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Thank you Lifestyle. - A commentary about our journey - Thanksgiving just passed us by and Xmas and the New Year are quickly approaching. I thought I would take a long moment of my time, and your time if you are reading this, to tell this massive entity, called the "Lifestyle" how it has changed me this year. We have been in the Lifestyle for a little over a year and a half. We don't even like the name lifestyle. We prefer "kinky" or "adventurous" or even just "fun as hell", but it seems the term will be around for awhile longer. The wife and I often ponder what exactly the Lifestyle is. Is it a certain set of rules and guidelines that we all live in? Is it the same for us as it is for everyone else? How often does it hurt marriage or relationships and how often does it help? Do we regret our decision to enter into it? When we first tip-toed into the waters we were intimidated, in awe and totally unprepared for what we would experience. It all seemed magical and sometimes scary. We have and had a great marriage and thought we wanted a new, kinky adventure together. We planned to go slow and we would be fine, we were certain. But we were nervous. We were so sloshed at our first Sinful party that we irritated a few people there, no doubt, and probably made asses of ourselves. We still do that sometimes, but now we do it conscientiously. But we grew and learned quickly and have morphed into what we are today (huge asses). Interestingly enough, a few years before we entered the LS, we thought swingers were all gross, dirty, sexually infected people ( I am still not ruling some of you out). We had met a couple that harassed us at every opportunity and were the "creepy" type. Now we know people may think of us the same way if they found out, which is sad, because we like to be honest and open with all of our friends. So, like many of you, it is a secret we keep. It is a trade off for doing what we do. So what have I learned? How have I changed? I have always been a non-judgmental person by most standards, but still I had strong opinions about certain things. One spouse, one partner; that is how it should be done. So what changed? First off, our communication started to blossom about all sorts of things once my wife left her religion. I won't mention names, but it begins with an L and ends in DS. We talked and talked and talked and the more we talked the more we realized that we both had kinky minds and that maybe we should "experiment". So, we made some rules, actually a LOT of rules, and entered the ring. Still thinking one spouse, one partner, but maybe, just maybe we could play in the same room as other people. How kinky is that? Hence our name...sameroomonly. Well, as some of you know, the lifestyle is a monstrous, living, breathing beast and can quickly drag you to places you never thought possible. We made some mistakes, had some great times and just fumbled our way through for a few months trying to figure out where our lines were and what we should or shouldn't do. Then we got smart. We learned to communicate again, like we used to do privately, only now we could do it with other people around. And it was refreshing. No more secret code words (well, sometimes) and no more wondering if what one of us was doing was not condoned by the other. So that is the first thing I think the LS has helped us with. Communication. We communicate like mother fuckers. Better than all of our non-lifestyle friends, for the most part. Are we always amazing and never have bumps? Of course not. Anyone who says they never have drama are either liars or delusional. So thank you lifestyle for our ability to exchange ideas and to be more honest with each other, always. The next thing we found was that we were making friends at a very fast pace. We made a kik group and had our first party with about 40 people up in Park City only 5 or so months after joining the website. It was a blast. We still host parties and invite new people all the time. We enjoy introducing new friends with old friends. Wait, did I say friends or fuck buddies? Don't we sleep with all of our friends? Isn't that the expectation? Not for us. We have made friends that we know will be around until we are all old and gray. We have lost friends because we wouldn't fuck. There are whole discussions on these forums about how some just want to meet and fuck, because this is a swinging site, not a friend site. And to each their own. We don't judge, but for us the rewards of our friendships have far outweighed the 10 or 20 seconds of amazing sex. We have friends around the world that we never would have met without the LS. So to the lifestyle, I say thank you for all of the wonderful friends we have made. Love you all, some more than others ( you know who I am talking about). :) The LS has also taught me to be less judgmental and to avoid using words like "never" or "always". Life is full of gray areas and has lost much of its black and white features. Oh sure, I still judge, have preferences and prejudices, but we all do. I just really believe in walking in another's shoes before I make any decisions about someone's life. So lifestyle, thank you for making me more understanding of other people. Last of all, I just want to say that the sexual journey has been amazing. We have shared many hot, sexy and intimate times with some of you and we have come to realize how similar we all are. We all like sex, we all have a kinky side, or else we wouldn't be here. I have done things that I never imagined would ever happen, with some of the sexiest, most beautiful people I have ever met. I have shared intimate moments with people I care deeply about and others that were just passing through. All have their high points. I have experienced more than most people would even dream about, as have most of you. We are the select who choose to follow our dreams and fantasies. I think we are fortunate. So lifestyle, thank you for all the amazing sex. In the end the lifestyle is different for everyone. It is a whole sub universe in the middle of a "normal" society. Sometimes we have to walk among the shadows to keep our secret, but totally worth it. I would never trade the LS for my wonderful marriage and think I am the luckiest man alive to be married to my beautiful, amazing wife who has shared this journey with me. Love you, Babe. As with everything in life, there will be people who read this and like it, some who don't care and some who disagree or will want to pick it to pieces. That is what makes this amazing. There are so many wonderful, different people and the lifestyle is a perfect diving board to jump into the sea of waiting bodies and personalities. So if you are new, jump in, explore and learn. If you are old school, help others to weather the bumps and keep exploring. Long live the lifestyle. That is a little about my journey, how about you? I encourage anyone to add what they think or feel the LS has done for them, even negative things. Merry xmas to everyone and hope to meet some of you new people. And to my friends, I care about each and every one of you. The Mr.

