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Anyone going to the BNL concert? - Wendover, Feb 13th - I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that many swingers are probably fans of Barenaked Ladies (and not because of the name of the band... it's just that we've never met a BNL fan fan we didn't like. =)
Anyone else making the trip for the show?
Swingers - a couples only lifestyle? - Are singles considered to be swingers? - The above comments are very interesting, and do promote thinking about how it all began.
I grew up during the time when 'swapping' was just starting to catch hold. Swappers were married couples, and they did indeed swap partners. Single people were called 'swingers' at that time as they had many partners for sex. Basically singles did not have a steady relationhship with just one partner. An unmarried couple could be swingers, as they could go their separate ways at any time. A married couple did not easily have the option to go separate ways, so they remain swappers unless they got a divorce. Keep in mind that the two terms applied only to those that actively sought out new sex partners, and did not apply to the population in general.
Over time, perhaps about 1965-1969, the word 'swapper' became a bit derogatory, so the married ones adopted the word 'swinger' as it seemed to be more lively and exciting sounding. Thus they moved into word usage territory of the singles. Today both singles and couples share the word.
The meaning of words and their application change over time in the America language. As an example, the word 'Queer' changed to 'Fag' and later to 'Gay'. It took from about 1940 until about 1988 for the word 'queer' to evolve into 'gay'. It's still the same people, just a different word has been adopted that sounds more happy and exciting.
To say a single man looking to get laid is not a swinger, but a single lady looking to get laid is a swinger is totally wrong. Both are either horney, or both are swingers. There can be no distinction between the two.
So, where does that leave us? Today both singles and married couples share the word equally. That is, unless the American language is evolving again. Perhaps the word 'Humming Bird' (going from flower to flower for nectar) will become the singles new description.
Advice - Advice for a new couple venturing out - You might consider starting here....
Say Yes To Swinging - this is the book you want the read if you think Swinging might be something you would like to try. Includes information about how to discuss the topic with your partner.
Let's Go Swinging - this is the book you want to read once you decide to become swingers.
Both books are available on Amazon for $6 in Kindle format.
How has swinging made your marriage better? - - Communication (REAL communication) is the key but still it's not enough if someone really wants to stray or outright leave. There's been an interesting discussion on another swing site we're on about some of this topic and an old timer on there (who's now divorced) brought up something that we found interesting and that seems to be fairly ubiquitous in the lifestyle. It turns out that most women who have been in the lifestyle for a decent length of time have at one time or another (multiple times for Ms. Evil and some of the ladies we've known for some time) been told by a play partner (more often by a single male or even more often a vanilla guy...lot's of swingers seem to get a thrill out of vanilla hunting I guess) that if they were THEIR partner they would NEVER share them with another man. Think about that for a minute. With the way most women are raised and the messages society pounds into their heads about love, romance, fidelity, etc., how powerful are those words are. In fact let's take a little poll. Are there any women who've been in the lifestyle for, say, at least 5 years and play fairly frequently who have never had a guy tell them or insinuate that? Just curious.
Swinger Friendly Businesses - Business or services friendly to swingers - LOL
Black Ring, Right Hand - How to tell if someone's a swinger - Don't underestimate the power of the internet and social media to disseminate information (especially information considered salacious by most of the world) VERY quickly. All it would take would be one pissed off swinger who didn't get laid or something to lash out by telling everyone the dirty little secret. [em]Emo_84[/em]
And personally we don't find it very inhibiting to walk into a bar or a restaurant and not be able to tell immediately who is and isn't a swinger. It would be interesting to poll people and ask them if they would be likely to wear a black ring on their right hand in otherwise vanilla situations to be able to be identified by and to identify others as swingers. We'll start. We wouldn't do it. We enjoy the fact that our little hobby is known just to us and a few friends. It's our naughty little secret. We wouldn't advertise our vanilla sex life to friends and family so why would we want to do it as swingers? JOHO
Swingers In Uniform - Pay your memorial day respects here. - Um, Red Hun.
I completely get all the points in your post but the one thing that that jumped under my skin, is the statement that this Don Juan asshole is a "fucking" Democrat based on his fucked up views. My husband (and others in my family) serve(d) in the military too and WE ARE DEMOCRATS. Being one, I do not agree with the shit he said in his post and it serves him right for the backlashing that he received for what he said. I completely support our our troops and is very grateful for what they did and are still doing. I also know plenty of Dem. who feel the same way I do, just as I know a few Rep. who has that dickwads same point of view. But to place him in our category in such a derogative way, offends me. Its like saying "Oh shit, you smell like a wet dog when you get out the shower...You must be white" or "Damn, your nose is big...You must be black". See how offensive that is. Not to spark a heated thing in this positive thread, I just wanted to let you know. Now back to our regularly scheduled thread...lol
Plain and simple...We don't wanna claim him....try pushing his ass off onto another group... :p
Where on Earth are all the hot Virginia Swingers? - Show us what you have to offer VA!!! - here is one for you...
US based Hedo-Like Resort - Could there be one in the US? - So, why has no one built such a resort in someplace like Vegas, Florida,
They built in Florida... more that 20 years ago.
--> http://www.paradiselakes.com/
Paradise Lakes is 90% swingers and well know in our area as such. The only difference between this place and Hedo is sand..... and we hate sand.
Alaska Swingers - - Wife swappers in Alaska? That's crazy talk. Everyone knows that little old Mormon Utah is where all the swingers are.
I'm sure there are plenty of swingers in Alaska. Just a matter of finding them. Check out other swing sites. Most are geographically biased. You can also try Craigslist as many peeps go there to find like minded people to swap with. Good luck.
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