Chauncey Swingers in Ohio

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Swinging and Children Don't Mix With Me, What about You? - Unforgettable experience - I have to say, having children and trying to meet with couples can be very hard on your lifestlye. Family always comes first in my book, but it doesn't seem like every parent thinks that, which is why I'm letting you know why they should start thinking about it. We thought that maybe if we could meet with a couple that also have a child or has children, that we could have a better, lasting relationship and have other things to enjoy with these couples, besides just swinging. Well, one couple didn't work out with us and I don't know how to go about letting them know they were wrong in what happened. I'm the only one that even seemed to get upset about the situation and I wanted to get others opionion to make sure I don't owe an opology to them. Here's what happened..... Me and my husband met with a couple at a swingers club, which was off-premise, and we talked some and explained we had children and that we wanted to meet with couples, but it was hard with younsters and it was also hard to find a reliable and trusting babysitter to be able to enjoy the night out. They the told us they had a child and that if we wanted to talk more and get to know each other better, that we could come to their home for a dinner, with our kids. Now...we explained up front that we don't play seperate and we definitely did not play if we had our children with us. They said that it wouldn't be a problem, no hank-panky with kids around, because they too had a small one. This sounded really great to us, because we thought we found a good couple to be friends with and have some extra benefits too, if we wanted. Well, things started out okay. We were greeted at the door by the family, and our kids was introduced to their child, and was showed some computer games and such to play. That gave us time to talk a little to the couple and was shown the outside of their home and such before dinner. After dinner is when everything went WRONG. First, I had to go to the bathroom. Well, while I was gone to the bathroom, the Mrs. decide to give my hubby a tour of the rest of the house, mainly the extra bedroom....and when I asked the hubby where my hubby was, he said.."Don't worry about them, they'll be okay for awhile"...well, that really ticked me off, especially knowing our children were now mixed up in this...and our oldest asking where his daddy went with that lady.....that was about the last straw for me....but I was in these peoples home, not mine, and I respect others homes, but in this situation, I was ready to leave, and without my other half....because he too knew our rules of playing. Well, when the Mrs. and mine came back up, my other half knew I was mad, but for some strange reason, he felt like he had to still play around with her, and in the same room all the children were in!!!! Not to mention, she couldn't keep her hands off him, which was not making my situation of trying to calm down any easier. When I finally got my hubby alone, I "very persistantly" told him me and the kids were leaving...NOW..and if he was smart he had better be out the front door before me or I would leave him there, and I truely meant it. I was so angry and hurt by all of the happenings around me, I thought that if this is what it's like to try and swing...FORGET IT...my nerves or marriage weren't going to stay together if this is what I had to look forward to everytime. My hubby didn't get out the door before me..he was too busy kissing the Mrs good-bye....and I mean french-kissing..... but, thank Goodness I got the kids out the door before me....and that didn't help out any on his part, believe me. We stopped swinging for many years after that because of trust with one another and with other couples saying one thing and then doing another. This particular couple apparently feels that nothing was wrong with what happened, and actually contacted us again after many, many, many years after this incident happened. I'm not one either to "shun" anyone, but this expereince really bothered me then, and still does, and after them contacting us again, through an e-mail, not by phone, it makes me wonder about my feelings on the matter. Am I wrong to feel this way, even after all these years? I do trust my husband NOW, after the bad expereinces, because there was one more after that, but it took alot of talking, yelling, and regaining a trust that is hard to achieve after something that drastic that involved your kids in the process. I e-mailed them back, but I know it was short and blunt, nothing mean, I don't do things like that, but what if they try again to contact us...what do I say? Any help/advice/opinions is appreciated. Hope no one ever has to expereince something like this...most marriages would never have lasted unless you really had a great understanding with your mate, and we put ours to the test and passed.......barely.