Facebook group - - There is a page centered in Colorado, with a heavy Vegas following that is very sex positive and includes many swingers, kinksters, SW and just fun people. It has quite a variety of people, and some are not for everyone, but it can be fun.

Swinger & 🦄 Bait - An experiment to attract swingers and unicorns. - Hahahaha I love it. One cart for some bait and one for groceries should get plenty of attention.

Keeping safe - Single females staying safe - Terry, That's all fine and good but you don't think that a guy might just SAY that in hopes of changing the girl's mind later? I'm not questioning your integrity or motives just saying that, in general, many guys will say and do just about anything for sex. I could easily imagine quite a few scenarios where a guy could come across with seemingly good intentions but have ulterior motives. Hell, we've had guys write us and ask to meet them and their wives (without disclosing that we're swingers) and suggest that we get the wife really drunk and then have sex with them. Again, I'm not saying anything about YOUR character or motives, just that because a guy SAYS he won't play with his "date" doesn't necessarily automatically make him trustworthy. YMMV Evil ps- We won't EVEN get into the subject of things like date rape drugs which by many accounts ARE being used in the swing scene by nefarious individuals. [em]Emo_8[/em]

Black Ring, Right Hand - How to tell if someone's a swinger - The thing is, even though people in the vanilla world may know about something like black rings on the right hand, they probably won't notice it, especially with all the people wearing multiple rings nowadays. Most people just aren't all that observant. On the other hand, swingers who know about it will probably look for them. And if someone who doesn't also have one on asks you what's with the black ring, you can just say,"I like it." And if they then say "Did you know that it can mean ....?", you can say something like "Why do you think that?", or "Where'd you hear that?", which can lead to them saying they swing, or let you get out of the conversation without admitting anything yourself.~ Terry

