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How close is too close - - If you have problems in your marriage, swinging is not going to fix them. I think the excitment of swinging will, perhaps, camoflage them for a short time. But in the long run if there are problems the level of trust that is required to swing -- just will not be there.
But I wonder how our statistics compare to the general public? Are swinging couples getting divorced at a higher or lower rate? Comparing our swinging friends with our vanilla friends, the swingers seem far more happy with and into their mate.
The scenarios and issues raised by this question, happen in and out of swinging.
Remember the joke -- "my wife ran off with my best friend, and boy I am going to miss him". That is a vanilla life joke.
We all need to take care to respect the intimate relationship between other swinging couples. We should all expect others to respect our relationship with our spouse. But in the end, if you trust each other enough to swing successfully, then I think the other issues of life will prove to be fairly easy to handle together.
Paris Clubs - recommendations? - We are in Paris tonight and are looking up swingers clubs. There are so many to choose from. Can anyone recommend any? Something more casual, perhaps a spa. Thanks in advance for any input.
Policing Ourselves - Can it be done? - Recently a suggestion was made that we as a group need to educate and police ourselves as a group in this our chosen lifestyle (thats swinging for all us simple folk) .
In order to do this effectively wouldnt there have to be some set of rules that everyone would be expected to adhere to? What would those rules be? how would they be created and ratified? would swingers from their respective states send represntatives to a central location to vote on these rules(oops now we get into politics) ? If you were teaching a new person (regarless of marital status or gender) the rules about swinging what would you teach them first?
I really would love to hear as much as possible from you guys.
richard
We're Back!!! - Hi there! - [quote=Canvas][quote=Starlights]Makes me wonder how many viable, sincere hits you two get with such a specific search criteria. You don’t consider yourselves “swingers”, but you’re on a swinger site looking for an exclusive relationship… from my own personal experience and from what I’ve seen with others, this type of relationship with another couple burns short but bright. I always caution couples we know when they come across other couples that change their minds from a sexy fun friendship to trying to back them into a serious “exclusive” relationship… excluding all other friends they’ve made in this LS along the way. It can be a drama filled and painful road. I’m sure of the 6 couples you’ve dated over the years you can attest to that if you’re being 💯 honest to yourselves.
This type of relationship should be (imo) found organically and mutually if that’s what it ends up being… Saying you want to be exclusive with a potential swinger couple from the start, while upfront and honest, can sound forced and rigid. Some of the stories of possessiveness between couples just sound absurd to us given the LS they’ve chosen.
In any case, good luck with your search.[/quote]
👍 I get that. If I'm understanding Candyrocks criteria, I can empathize with them though. We feel similarly challenged in that we haven't much interest in couples whose focus is bouncing from couple to couple. At the same time, I realize that the relationship we hope to find is like looking for a needle in a haystack. Adding to that challenge is our location, and, more these days, the time.
Our search might be narrow enough that we're dooming ourselves of any adult fun with others. But, if we settle for something that doesn't closely fit what we're hoping to find, it would seem we were not being true to ourselves, or the other couple.[/quote]
Having good friends with benefits like this sounds like a beautiful dream but we're not going to limit ourselves to the pursuit of just that in the meantime. Exploring and expanding our boundaries has been a lot of fun and we'll continue to do so. If someday we do find this perfectly matched couple that checks all the right boxes and pushes all the right right buttons that lives close by, awesome, we'll make it a thing. Until then? Well...
Moab Utah - Swingers in Moab - We should put a group together for a Moab trip!!
Have the forums become... - Forum Poll - ...a sad parody of the booty call section?
1) Yes, but how the fuck else do you get people to consider fucking you? I mean it's just TOO HARD to actually read profiles and write a thoughtful, provocative email expressing your interest and reasons why you think you might be a good match with a particular person or couple.
2) No, the forums were actually designed expressly to make it so someone has to expend as little effort as possible searching for and connecting with other like-minded swingers.
3) I didn't know there was any other way to try to connect with other people besides the forum. Besides, I'm spending 3 Gold Dragons per month to be a member and I damn well expect to get my money's worth in easy, free nookie! Dracarys!
4) Fuck you, Evil. You probably only get lucky when the junkies who live under the viaduct need a fix and you have a few bucks leftover from your SSI check to pay them for a BJ.
5) Meh, we just spam out Friend Requests and hope a few of the people we send them to will do all the work and try to convince US to fuck THEM. It's reverse psychology!
6) I'm starting to think this poll is just a tad sarcastic.
7) It's Saturday night and our Dance (Fuck) Card is so full we'll have to visit the ER early tomorrow morning for the severe chaffing from fucking so many people. Who needs forums?
8) That does it! We're going back to AFF and cruising for sex partners at run-down dive bars after last call.
Hello summer - Swingers couple party - Why don't single females have to abide by those same rules? Seems discriminatory doesn't it?
Alaska Swingers - - We had no luck there visiting but the Alaska bush company was fun
Ways to point out Swingers in public - - Just randomly point and announce..."hey look, theyre swingers" and see what kind of reaction you get from others around you. We have the black rings, but as not3d above that theyve become so common now by everyone that weve never had anyone react to them.
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - TPAFUNLUVNCPL2,
It's a preference thing. You are making a statement that covers how those in men in a couple feel that want to have another female to play with. That isn't always the case. There are tons of people out there that are seeking single males. You can pigeon hole everyone into what you think is acceptable. Just because you don't prefer them, doesn't mean others don't. Have an open mind and realize that we're not all here for the same reasons.
You mentioned what do single men bring. What if a guy is trying to please his wife and she wants to MFM and the idea also turns him on, to watch her being DP'd or perhaps he wants to watch or be the cuckold. There is a very diverse people with regard to ssexuality here.
-D-
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