LDS Swingers Survey - Will any former/active LDS swingers take my survey? - Done and done

Identifying Swingers! - Lots of talk and now some action! :) - I'd wear it. -D-

Swinging 4ever??? - - As you can tell I am trying to get some more topics going other then the ones about FUCKHERIDID. NOt at all that I think they were bad posts..they were interesting, informative and glad we all know about the prick! It is time however, to talk bout something else. So, we wanna also know (along with our other forums we started today) do all you swingers picture yourselves doing this lifestyle till the day you die?? Or, do you think that there will be a time that you will be done. Is this just a phase your marriage is going thru, or is it something that you enjoy and will keep doing as long as you both can. What makes you wanna do this lifestyle....what drew you to it in the first place? What keeps you coming back for more? Is one of you in to it more so then your partner? Have you ever decided that you were done, but found yourself right back at it? Share your stories!!!

Pineapple or upside down pineapple - - What symbol comes to your mind first when you think of swingers? (Pineapple, upside down pineapple, or something else?) I’ve googled it but I’d like to get it from my people 😉

Help us understand double standard?? - - Ok all.... first dont flame us just a simple question. Why is there people in the swing lifestyle that dont swing both ways? Let me explain why are there so many swingers that only seek females? Isnt the purpose in swinging to trade partners? Why does only the female seek the pleasure? Is it just us that feels this way? Seems a double standard. Whats in it for him if you only seek pleasure for her? Seems selfish to us... sorry to rant and rave just need to vent:) hope we are not the only ones that feel this way

Do your friends and family know about your lifestyle? - - Well... does our families know? 12 years ago Kelly and I went to our first swingers party. I was nervous and it was made worse by seeing my mothers boyfirend there with his wife. No my mother did not know he was married. Am I going to go tell on this asshole..... no. He told on me!! My mother came alll the way into to Salt Lake (which she has only done 3 times in the 13 years I have lived in Salt Lake) to give me a rash of shit over it and explained that was the reason her and my dad got a divorce (I assume he wanted to do it and she didn't). She said the Kelly and I were going to end up the same way. I of course told her it was a one time thing and we didn't plan on ever going to another party. I know how very small this world is, and it is very small, I like to think that I have kept it secret enough that the only people who knew were fellow swingers and the ones I have elected to tell. Do my friends know? Well I have a good friend who I have told yes.... but the operative word being GOOD friend... and her and her hubby have decided to give it a try. See if they like the extra spice. In a snese if I tell someone I end up promoting the lifestyle.... but it is very few that I have told. Do co-workers know? I say only the sexy guys at my job know.... and I mean the really sexy guys... with the brown eyes and brown hair and mustache and goatee and a dick that knows how to pleasure me.

Physical Attributes vs. Personality - How important is being H/W proportional - I suppose it all depends on what your angle is. If you are looking for friends, physical apperaence might not be an issue. Maybe some are looking for friends and if they swing, so be it. Others are looking for swingers and if they become friends it is icing on the cake.

Toga Party this Saturday in SLC - Venus Game Nights - Roman Toga Party for Venus Game Nights - Friends, Romans, Sexy Swingers... Time to bring out your inner Roman! This game night will feature a Roman Toga theme with some accompanying Roman games. The afterparty will be even more eventful and really be something you don't want to miss! If you don't have a toga, you can either make one (instructions on Google) or buy one. If you don't have a toga and can't get one before Saturday, come anyway, it will be totally fine! To RSVP go to https://www.meetup.com/Venus-Game-Nights/events/259608771/ Space is limited so reserve your space early! RSVP on Swingular as well by going here: https://swingular.com/events.php?_a=details&_EID=3397 As usual, the first part of the evening will be the game night portion of the evening and will be pretty laid back, giving everyone a chance to have fun, chat with others, and just have a low-key good time. The second half of the evening will be for those that really want to let their inner Roman out to play. We will have some icebreakers to help everyone bring out their sexy selves. We have rented a house for the evening that will work out very well. With a built-in theater room, we plan on having some great movies playing to keep things hopping. Make sure to dress in your best Roman Toga wear as we will be having a contest for best male and female costumes. Again, if you don't have one, you can still come! The location is in the South part of the salt lake valley. We will provide the address, as well as the house rules after you RSVP and the date draws nearer. Couples and single women are always welcome! No single guys, however. If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to email us here, Meetup or send us a Kik. Our Kik is CalianaZ. See you Saturday! Mr. & Mrs. Caliana