STDs in the lifestyle - telling people they're no big deal - Hate to say it people, but if you are scared of STD's, this is probably the worst type of hobby, ativity you can have. Condoms or not the chance of contracting something still exists. Condoms break and the other juices flying around can circumvent a condom or other forms of protection. Especially HPV which is pretty common in sexually active people. It's not life-threatening but can be for women with the increased incidence of cervical cancer. It's like a lot of the other types of non life-threatening diseases, even if they aren't, who the hell wants to deal with something that you don't have to begin with? I mean even if there are treatments available, I'd rather not have to deal with something I contracted for the mere "Want" to fuck other people. See what I'm getting at? Like ThoughtGarden said, "abstinence" is the only way you can guarantee safety. So, again if you are worried, you might want to find another hobby, or just be extra safe and have a great time. It's what we've done and haven't had any problems so far. It's that one time though that could change a lot of peoples opinion on the lifestyle and safety. I do remember reading something that stated swingers for the most part are married, and believe it or not have an incredibly low rate of STD's because they keep the swinging on the inside with other safe, married couples. So, Single guys, sorry you are carriers of many bugs! LOL. Kidding. Screen them too and ask lots of questions. I think we can all have a great time. Find some great couples who you trust and swap until your hearts content.... That's all I got to say about that.. UtHot

Have you ever met anyone TRULY crazy in the lifestyle? - - OK so we're not overly qualified to answer, as we're quite new and haven't gotten to know anybody very well yet at all, but I do have some observations to add. Are we all nuts? NO. some are, some aren't. Many "normal" folks may think we're abnormal, crazy even. I mean, we don't exactly run around telling everybody we like to see our spouses pleasured by others, that isn't a very "Christian" or "normal" thing in society's eyes. It doesn't make us crazy. Adventurous? YES Thrillseekers? YES Different? YES Insane? NO Case in point: It's my observation that most swingers ride motorcycles. That puts them definitely in the first 2 categories. There are a ton more Bikers that are completely Vanilla and totally sane, some may say "Different" because riding isn't everybody's thing. (We're scared to death of riding, and probably never will know the serenity and enjoyment it brings most.) As far as meds go, remember this is the Zanax capitol of the world right here in the land of Zion. Not to mention the number of swinging active LDS members, other church-goers, retirees, well-paid professionals, business owners, and hard working blue collar folk. So the cross-section of society really is still there. Obviously by profiles you will find different strokes for different folks in the sexuality department, and on a Vanilla dating site, you get the same. We have members here who are octogenarians, and others who are barely old enough to get into clubs. Crazies? sure you bet, there has to be. Just as with everything else, a certain percentage of any group will be a beer or two short of a sixer. I think that's why many here are hesitant, if not reluctant to entertain the thought of a hook-up with somebody they know from the web, but haven't met in real life. We definitely fall in that category ourselves. How many booty calls really get answered? Alot of times your mailbox gets stuffed with candor, friend request, and maybe a few cell #'s, but when the brass tacks fall, they end up lying there. It's good to know that Evildoers hasn't ever feared for their lives, with their experiences over the years. The few couples we have met with one-on-one have seemed completely normal, honest, and respectful, regardless of whether or not they (or we) felt any attraction sexually. So I guess we're doing OK, and we're both excited to meet new people as often as we can. That said, I'm going to take my meds and get some shut-eye ;) ~Torque

'Neighbors with Benefits' to air on A&E - Excited to watch? - I agree 100%. This show is going to be comprised of a bunch of hot women and men. It will not represent the swinging community in any other way than people hooking up with people other than their significant other. But what do you expect, TV is all about ratings. Take the show Polyamory for example. That show didn't have the greatest ratings and I believe it to be that they used real people. Not just the best looking ones they could find. Without ratings a show can not survive and the network can not make money. This is the reason that we will probably never see a show that highlights the real life of swingers.

Swinging as solo Male part of a couple? - - My wife and I have been swingers for a while but she is not playing for at this time. She still attends parties with me and nude swims and such. She will goto meet/greets with me to assure all concerned that i am honest about our understanding. I changed my profile to reflect this and it has been since she stopped in January with not outside playtime for me. I know the world of swinging is a challenge for the single guy and I expected to find less playfriends but I thought that with a full disclosure of the honest situation would have attracted some that appreciate those that don

Meet swingers in Tooele - Where do the swingers hang out in Tooele? - Oh swinger's in Tooele County are more private and under the radar. Oh there are more then you think but, you have to know people first. They will never say if they are....However they are everywhere....Just got to Walmart!!!