial or g-rated full pics to back up what they show. We have g-rated that we are glad to send to others once we get to know them a bit and b/4 we would meet. We have seen on other sites, people using other peoples pictures and have seen some pictures that were removed from a certain site and openly posted on the internet. We are sure that most people do not want their pastor, mayor or next door neighbor to receive a picture of them shouting to the world that they are swingers! Again, just our 2 cents on the subject.

Not getting much action on here - - Lol. Think of what you can do for the swingers site not what the swinger site can do for you. Lol On a more serious note... I think if we spend just a little more time looking at our profiles from second/third party view/angle we will see part of the problem. Hey you know what? 90% of the problem is the profile 5% is the first contacts and 5% you choose.. Swingular gave us a platform to connect.. I am not sure there is a payment plan that includes 1)what to say 2) where to meet 3) how to take it to the next level 4) how to improve skills in bed.. etc. I didn’t think this site will be the UBER- for swingers (giving members RIDERS) until uber for swingers is created get your appreciation mode activated. Lmao cya.

When does interest become pushy??? - - I've been thinking of this topic a lot since it first came out. I appreciate all of the comments made. EVILDOERS said, "Confidence is sexy", and I agree. I see a coupe of things here worthy of comment. First, in this game, women are totally in control. Sex is probably the strongest power position they have. All men want it, women control it. When they say no, or not interested, it's the end of the line for a man. HOW they say it is different. And how a man receives the rejection is different. Anybody who knows me social or professionally would never characterize me as shy. I'm outspoken and engaged most of the time. Because I've been rejected less than politely for advances in the swingers scene before, and after a lot of retrospection didn't deserve the rudeness of the rebukes, I'm a little more reserved, maybe even gun shy. The fact is, in this lifestyle, no matter how good you are, sooner or later you're going to get rejected. The person doing the rejecting may have had a bad day and be less than polite, but it also could be that you're not handling rejection well. Recently at a meet and greet I made an advance that seemed more than just welcomed, almost asked for, but was politely refused. I misread the signals, obviously. That happens to all of us at some time or another. The lady was polite in her refusal, and I think that's the key. I think at some time or another we all will give signals that welcome an advance, but do so in error. When an advance comes that we don't want we can reject it, but doing so politely is key. It's simple common courtesy. If the person making the advance persist, then something stronger may be necessary. Again, common courtesy would be to desist when told to do so. It's all about treating people with respect. We're in this lifestyle to be sexually connected with others. Advances are generally, but not always, welcome and expected. We need to be polite and respectful in both our advances and rejections, whichever side we're on. Mr. Sexperimentors

FUCK going to the gym! - - Naw. But we do go to Gold's Bountiful. It's FULL of crazy sexy swingers so ya gotta bring yer "A" game and walk the walk. Otherwise you might as well just stay home and get high. [em]Emo_86[/em] [em]Emo_51[/em]