Lafayette Swingers in Minnesota

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Facebook group - - I am an admin in a long-standing FB Swingers group for SouthEast Idaho and we're getting ready to close it down. It used to be there were privacy concerns where people who joined would risk exposing other members by sending friend requests to everybody but we were able to handle most of that by staying on top of things. Now, the FB rules and algorithm bots are going crazy. Posts from 2+ years ago are being randomly found and flagged. Posts from the admins are being flagged as well and we've been warned that if too many of these happen FB will shut the group down altogether. But this means two things; 1. the posts that make the page fun and free are all at risk of being auto flagged even though the group is private and 2. Even if a post is not flagged it's not truly private since the FB bots and possibly admins are scanning through everything that happens in every group. Really, the FB rule changes from 2 years ago make the group against their policy even by existing. The new rules read that a group cannot exist for the purpose of seeking or supporting the planning of any sexual activity. Because of all this, our group has been migrating to MeWe and all official posts/events/polls are now hosted there. We'll also be deleting FB content that is likely to be flagged and closing down the group.

Friend collectors or swingers - - Our post was not intended to offend anyone . Just because we chose to operate our account/profile differently then others does not make anyone more right or wrong. The purpose of our post was to try and develop some knowledge as to why some chose to operate differently. We understand that because our profile doesn’t show our faces, that means a friend request is necessary to determine attraction by exchanging pictures. We do this ourselves, all the time. But we also immediately delete accounts and typically inform those interested if we are not interested. It sounds like we are complaining but in reality we really aren’t. We just wanted to establish conversation and understanding. We have received a lot of friend request because of this post and we appreciate all of them but we are selective as well and we will not accept all of the request if we are not interested. I hope we continue to discuss this issue as we look forward to hearing other thoughts, ideas and suggestions.

Burnt out from searching - - [quote=ThroughTheVeil]Maybe the problem is that you're shooting too high? I mean, don't get me wrong, everyone has their preferences, and at the end of the day, you shouldn't do anything (or anyone) you don't want to, but were in a similar boat of having to reach out a lot and getting rejected, a lot... even after making quick contact (or even longer contact) with a couple. Now if we didn't care who we met up with, we'r would have a different couple every night we had free time and some to spare, so having standards is important for time management also. What I'm saying is, if you're frustrated with how little (quality) contact, maybe you should give more people the benefit of the doubt. I can think of couples that we initiated contact, 4 or 5 times before meeting, and then when we finally did, had a great time and became good friends, but that also meant reaching out to couples 6 or 7 times before realizing we were wasting our time swallowing our pride over them.[/quote] The Lord and Lady of the Veil (Vale?) make a very good point. We've found that MANY swingers (Ourselves included.) are somewhat predispositioned (Yes, I know that's not really a word.) to constantly be on the lookout for what we might consider the perfect or ideal couple/connection and thus ignore people we might actually end up having a fairly great connection with because they didn't check one of our boxes for things thought we were looking for. Far too often it's too easy to overlook a good or even great couple when searching for the perfect one (That might not actually exist!). How much great or even just good sex might we be passing up in the pursuit of perfect sex? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

How did you start the lifestyle? - - I was invited to be in a couple of amateur porn movies back in the 80's. It was after the first gang-bang scene that the cameraman gave me an issue of a swingers magazine. Did the whole thing with the PO box and snailmail. Which wasnt easy, even if you live and worked close to home. I was driving over the road, so meeting other swingers was almost impossible. Eventually the internet came along and sites like SDC, Fantasyswingers and Swingular made contacting people so much easier.

is it true about swingular??????????????????? - - lol, don't you just love rumors. That is completely untrue. In fact, it's just the opposite. Swingular is growing bigger and faster. First, the redesign of the site is going to be a huge milestone for us. We are getting closer and closer to the beta launch. Second, we are going city to city to market Swingular locally and expand in every market from small to big. As of right now, we are getting hundreds of sign ups a day. We are listed in the top 10 search results for most all keywords related to swingers and at least in the top 3 for about 5 of them. We have ads in and sponsor events such as SwingFest to help market ourselves worldwide and we are promoting parties across the U.S. We aren't going anywhere, we're here to stay!

