Tasley Swingers in Virginia

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New to this all - - Single guys don't exactly have an easy time of it in the swinging world. It's made up mostly of couples with the occasional Unicorn (single female), and many couples have a "we're trading, but you're not providing the female part of the trade" attitude, which goes all the way back to when what is now called swinging was called wife swapping. And the vast majority of couples who are interested in inviting a single person to play with them are looking for a female, not a male. There just aren't very many people looking for a single male, and there are tons of single guys looking to be involved. So the numbers are against you. Besides that, it's hard for a single male to meet people. They're allowed to attend only a very, very few parties and/or events unless they have a female with them. Even the male half of a known swinging couple often isn't welcome if the female half isn't with him. He may be in a couple, but without the woman he's just another single guy. Your best chance at someone being interested in you is online at a site like this. But, again, there are gazillions more single males than there are people looking for them, so the competition is pretty tough. To be a "winner", you usually need to be relatively young, pretty good looking, and fairly fit. Unlike in the outside world, what the guy looks like is more important than what the girl looks like. So if you want to generate any interest, you have to post pics. And while nudes are a good idea if you have the body for it, straight dick pics are not, unless it's 10 inches long or something. And even then it might be a turn off more than a turn on for lots of people. If you don't have any pics of yourself posted, those difficult odds you face morph into impossible odds. If you do manage to attend any parties or events, chill. Don't be aggressive. Single males have a rep for assuming that any woman at a swinger's function wants to jump into the sack with them. From what I've seen, most single males aren't really like that, but enough are that single guys get labelled as a group, so the best way to behave is as if the woman you're talking to is someone you just met at some "normal" party. The only real difference between a swinging woman and a "normal" woman, whether she's single or in a couple, is that she doesn't think that it's necessary to be in some kind of a relationship with someone in order to have sex. Female swingers are just as selective as women in general, and while her presence at a swinging party does mean she's interested in sex, she might not be interested right then, or she might not be interested in you. And a good way to turn that interest off if it's there is to act like it's a given that she wants you. The most important thing to remember is that it's always up to the woman. Whether anything happens, and if it does just what happens, is her decision. So post some pics, be just as respectful to any swinger women you might meet as you would be to any non-swinger woman and if she's part of a couple be respectful to her man, and good luck.

Hello summer - Swingers couple party - Who said anything about an asset? What makes women's filters different than men? If I decide to identify as a female do I need to be sponsored? I'm asking because I'm sure more people would like to know. I have been to parties and I've seen both single males and couples get kicked out. Both sex's can be rowdy when alcohol and sex are involved. Are you talking about the aggressive instinctive behavior than men have? If so, there's a lot of guys there to put them in their place. I'm not a social bug and I'll sit in a corner and mind my own business and only talk when spoken to but thats my personality at any event.

What are swingers really looking for ?Are they looking for frien - Has the happen to you. - mmmmmm yeah it could be cool. point do i really care i say what I want ill run on and on and on dont like it dont read it

Ways to point out Swingers in public - - How about black silicone ring on the pinkie finger - both male and female- match them and you have a swinger couple !! New code for all of us ??? Or 2 stacked rings on the pinkie meaning shared ?

Question - do you talk about other swingers? - We have never met anyone from any website so we can't talk about people we havent met. For those we have met in the local club here, we will mention that we played with them and had fun but we NEVER share details and we won't speak badly of a couple even if we didnt enjoy the meeting, because everyone has their own opinions.

