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Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - [quote=NAUGHTYGIRL101][quote=HARD_STONE][quote=EDANY0178]DVP? [/quote] I'll take either opening that I'm allowed in. [img]http://www.swingular.com/photos/h/HARD_STONE%7B19832287654f28ccd1ec598%7D.jpg[/img] [/quote] Uummm...i think this is one topic that "just average" would be an advantage...at least for us less experienced girls lol... [/quote]That scared me to sexy LOL
Psychology Research - I need help with a research project. - I would like to thank everyone who did the research survey for me. I hypothesized that non swingers would view us as more capable of deviant behavior like using drugs and alcohol in large amounts. I was correct. I hypothesized that swingers were more likely to use positive methods to handle relationship conflicts and I was also correct. I also hypothesized that swingers would have high openness to new things and high extroversion. We did find that swingers were more open to new experience but there wasn't enough on the other. Something we found interesting was that non swingers used more aggressive methods to solve relationship conflicts and they had high sexual depression. My teacher is talking about possibly working on this to get it published. I am beyond happy that I can show us in a better and more recent light. Thank you all for your help. If you have any question let me know.
Rules to hooking up - - Maybe we all ended up swingers because we don't play games. Sounds like everyone was as surprised by these revelations as we were. We are all here for the same thing, no need to dance around it.
Are you more or less tolerant? - - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]We think that in regards to your own appearance that you just cannot take the negativity that will be thrown your way too seriously. When we first formed this profile there was a group that threw parties that had a strict "undressed code" as to how you should look naked. A lot of people understandably got offended and there was a lot of banter and unfriendliness in the forums. We actually got several invitations, from some members of that group to join. We declined the invitations but we were surprised we were invited. For all the banter back and forth we would not have been welcome due to our age and or some sort of flaw in the body. Perhaps the exclusivity was the sell point and the members were more average than you would expect. Not that there is anything wrong with average. What the hell is average appearance anyway? Acceptance meant you were a notch above the rest in the eyes of the members as in the only true swingers. Does feeling sexy about yourself have to come at the expense of others? I do not know if that group still exist anymore. The founder fell in love and went monogamous last I knew. Well about that same time we submitted application as it were to join an older longer established group that puts together parties because we thought the parties looked like fun. About 60 days after our submission to join the group was sent we got back an e-mail declining our participation. We could get upset and lose time and joy wondering if we just were not sexy enough to be considered among the elite or we could just move on and know we were still going to find new and exciting people and adventures anyway. The real reasons for denial are only found within the person or persons that said no and if they have their reasons those same reasons do not make them bad people. I like to think that way at least. Mrs. Delicious just told me, as she was walking out the door to an appointment, that if they don't like her there must be something wrong with them. We can imagine until the cows come home and we will probably never guess right and it really does not matter anyway. I like to think the group, that told us no, is fun and is having fun but will just not know us. You cannot be part of everything anyway. The tendency for us to imagine that any group that might reject us is full of miserable losers that would not know sexy if it bit them is not good for us and the no was probably delivered with a lot less intolerance than we are imagining. I think we should concentrate on discovering more joy by fully focusing on the doors that are open to us. We are all going to get rejected from time to time and it might hurt but don't dwell on it. Opportunities to connect and to live and love surround us all.
