Saint Lucas Swingers in Iowa

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Finding a balance - Swinging and Religion - - This has always been a tough controversy. Religion, swinging. I am agnostic and my GF was LDS. Her family is hardcore LDS still and pushed the faith on their daughter (my GF) and her kids even. They preach that they want their whole family in the religion cuz they need to know "right from wrong". I asked the kids (8 & 6 yrs old) what they learn in church.. seems to me all they learn about is how great their "savior" is, how he loves us, and we can look to him, and family is a "unit".. they dont seem to learn anythign about right and wrong. Yet.. her parents try to preach to me that their religion teaches them right from wrong and that their "right & wrong" is the correct one. They are also very controlling, judgemental, pushy, 2-faced, and negative in every aspect... OMG! is this what u learn in church and how family is supposed to be?? They found out we swing, and told me its adultry and we're cheating and its immoral.. OK, umm.. we;re not married and what we do is 100% consentual... funny, but seems like the more LDS we meet, the more seem to be JACK mormons. so why are LDS swinging or why are swingers in religions that condem it? is it just for the prestige and status of being in the church and to shut the family up?? Ok, #1, I hate ppl who follow a faith and feel theirs is the correct one so much that they push it on everyone and judge other beliefs as the wrong ones rather then understanding tolerance and the fact that there is no such thing as right or wrong... only opinion and difference... what works for you may not work for me. #2, I hate hypocrates. ppl who preach about how much they follow their religion, go to church and lie in front of everyone there about how much they follow the rules and how the church has saved them.. Then, behind closed doors, they go against everything they believe in. Then they preach about how much they follow their churches rules and its "right & wrong" is the ultimate. Those ppl are called liars and 2-facers.. #3, Kids should be taught "Right & Wrong" from their parents, not a group of ppl that i described in examples #1 & #2. WTF do they know?? Kids should also be introduced to church by their own choice and when they are old enuf to understand it. [b]In my opinion, If you wanna swing, then it doesnt seem like u really believe in ur church's beliefs... why are u in it? If u believe ur church's teachings above all.. then why are you swinging?[/b] [b]I have nuthing against either, but I think its best to pick a side. Thats why I dont follow any religion.. I dont believe in any of them... too many hypocrates, liars, 2-facers, judgemental, stuck-ups... people who are willing to bend and cheat their own rules, morals and beliefs behind closed doors and especially when its to their benefit...[/b]

Polyamory - polyanorous couples. - [b]By general definition all swingers are polyamorous.[/b] Polyamory (from Greek ???? [poly, meaning many or several] and Latin amor [love]) is the practice, desire, or acceptance of having more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved. Polyamory is a less specific term than polygamy, the practice or condition of having more than one spouse. The majority of polygamous cultures are traditionally polygynous, where one husband has multiple wives. Polyandrous societies, in which one wife has multiple husbands, are less common but do exist. Marriage is not a requirement in polyamorous relationships.

asking your swinger friend if you can join them. - - Honestly, a lot of people here are being negative about single men. Don't let it make you feel like you are a leper. A lot of couples seek out single men. Everyone has their own preferences. If your friend confided enough in you to tell you that he and his spouse were swingers he obviously is open enough with you to not be upset you asked something like that. What exactly are you looking/interested in doing with her(them potentially)? Threesome, voyeurism, DP, DVP, or are you just wanting to take his wife alone for an evening of some great swingers sex lol?

Las Vegas Swingers club - - Thank you!

Now that you're one of them there fancy swingers... - - I play as a single male (although sometimes I bring a vanilla swirl along to an event or something) but I've always had good experiences with people I meet up with. I have also had nothing but good experiences at parties, so I guess I'm pretty lucky that way. For me, the lifestyle hasn't exactly turned me into a sex snob or anything like that, but I have gotten used to the open attitudes. It has become much harder (and not in the good way) to play with vanilla females who don't have those same attitudes. Not in the sense of I'm coming on too strong or pushing boundaries harder, but just that "normal" attitudes towards sex and sexual exploration in the LS are different than those in the single scene.

Sexuality - Where does it come from? - - I, personally, don't think you can change your orientation, it is something that is developed in childhood, and you are not aware until you become an adolescent. I knew I was a bisexual in my teens, and even though I primarily was with women, I always had the desire to be with a man. That desire has never gone away. Now, as an adult, I have learned that I can be with both a man and a woman, and be sexually satisfied. The sexual satisfaction is obviously different, but, it is very exciting. It is wonderful to be able to explore your sexuality freely, and bisexuals are very open-minded individuals. Again, this is my opinion. I have lived a good sexual life, for the most part, and right now is the best time. I have a wonderful woman, who accepts me for who I am, and loves to see my bi side in action. We have met some wonderful swingers, and would not change anything. Ron

Mormons - - Evil, we agree. We want to believe that therr is a gene or a doctorine in the BoM that creates hot swingers, but this is a dead thread. Mormons are no more likely to be swingers than anyone else.

Here's something Ive been curious about - - Congrats on 10 years in the lifestyle, SLOW. We're old timers as well and have been doing this off and on since shortly after we got married. Over 25 years now! So I guess I can sort of see both points of view and contrary to the current rather negative societal attitude towards political correctness I have no trouble being firmly on the side of being kind to people and not labeling or belittling anyone regarding their participation in the lifestyle. Having said that, however, I can also see the viewpoint of some couples since when we first started swinging there really were no singles (or at least so few that we never met any) actively participating in the lifestyle. A few years later we met a few singles who would, say, hire a hooker to gain access to parties and events or sometimes convince a friend to act as sort of a swinging "beard" if you will, again to gain entry to swinging events. This was all pre-internet so connecting was considerably more difficult than it is now. To say that the internet changed swinging (for better or worse) is a HUGE understatement. I was talking to a guy (formerly single but now in a couple) recently about his experiences as both a SM and a couple in the lifestyle. His attitude had actually changed dramatically. It reminded me of former smokers who now are militantly anti-smoking. His argument (now that he's no longer single) was to take the couples and the singles and put them on separate websites and what do you have? He said you have a swingers site and a hookup site. I told him that there are some couples who actually seek out singles over other couples but he wasn't easily dissuaded. One final point he made that I thought perhaps was a valid point...he said when he first started out as a SM in swinging he thought that all or most of the married guys who enjoyed seeing their wives getting fucked were basically cuckolds or at very least not real men. He said it took him many years and a lot of different experiences to lose that mindset. He also said that now that he's part of a couple who is frequently contacted by single guys he sees that attitude (because he recognizes it from when he had it) far more often than not. He stated that he would guess that the VAST majority of those single guys who don't "get it", the bad apples if you will, the ones who ruin it for the few good guys have that attitude and mindset. He said that's why there will probably always be somewhat of a schism between singles and couples. Whew, that was a long fucking post. Hope it made sense. No more herb before posting, Mr. Evil! LOL

Swingers circle - Whats with them - We went to a Halloween party paid to get in and there was supposed to be alcohol and food, we got there 30min after it started and the bar was dry, with a promise of someone was on a run to get more but more never came.

Friday Hangouts? Moose... Nightshade??? - Looking for Fun Friday Outing - We have been to Moose Lounge a few times but its been a few months. Usually have fun. Definitely more fun with a larger group of "stylers" there. It is an interesting mix of "swingers" and younger gay/bi/straight people but they all mix well and makes things kind of fun and interesting. Just curious if people from here still go to Moose or if there is a new better spot.