Cornell Swingers in Illinois

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Soft-core roll call - A call out to those interested in the softer side. - [quote=PARTYINLV]Canvas, It sounds like you and your wife are not quite on the same page yet, which is quite normal at the beginning of exploring the Lifestyle. You are looking for friendships with those who are in a similar situation. That's a good idea, but be prepared that even those friendships may be fleeting as the chemistry or level of comfort may still be different. At the beginning of our lifestyle journey, my wife and I were just as you are today, (I was also at a different level as my wife too). TheFunCouple offers excellent advice on going to meet & greets. I also add that you might want to check out a place like Sea Mountain Inn in Palm Springs. There you can see how comfortable it is to be nude in front of others and witness all the different levels of the lifestyle. You will have opportunities to talk to others and learn more. There is no pressure to play. Plus, you will be out of Utah and away from people who might recognize you. If you are adventurous enough, maybe plan a vacation to Temptations Resort in Mexico. This resort is not truly a lifestyle resort but is a lifestyle friendly resort since so many non swingers go there. It still is a sexually charged resort. You will meet a lot of people who are similar to you there and you have a whole week to be relaxed, get into vacation mode, and explore your steps into the lifestyle together without judgement or pressure.[/quote] Thanks. I'm totally fine with my wife not wanting to be with another man. And she's ok with me being comfortable with another woman. So, not being on the same page doesn't cause issues as much as it adds to the challenges. Any way, I completely agree with you and TheFunCouple about meeting people in person, going to meet-and-greets, etc. That would be the best way to meet and get a feel for people. Two problems with that for us though: 1) We live in Podunk i.e., a long ways from Lifestyle events and 2) neither of us likes parties or any sort of large social gatherings. We're not hermits or socially awkward. It's just not our thing. I appreciate your post as well as the others.👍

Secret Swingers Club Ogden, UT - Clubs - Friday nights are lifestyle friendly. This Friday is Steampunk theme. Haven't seen tomorrow's password yet. Password just gets your cover waved. I think we'll be there tomorrow.

Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - i don't like anyone lol..

Anyone been to a Vegas Perfect Touch party? - - A few months ago we went to Vegas. We stayed at Rumors Hotel which is across the street from the HARD ROCK CAFE....this is where the meet n greet that we saw on the main page. Though we wanted to go by the time we did all the other things we were to tired to go. However, We saw tons and tons of people being dropped off both Friday and Saturday night. They were all going to a party in the same club as the meet n greet. Very sexy people if you asked me....tons of them. Not sure if they were all swinger or club promotions that you will find people passing out on the strip. Either way it was happening group of people. We did go swimming at Rehab in The Hard Rock and that in itself told us we were in the right place.....Tons of sexy people.....So would be worth a fun night on the dance floor. So next time we will go for sure and not plan so much at that time so we can go to the club too....So I would check it out and actually find the host....that way she can point you in the right direction and I am sure there will be tons of swingers as well. Sin City indeed!!!!

does anyone else go through periods of doubt? - as to whether this lifestyle is what they want? - This is a 'lifestyle' and there are many different types of people in it. The definition of a swinger has changed drastically and the description you provided still falls into that definition. A lot of people choose this lifestyle because of it's openness and sexual energy. You don't have to have sex with everyone you meet to be a swinger or be in the lifestyle. Selectivity is a virtue and you have the right. Most swingers rarely hook up with others until they find the 'right' situation. But that doesn't make you less of a swinger than those who do every weekend. Remember, to each his own!