real members? - - You've struck on an interesting topic. I call them cyber swingers. They are swinger wanna be's . They find the thought of swinging erotic and interesting but they don't have the balls to actually get involved in the lifestyle. They like to hide behind the safety of their computer screen. They'll exchange email with you as long as you're willing or dumb enough to keep writing them. They'll never actually meet you or anyone else. That would be way too personal and would force them to crawl out from behind the security of their computer. Or you ocasionally run into the single guy that has created this fictional "couple". It's all a big game for him. He's just there to collect photos or maybe trick someone into playing with him because his wifes is "unavailable " at the moment. Whatever their game they're all the same because they both violate the principles of honesty and trust that the lifestyle revolves on. We get email all the time from couples that "have read your profile--think you guys are great and want to get to know you better". That generally sends off alarm bells for us. We'll respond and exchange an email or two. If the other couple doesn't have pics posted or pics of just one of them we ask for additional photos in the first email. Since we have good pics of both of us in our profile we never send any other pics other than those posted. If we get the "don't have any pics of him or he's camera shy or don't have a camera yet" or any one of the other lame excuses we've gotten over the past year or so--that's it--you're done as far as we're concerned. We'll give out our cell phone number right away and tell them to call us or give us theirs and we'll call them. We want to speak to both of them. If we can't because one's not there we'll call back at a more convenient time when we can talk to both of them. If everything seems ok during the conversation we'll make a date to meet at a convenient restaurant or club and take things from there. This seems to work well for us. It tends to weed out the "cyber swinger" right away. John & Colleen

New Swingers Club in Utah - Gauging interest in new club - We would definitely come when the wife is in town from work. Sounds like a great idea. Sounds like david and Marie are right on point.

Are swingers moral? - Who determines what morals are? - There's so much to write here, so I think I'll just bring up two points. In my experience, someone who has realized Atheism through careful and philosophical thought, tend to be much more moral than theists. Furthermore, the bible has to be the worst script imaginable to derive ones moral bearings--especially the old testament. If taken literally, the bible has many examples where rape, genocide, incest, and much more are excusable under certain conditions.

Swingers - a couples only lifestyle? - Are singles considered to be swingers? - What does Funk&Wagnall's say?