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Well written my friend and as a single male in this lifestyle this is something that needs to be preached and practiced
Lifestyle after Death - What would you do? - If there were "TRUE" friends you damn right they would accept you if god forbid something happened to your wife/husband. We have a friend his wife died after having gastric bypass surgery. We all went to the funeral talk about solidarty but it was there for him,her family and their children. They were very strongly in the lifestyle and he is totally accepted by all us even if we don't chose to take a single man into our bedroom he was our friend when Christine was alive and he still is. We all get together about once a month have dinner go to a club just generally enjoy the company,and when I say we I speak about 2/3 of a yahoo group. I have come to find that friends within the lifestyle stick by you no matter what more so then friends who have known you long term. I believe its something about common ground we all share and the support network with the swingers lifestyle. Just my 2 cents *smile*
Becky and Jimmy
Hello summer - Swingers couple party - [quote=Gitterdone]Who said anything about an asset? What makes women's filters different than men? If I decide to identify as a female do I need to be sponsored? I'm asking because I'm sure more people would like to know. I have been to parties and I've seen both single males and couples get kicked out. Both sex's can be rowdy when alcohol and sex are involved. Are you talking about the aggressive instinctive behavior than men have? If so, there's a lot of guys there to put them in their place. I'm not a social bug and I'll sit in a corner and mind my own business and only talk when spoken to but thats my personality at any event.[/quote]
Probably better to just go back to my original answer... if you have to ask, you're probably the reason why...
What's the universal swinger signal? - How can you spot a swinger?? - [quote=CARRIERMAN]...How can you tell if someone is a Swinger?
"If you look over in the other bed, and see a man fucking your wife, while you're fucking his, there's a pretty good chance they're Swingers."[/quote]
Well, yeah, or your a vanilla straight guy that REALLY needs to cut back on the drinkin! :)
[quote=HELLO_KITTY12984]
As well as the purple tellytubby with the triangle on his head that carried the red purse. Apparently Spongebob and Patrick along with Burt & Ernie are ALSO gay lovers. Go figure. hahaha.[/quote]
OMG, did you just HAVE to go and bring back memories of TellyTubbies?? :)
I abso-freakin-lutely hated them things -- nothing to do with their color, just their general hugely irritating nature. And one of my kids just loved to watch them. If I'd-a had a nuclear warhead and specific coordinates for where they filmed that show......BAAMMM.....3rd world war!
Ooops....I'm off topic again....sorry.....I tend to do that. It's Kitty's fault. ;)
Why did you join Swingular? - Wondering what brings people here - Someone turned us on to the site, and we are trying to make new friends in the Tampa area. Lots of swingers here in Florida, and we look forward to meeting you.
R & C
need advice on getting the wife interested in the lifestyle - advice needed - Well If i did read it wrong and I dont feel I did. And she is Interested in thinking about joining you in the lifestyle, then maybe Take her to a couple of The Meet and Greets at Habits, Its a Open Bar (not everyone there are swingers) and let her meet some of the other couples and she how she feels about it.
This is something She needs to want to do, No do it becouse your into it. This is also something i feel you and Her Should not jump into, maybe meet and hang out with other couples. But never think about doing anything untell she is the one that shows the intrest. Take it slow, Take your Time and always let her tell you what she wants to do.
Thumper
Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - We think the problem is that people see the equation "sex = love". IOW, if I have sex with you, I must love you. Therefore polyamory and swinging are the same. After all, if I don't love you, I won't be having sex with you.
The way I see it, swinging is like a game of golf or tennis. I might play a game with you but I don't love you. Similarly, I might have sex with you but I don't love you.
Poly, IMO, is basically having a relationship with that other person and sex is involved on some level. Kinda like "I'm in love with you and oh, BTW, lets make love"
The way we see it, swinging is about exchanging sexual partners for recreation sex. In an orgy situation at a party, you can have sex with that person with zero words exchanged. In a poly relationship, there is a real connection going on besides just sex. Sex becomes incidental just like it is with married couples.
With swinging, there is no emotional attachment. Is that a good thing? Well, it depends. We need to understand the very simple nature of things. We do this to avoid that. That is human nature. Many swingers DON'T want emotional attachments and avoid them because of the complications they cause in the first one. Are there benefits to the attachments? You bet. Is there a price to pay for that benefit? But of course. Is it worth it to you? That depends on your viewpoint.
In our life as a couple, the problems poly cause BASED ON OUR OPINION (your's may vary and no right and wrong here) do not outweigh the payoff. IOW, we don't think the benefits of a poly relationship are worth the problems it creates based on our opinion. YMMV
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