why is it ! - - I think it's all or mostly about perspective, physical perspective. We get to see them having sex from a totally different angle. When we are involved we can't see the whole picture (or is that hole picture). We are also, caught up in the in the event as well. So when we see them in the throws of passion (since I'm such an illiterate schmuck, the word fucking would suffice) we have a different view and a different "perspective". If we are also, and at the sme time engaged with the guy's wife we may also get that little feeling of naughtiness added to the voyeuristic sense we experience. If we are truely swingers we have grown beyond the urge to pounce upon the other fellow since we conscienously, both husband and wife conscented and made the decission to have sex with others and placed jealousy in a trunk somewhere. So I really think it is a different perspective than we get when we have sex with them.

Young swingers party - sold out, who still wants to party ? - You mean it's an actual party? I thought it was like a political group who wanted to meet to strategize about how to get Justine Bieber and Harry Styles on the ballet in 2016. [em]Emo_89[/em]

swingin - thought this site was a swingers site - Classy not Trashy.........Perfect post. Thank you

Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - BICOU4BIF_FL, Again, your experience is unique to you. It's been our experience that very few single men have been "pushy" or disrespectful. It's different for all of us and doesn't justify anyone trying to foil every single males swinging life by campaigning against them as a whole. Intolerance is never justified. If you choose individually not to play with singles, then that is ok. We all have our preference. However, why try and bad mouth the entire group, in an attempt to demonize them to everyone else or to exclude them from social gatherings. If you invite people that are interested in single males to your parties, it will even things out. I think a lot of it has to do with insecurity. I have yet to see a married woman fuck a single male at a party without the her and husband's consent. Alton wrote: "but thats your opinion ,,you are right & we are wrong then again we are right & you are wrong,, it's funny, its a no win situation,lol" Thanks for validating my analogy for murder, abortion, marijuana or any other subject. If you say it's ok to be racist, because it's your opinion. Then it should be ok to murder, because it's your opinion. Your logic is flawed. ;-) -D-

I Have A Question - Poly vs. Open - We have friends in both of those communities and dip in and out of both but don't actually consider either what we have or want. Simply: Swinging is generally, ironically, too casual for us while also having way too many cultural rules (but we fucking love your parties), We also find that while we have fun with and enjoy the company of a lot of swingers, most are culturally pretty different from us. Polyamory, as people play it, is typically far too intense for us and that community also has a lot of cultural strictures and high expectations (but we've had great parties there, too, and have made really close friends, even though we're not into Star Wars 😜). So we look for genuine friends, because that's how it started and that's how it's always been with us. We're as likely to go to coffee than get naked. And our lives are crazy busy, so we don't have a lot of time to give. But we each go out with someone probably once a week. That said, it's not necessarily the same person and actually getting together for a night out, rather than coffee or lunch, probably only happens twice a month each at most. Once a month is more common. We don't really have rules. That's kind of antithetical to how our relationship works in general. Instead, we spend focused time with each other. We go to coffee together once a week. We go to lunch together once a week. And we go out together once a week. We plan that on Saturday over coffee or ok a run. We also talk constantly. We've always been completely open with each other. Having a mutually wanted and understood open relationship makes transparency easy for us. We also like to inevitably introduce anyone were seeing regularly to each other. We also don't pry at all but like to be sure the other person's spouse or primary partner is good and that they're relationship is healthy. It sounds a lot like what people call polyamory except that it stays casual. For that reason, the other people need to realize that's all it will ever be. The flip side to that is making sure we only get involved with grounded and reliable people. We've been doing it long enough that we both have a whole set of friends we might go out with on and off. For us, regardless of their jobs, they're often artistic, musical, literary, dancers, etc..