Hall pass - - InvestigatingKink, it looks like we have been in the LS (lifestyle) about the same time, less than a year. Everyone has different needs and weaknesses in their marriage, and I certainly don't judge what other people do, at least not ethically. We were at a party just last night and talking to several couples who have been in the LS for a lot of years. We were discussing this very subject. They all had stories of people who started playing separately and most of those couples are now divorced. Their belief is that it is often very difficult on marriages and definitely not for the majority of swingers. Now all of you hall pass and open marriage people, don't get freaky on me. This is just speculation on my part and opinion of those I talk to. There are many I'm sure it works great for. I believe the LS can be seriously hard on your marriage if you are not in prime shape. We ourselves have had struggles just doing what we do (as I think everyone has had at some point) so to add more uncertainty to the situation would be tough. Also, to us (again, not judging) this is about a journey we are taking together. I like to watch her interact with people and be flirted with and she enjoys the same. If we were not together it feels as if we have moved on to something different. But we are probably rare. Our name alone, SameRoomOnly, should give you and idea of our ideals. I know this is going to sound crazy, but we aren't in the LS just to fuck a bunch of people. We truly enjoy the fun people, making friends and experiencing new things together. An analogy could be made to travel. We both love to travel. But if we started taking separate vacations all of the time, it wouldn't be as enjoyable. Hawaii is wonderful if I am there alone, but if she is with me, it makes the experience so much better. I want her to share in my experiences. Last thing is that we communicate together, almost always. It isn't that we are jealous of what a person says to either on of us, but we like to know what is being said, as a team. It keeps us honest and open and prevents us from having to recap any conversations. We trust each other completely, but we also realize that anyone can mess up and by putting yourself in a situation that could potentiate cheating or dishonesty doesn't seem wise to us. I'm sure some of you will want to interject and say "well, you two must not trust each other. We never worry about things like that. We love each other too much." Maybe so. But our opinion is that when you start to spend alone time with another person, talking freely about whatever the subject may be and are fucking that person, well...it seems dangerous. It's just like when I am at work. If a girl flirts with me or gets too close, I make sure to tell my wife and keep her updated and I also try to distance myself from that person. Not that I plan on cheating, but we are all human and have weaknesses. And by always being honest and open it helps to keep our marriage strong. So, maybe the truth is that we are just not secure enough in our relationship to do something like hall passes or an open marriage, or maybe the truth is that everyone who tries it will fail miserably and end up divorced. It probably is somewhere in the middle of that spectrum, as most things are. Few things are black or white. But we wouldn't entertain the idea of a consistent hall pass. Maybe once, or twice, just to experience it, but an ongoing thing, no way. Good luck with whatever you decide. Mr. SameRoomOnly

Black Ring, Right Hand - How to tell if someone's a swinger - [quote=EVILDOERS]We used to go to the occasional lifestyle takeover/trip and would invariably be issued a wristband upon arrival so that we could get into events at the hotel or resort. It usually took about half a day for word to leak out, first among hotel employees and then later the general public, that swingers were around the area and that they could be identified by their wristbands.[/quote] When swingers are densely populated in an area.. yes.. that's bound to happen.. However, a tiny fraction of the population are actually swingers.. so when you're talking about something "in the wild" (versus at a meet-up), this isn't likely to be a problem. [quote=EVILDOERS]I guarantee if the black ring thing took off that very soon there would be multiple internet stories as well as likely regular news outlets that "swingers" wear black rings on their right hands and there goes any anonymity. The VAST majority of swingers would then not dare wear the accessory for fear of being seen/identified in public as a swinger.[/quote] I'd say we're years (decades?) away from that ever becoming a problem. Black rings would need to be EVERYWHERE before the general populace catches on to it... and then you just move on to something else. [quote=EVILDOERS]MUCH easier to just attend private swinging events where you have a reasonable assurance that all or most in attendance are indeed swingers rather than spend a lot of time cruising the bars or whatever looking for people wearing black rings. [em]Emo_67[/em] [/quote] I'm not sure which part of the black-ring suggestion takes "spending a lot of time"... Attending meetups is DEFINITELY the preferred way to find swingers (well, and web-sites, like this one)... But talking to people who've actually seen the black-ring in the wild and MET swingers in open, public, spaces... there's a certain excitement that comes from that. Maybe I'll just wear my "I swingers" t-shirt, instead. ;)

Daybreak - Is the Daybreak area a hot spot for people in the LS? - I was talking to someone the other day and they mentioned that the Daybreak area in South Jordan has a lot of swingers since the houses are close together and you can easily walk around. Can anyone validate if there is any truth to this?

Stabbing at swingers party? - - A stabbing in Herriman over the weekend has the media reporting it was a "swingers party". I am assuming this is because as the news reports a few couples "got frisky" in the basement, causing several people to reportedly leave and return less than an hour later and stab the party's 22-year old host. The three suspects were all 20 to 22 years old, also. Does anyone know anything about this? Was it a vanilla party gone wrong in a drunken moment, causing some guys to get extremely jealous and now the media is blowing this up to be a "swingers" party? Or was it really a swingers party?