Calling all losers! - LS and club scene - ...........................................I am bored on a Sunday, so going to waste a bit of time. :) I have said this before and I will mention it again here. Often times people are looking for a black and white answer, a "this" or "that" or they tend to pigeonhole themselves into a place that feels comfortable to them. It is great that people can search for and find people of similar interests. The original question was why is the Utah scene so closely related to the club scene. To me, that isn't necessarily the way things are and so I am responding to shed a different insight into the question. How big is the club scene in Utah? I don't feel it is that big. We have the Moose Lounge on Fridays on a regular basis, we used to have Habits and then we have the parties that happen once a month or less frequently, such as the Sinful parties. Give or take a few other club locations and attendees. The average attendance at the Moose Lounge is around 80 people every Friday. My guess is that this number is well under 10% of the swinging population in the area. Just estimating. This only happens once a week. If we only consider the weekend as play time (Friday and Saturday), which is also an inaccuracy since people do meet weekdays and Sunday as well, that means that only 5% of the population of swingers is actually attending the swinger club scene on the weekends. Certainly not a majority by any means. Sinful is definitely a club scene. And maybe we should define "club". I will say that is an environment where there is a DJ or another form of music, often times on the loud side as people like to dance, has a dance area for such activities, and typically doesn't open until 9 or so at night. Sinful probably hosts on average 150 people on average (S&A, don't get mad if this number is off,lol) and these happen maybe once a month. Lets just round this high and say that is 20% of the swinger population. However, many that attend the Moose and other clubs are the same that attend Sinful. Similar crowd and often an overlap. So still nowhere near a majority, or even a large percent. In fact, quite the opposite. This scene is well in the minority. So I am submitting that this really isn't and accurate assessment of the situation and based on more of a sense or feeling than actual fact. What this tells us then is that most of the people in the lifestyle are not meeting at clubs and are not necessarily dancing and staying up until all hours of the night but are finding other avenues where they meet. What other options are out there. Venus Game night, Kandy K, Sensual Massage... These venues are not club scenes, are a relaxed place and quiet enough to talk without "using hand signals". There still might be music and a dance floor, but there are certainly quite areas to talk, socialize and sometimes even fuck, if that is your scene. I would estimate that as many or more people attend these type of events and for most of these it is an older crowd who is more apt to be in bed at an earlier hour, though that is also an assumption and assumptions are obviously a poor way to derive information or determine a truth. I would question if any of the people in this forum have attending these more mellow parties and what they didn't like about that. The loud music is gone, it is a great way to meet many nice, non-pushy people with similar interests and since the crowd is a bit more mature (probably not the Venus parties) then there would be people of similar interests there. Now it may be of benefit of the party hosts to start earlier, say 6 or 7, so the activities can finish up earlier and I'm sure the hosts would entertain that if it was a common complaint. Apart from these types of parties and club scenes the only other way to meet people in a group setting are house parties, although keep in mind the Sinful hosts to things outside of the club but the crowd will usually still be the same people who attend the Sinful Club parties so are probably younger and okay with staying up late and partying, so probably not for the majority of people responding on this forum looking for an early-to-bed group. Let's talk about house parties. The ones we host sometimes have upwards of 60 or 70 people. These are people we have met before, for the most part, and we don't invite random people to these. We have an area to dance, music, but also areas that are quiet. The party starts around 7 and goes until... whenever. 6 am at times, but many leave before that. These aren't orgy parties and people don't show up expecting that. We also do game nights where we have 3-5 couples over for games, drinks, no dancing, hot tub, etc. Also people we know. We have been to many house parties as well and it is usually people we have met before. We are very leery of parties where there is some expectation to show up and fuck. We avoid these. Not our scene. But these house parties are out there. The doors close at 9, naked by 10, fucking by 1015. You are expected to fuck someone. Definitely not for us but definitely an okay and acceptable thing for others. Judgment is such an incredibly hypocritical thing in the lifestyle and I am astounded by how many people judge others. It is one thing to not enjoy a certain thing and to stay away from it, but it demean it, negate the validity of it and try to reduce the people who do it is completely asinine. My point is there is a variety, a full spectrum to every aspect of the lifestyle. From people looking only to make friends to people only looking to fuck. There is no right and wrong or black and white. We have so many good friends now that we feel super fortunate and blessed every day. But how did we meet those friends. Here is the key. Through hard work. Through dinner dates, clubs, social events, house parties and networking. Remember, this is my opinion, so please, readers, don't get offended. If you limit yourself to one avenue your success will be limited and you will have very few options in finding that fun couple that you click with. Many of our friends that we have met at a club typically like to be in bed at 10, or sometimes like to stay up late. Some of the people we have met in the most casual environment turn out to be crazy, fun party animals. I'm not saying if you don't attend the clubs you won't find what you are looking for especially since we have already determined that the club scene is so small. What I am saying is that if you are expecting a one-stop shop, or a fix-all, your success will be super limited. Your goal, I believe, is to meet as many people as possible and then sort through those you like and don't like until you are satisfied with your results. If you label the "club scene" as negative in your own mind, you might also be inadvertently labeling other fun activities and only reinforcing the confirmation bias you already have. Don't limit yourself to one way of finding friends, especially since it sounds like it isn't working that well for you now. We have found friends in every imaginable situation. Single dates, group dates, vacations, house parties and yes, clubs. I know our way works simply by the amount of amazing people that surround us and we call friends, and yes, some friends with benefits. Taking the time to start a topic is a good idea. The people on here all seem to have a similar interest and maybe some of you will take advantage of that, meet, and if things align, you make new friends. Maybe there is a need for a group to form that meets around 6 and finishes around 10 where only wine is served and only soft music is playing in the background. If so, take the initiative and form such a group. Create your own success. Maybe there needs to be a better way to post smaller events where only a few couples are going camping, coffee drinking, or similar. And maybe it is on Swingular and just not being utilized correctly. I'm sure with enough feedback the site could be fitted with such a feature. So don't despair. There are many, many people with similar interests and needs. You just have to find them. Each scene and venue has positives and negatives. Try to focus on the negative and utilize the resources that they are and you just might find your holy grail of FWB or what else it is you are looking for. Good job on the topic and hopefully that perfect couple is just around the corner. Mr. SRO...................................................................................................