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Chat - - Same for us, even lesser people in the chatbox. We were always the only ones. Come on swingers, where are you???
Are we really as judgmental as vanilla people? - - [i][b]In answer to the OP, YES. Swingers are just as judgemental if not more so than the vanilla people that we live with. The Lifestyle is just a smaller version of the regular world. And because there are less people in it, it may actually seem like the predjudices are more pronounced. All you can really do, is the same thing that you'd do in regular society...try to avoid the assholes.
Cinnamon[/b][/i]
Black Rings - Do Swingers really? - Black rings on the ring finger of the right side hand is definitely a sign of being a swinger. Some women also wear anklets with different charms showing their preference for play (mfm, mfmf, BBC,etc). Now there is an international emblem for swingers worn in various forms of jewelry.
https://www.swingersjewelry.net/swinger-symbol/
Why do they run? - Why do most couples run when you suggest a real full swap? - I am certain that insecurity has no bearing on the decisions that we make in regard to the lifestyle. What you are suggesting simply isnt for us. We take so much from being in close proximity to each other during our encounters that it would render the experience...perhaps ackward or fruitless, for lack of a better term.
There is a reason that so many couples run from the possibility of what you call \"full swap\". Many years ago when we were first introduced to the lifestyle, \"full swap\" entailed having sexual intercourse with another couple. \"Soft swap\" meant oral play or touching only, no intercourse. Perhaps the deffinition has changed over the years...
I am certain that what you are describing is closer to what traditional polyamory is all about. In fact, there is a reason why the couples that you approach about this subject \"run like the wind\" as you call it. More times than not, it has proven to be destructive to the relationships in question. Best intentions or not, we are all human. Shit happens. Most seasoned swingers know this, and avoid this situation at all costs.
Most of the relationships that we have seen over the years that were as you describe ended in ruin. Most of the people that we have known to consider this method were (coincidentally) new swingers, who had not yet developed a sense of direction or an identity in the lifestyle. There are some mistakes that you can make in the lifestlye without jeopadizing your standing with your mate. There are some that you simply can not. What you are suggesting to other couples, while it may seem like something that would be fun and cool, has proven to be atleast problematic to many other people.
Just our .02 cents.
Best of luck to you both.
Luvbugs! (mR.)
:D
Drink of choice - - Thanks you sexy swingers! Love the advice and the information.
Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - We would be interested. Safety is important to us. We're brand new to the LS and we want to proactively get vaccines and tests to show our safety if we can find other couples that can prove theirs
Kik group for UT swingers. - Contact me if your interested in joining a KIK group for Swingers - [quote=PARTYINLV]We have been on many kik chat groups in the past. But, we have never been on one as good as this one. There are lots of funny conversations and sexy things going on. There is even talk of setting up parties.[/quote]
It’s a good time everyday!!
seniors - why is it so difficult to find senior swingers or single ladies? - KITTYWOO,
I don't think you can generalize people by locale. Political position also has nothing to do with tact. Both Dems and Reps can "mud sling" and both can be vulgar. You can't say that all southern people are well-mannered and cordial, after all they still have the highest levels of open racism in their states, to include forms of self-imposed segregation. We know first hand, we moved from the south to Utah. A year in the South Carolina (An Uber Republican State), we saw racism, like we've never seen it. Does that mean all Southern people are ignorant racists??? No, just as it means that not all are good well mannered, polite individuals. The same applies to the more liberal states. Locale has absolutely nothing to do with it. Thinking like that... generalizing... sterotyping is what breeds hate and intolerance.
Using these forums as an example; most people that claim that they are above the mud slinging, name calling or other social taboos, are a regular source of it. They are the first to critisize everyone they interact with, yet pull no punches and often hypocritically violate the rules they try to impose on everyone. I've learned that there are a lot of people here that like to dictate to others what swinging and social interaction should be, yet they do not wish to be generalized or categorized within those confines.
Regarding the subject of this thread... I think that if you have an attractive quality a "draw" and there is someone available that is draw to said quality, then you will be successful. We all have factors which attract or repel others. Unfortunately, sometimes this is age. Just as it maybe financial means, material possessions, breast implants, flawless skin, sense of humor or a million other things... We just have to keep our bait out their and someone will bite.
-Don-
From UT? - So many from Utah - Utah isn't what people think it is
Best kept secret in the states....
I must say I am amazed as to how many swingers there really are in this state.
not just on the site, just noticeably as we go out
come play with us up in utah one day mina :)
Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - Posted By: XPLORR94248 Reply posted on:
Nov 10, 2007 - 12:11 pm
Poly people generally take issue with swinging as be strictly recreational SEX! and no love where as poly, supposedly, is love based not necessarily any sex....but sex usually is involved at some level. The attitude is that swinging is not a good thing that swinging is diametrically opposed to poly.
So while there are some similarities in swinging and poly in that more and more swingers are looking for relationships, i.e., "friends with benefits" ; "Friends in and out of the bedroom". These friendships are based on attraction and sex after the attraction. Poly people take the concept that poly is based on loving someone and if sex happens then OK, but that love is the key and sex is at best secondary.
I would say that swinging (full swap, soft swap) IS recreational sex. It ISN'T about falling in love with someone. That poly people would think swinging is bad because it is diametrically opposed to poly doesn't surprise me one bit. Kinda like me being a Grand Dragon of the KKK thinking that people who even can think of having a relationship with a black person are sick in the head. To a poly person, the only difference between them and a "normal" person is that they have more than one person with whom they have love in the relationship. "Normal" people also think spouse swapping is a bad idea too. Again, no surprise.
I would say that swinging and poly have only one similarity and that is that they are having sex with somebody that they are not legally married to and the spouse is fine with it. Beyond that, I don't see the similarities.
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