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What about the lifestyle didn't meet your expectations? - Preconceptions and disappointment. - I'm home bored, so stop here if you don't want to read a bunch of shite. lol. I think we both entered the lifestyle with some preconceived notions of what the people in the LS would be like, but that was mostly from our limited experience with being vanilla and having LS peeps try to hit on us. It just seemed creepy, desperate and gross at the time. We assumed most of the players would be super aggressive, ready to fuck anyone and have zero interest in relationships outside of sex. Our initial entry was simply to watch and be watched. We quickly learned that there are just as many wonderful people in the LS as out of it. Maybe more. There will always be the outliers, the few percentage on each end of the spectrum that are more extreme, but that happens in any population. Overall, it was a happy surprise. So that would be a negative expectation that wasn't met. As far as things we were hoping would happen or expectation that weren't met, we have very few. But we also went into the labyrinth without really expecting or assuming anything. I don't think we were naive enough to think that this segment of the population was somehow immune from the social characteristics that reveal themselves in any other social class or group. You will always have the "cool kids" the "shy people" the "jocks" the "geeks" the people who classify themselves as the "pity party" and blame the world for their problems. Those things will exist anywhere and should. Swingers are a diverse group of people with a few, maybe very few, common goals. Those goals I think are to meet others with social deviancy and those interested in expanding their sexual experiences or simply to meet new friends. Swinging, in itself, doesn't solidify your beliefs in anything else (politics, food preferences, choice of travel location, or even how or what you are looking for as swingers). I think that is where expectations can fail. If a person goes into a situation thinking, "I/we think "x" so everyone else must think "x" as well", they are bound to be disappointed. I've said this a lot of times, the lifestyle is not black and white. Life isn't black and white. There will be frustrations around every turn if you allow yourself to be duped into thinking your way of thinking is more than just your viewpoint, that it is universal to everyone. I see people complaining of flakes, people who meet once then run away, etc. That's how they roll. That's their truth. It's what they are comfortable with or wanting and who am I to judge. That being said, I don't have to associate with them and hopefully learn how to avoid that situation or become more efficient at finding people with similar interests. The lifestyle is work. Sometimes a lot of work. I think it's foolish to think that it should be easy to find 4 people who all jive. Think about how many people you have dated before settling on the right one for you. And to assume that somehow changes in the lifestyle and that after chatting on kik for a few weeks then meeting over drinks will somehow magically connect you. Ugh. Sometimes it happens. Sometimes not. But I wouldn't expect it. For others, the thought of any connection past the one-nighter is absurd. Why would you want to make friends with your fuck-buddies? It may be too risky and cause too many emotions. Point is, we are all different and that is what makes the journey so beautiful. And, just a note about flakes, since it is a recurrent theme. Yes, maybe there are more flakes in the lifestyle, but I'm guessing it's specifically related to the nature of the LS. Swinging for some can be very intimidating and frightening. Sometimes the chase is much more fun than the fucking. Not excusing them that do flake, it seems a problem for sure, but I think I understand, at least in part, why it happens so much. There is so much social pressure not to be in the lifestyle and most were brought up without it being the normal way to live. So society is telling us we are wrong, gross, deviant, etc. Add to that the fear of actually getting naked and fucking someone else and it can cause a lot of anxiety in some. When we first started we were petrified to even go the parties thinking it was going to be a fuck/rape fest. lol. Turned out we were wrong but it was a learning process. Lastly, if you are already treading carefully and the couple/person you are supposed to be meeting gives off any bad vibes, maybe flaking is best. It's hard not to hurt someone's feelings and honesty isn't always what happens. I know we have been honest with couples and it turned into a shit-show. Why don't you like us? If you only meet us and give us a chance we can prove we are wonderful. Other's like us, why don't you. It's hard to be honest at times about why there isn't a connection. May flaking be a way to spare feelings? I don't know. There are probably a plethora (Hefe, do you know what a plethora is?)of reasons people flake and some of those my be that they are just douches. But likely there are other people that aren't and are just trying to get out of a situation they are unfamiliar with. Avoid the douches but maybe give those others a second chance. Evil: always good topics you bring to the table. So you think because people like sex they should be good at it? I know a lot of people who love food but suck at cooking. haha. Maybe having too many options on the table can also make people lazy. I don't have to try hard if I know tomorrow is another partner. To some it's the quantity and not the quality. But I can see why the expectation would be there. All in all we really have no complaints. It's been a fascination journey. Some ups, some downs, but always and adventure. We will keep our expectations low, both of ourselves and those around us. Less disappointment that way. I'm going back to sitting in my underwear, drinking a beer and watching TV. Zero expectations. haha. :) Mr. SRO

Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - [quote=TNT4FUN2][quote=RLF1234][quote=TNT4FUN2]A Yugo and 74 AMC Pacer.[/quote] Hey we got the same cars. [/quote] Sounds like a party![/quote] You know we can fit 6 people in the Yugo. 3 in the front and 3 in the back (ouch!)

another club under fire - club in peoria - [quote=NAUGHTYGIRL101][quote=CARRIERMANANDGEEKGIRL]Obviously, the Peoria city fathers have never heard of the Constitution. #1. - It's a PRIVATE club, which means it's not open to the general public. #2. - Nothing that happens inside is within view of the general public. #3. - The club's proximity to the police station has NOTHING to do with ANYTHING. #4. - Swinging and/or swapping partners is NOT illegal. It will be really interesting to see what the exact wording of the ordinance is. It will also be laughable. [b]FLASH:[/b] "Consenting adults arrested for having consensual sex behind closed doors." Film at 11:00.[/quote] I always forget how spoiled ya'll in Florida are...Constitution or not they can and will shut this place down...look at Utah...we have NO swingers clubs and as of now Ogden has no strip clubs...talk about conservative...oh wait, I DON'T LIVE IN UTAH ANYMORE...roflmao I keep forgetting that lol[/quote] North Las Vegas: Sin City's official annex. lol

Why the male side of Couples are here...? - I will admit I am hoping to spark some heated debate on this.... - [quote=EVILDOERS][quote=CPL4SOFT]Because every time the female half gets on all she gets is here's a pic of my cock, want to fuck? [/quote] At the risk of further pizzing off a few of the single dudes around here... That's because a fair number of guys assume that since you're swingers (i.e. you "allow" your partner to fuck other men) you must by default be a cuckold. It's bullshit and it unfairly affects the single guys who DON'T assume that married male swingers are all cucks (or won't openly admit it-lol). To be fair, we've run into more than a few married guys who feel this way too. They're easy to pick out because they say up front their lady doesn't fuck other guys or they try to bait and switch you after you meet. Exactly... Bty EvilDoers, you guys are awesome! We laughed so hard reading your profile! Xoxo!

UTAHFUNFRIENDS - - [quote=EVILDOERS][quote=DANDTCURIOUS][quote=utahfunfriends]A female friend and I will be hitting up Park City and looking to meet open minded singles for fun.... I’m new to the area, and wondering if there are any recommended Lifestyle bars or clubs?[/quote] Hmmm, you’re on a swingers site asking about where to meet single people 🤔[/quote] Shhhh! He's gonna realize that very fact in about three...two...one...actually he probably won't. Nevermind. [/quote] 🤣😂🤣

Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - 2011 Victory Red.... V6 6 Speed.... Bought off show room floor specifically without the decal racing stripe.

Why do they run? - Why do most couples run when you suggest a real full swap? - Yes, some responses do seem to be a bit \"hostile\" as someone put it...(and I\'m sure mine is about to sound the same)...but maybe that is because they may have felt attakced by the originator saying they must be insecure. How about instead of judging the \"security\" of a couple by saying, \"they must be insecure if they don\'t want to do this...\" consider that there are as many ways to swing as there are swingers. Yes, some people develop their boundaries based on \"insecurities\", others simply because of what they like and desire. We just aren\'t in this to go off and play around with other people, this is something we share and enjoy together. If you are into that, that\'s fine, but don\'t judge others because they aren\'t.

Have Diapers...will travel. - Funny, not so funny...the Love Triangle from Space. - I just want to know how the things she had packed up (along with the pepper spray) were going to be used - this was one smart USAF/NASA trained lady so she had to have some great plan to make use of it all. If she would have only been a swinger the triangle thing would have been much less of a problem :-) Swingers In Space ". . . .or would you like swing on a star . . . ." Max

Disneyland swingers - - Check out the tiki bar in Disneyland hotel. A lot of hook up there. I will be there next week but not October 4-7.

swing parties information - Meet and Greet - Looking for a swingers club or private swingers party in the Chattanooga area whenever one will be happening. Any information would be greatly appreciated. You can leave me information on here or my own e-mail address at destinytw at hotmail dot com. Thanks, Tammy