What about the lifestyle didn't meet your expectations? - Preconceptions and disappointment. - I'm home bored, so stop here if you don't want to read a bunch of shite. lol. I think we both entered the lifestyle with some preconceived notions of what the people in the LS would be like, but that was mostly from our limited experience with being vanilla and having LS peeps try to hit on us. It just seemed creepy, desperate and gross at the time. We assumed most of the players would be super aggressive, ready to fuck anyone and have zero interest in relationships outside of sex. Our initial entry was simply to watch and be watched. We quickly learned that there are just as many wonderful people in the LS as out of it. Maybe more. There will always be the outliers, the few percentage on each end of the spectrum that are more extreme, but that happens in any population. Overall, it was a happy surprise. So that would be a negative expectation that wasn't met. As far as things we were hoping would happen or expectation that weren't met, we have very few. But we also went into the labyrinth without really expecting or assuming anything. I don't think we were naive enough to think that this segment of the population was somehow immune from the social characteristics that reveal themselves in any other social class or group. You will always have the "cool kids" the "shy people" the "jocks" the "geeks" the people who classify themselves as the "pity party" and blame the world for their problems. Those things will exist anywhere and should. Swingers are a diverse group of people with a few, maybe very few, common goals. Those goals I think are to meet others with social deviancy and those interested in expanding their sexual experiences or simply to meet new friends. Swinging, in itself, doesn't solidify your beliefs in anything else (politics, food preferences, choice of travel location, or even how or what you are looking for as swingers). I think that is where expectations can fail. If a person goes into a situation thinking, "I/we think "x" so everyone else must think "x" as well", they are bound to be disappointed. I've said this a lot of times, the lifestyle is not black and white. Life isn't black and white. There will be frustrations around every turn if you allow yourself to be duped into thinking your way of thinking is more than just your viewpoint, that it is universal to everyone. I see people complaining of flakes, people who meet once then run away, etc. That's how they roll. That's their truth. It's what they are comfortable with or wanting and who am I to judge. That being said, I don't have to associate with them and hopefully learn how to avoid that situation or become more efficient at finding people with similar interests. The lifestyle is work. Sometimes a lot of work. I think it's foolish to think that it should be easy to find 4 people who all jive. Think about how many people you have dated before settling on the right one for you. And to assume that somehow changes in the lifestyle and that after chatting on kik for a few weeks then meeting over drinks will somehow magically connect you. Ugh. Sometimes it happens. Sometimes not. But I wouldn't expect it. For others, the thought of any connection past the one-nighter is absurd. Why would you want to make friends with your fuck-buddies? It may be too risky and cause too many emotions. Point is, we are all different and that is what makes the journey so beautiful. And, just a note about flakes, since it is a recurrent theme. Yes, maybe there are more flakes in the lifestyle, but I'm guessing it's specifically related to the nature of the LS. Swinging for some can be very intimidating and frightening. Sometimes the chase is much more fun than the fucking. Not excusing them that do flake, it seems a problem for sure, but I think I understand, at least in part, why it happens so much. There is so much social pressure not to be in the lifestyle and most were brought up without it being the normal way to live. So society is telling us we are wrong, gross, deviant, etc. Add to that the fear of actually getting naked and fucking someone else and it can cause a lot of anxiety in some. When we first started we were petrified to even go the parties thinking it was going to be a fuck/rape fest. lol. Turned out we were wrong but it was a learning process. Lastly, if you are already treading carefully and the couple/person you are supposed to be meeting gives off any bad vibes, maybe flaking is best. It's hard not to hurt someone's feelings and honesty isn't always what happens. I know we have been honest with couples and it turned into a shit-show. Why don't you like us? If you only meet us and give us a chance we can prove we are wonderful. Other's like us, why don't you. It's hard to be honest at times about why there isn't a connection. May flaking be a way to spare feelings? I don't know. There are probably a plethora (Hefe, do you know what a plethora is?)of reasons people flake and some of those my be that they are just douches. But likely there are other people that aren't and are just trying to get out of a situation they are unfamiliar with. Avoid the douches but maybe give those others a second chance. Evil: always good topics you bring to the table. So you think because people like sex they should be good at it? I know a lot of people who love food but suck at cooking. haha. Maybe having too many options on the table can also make people lazy. I don't have to try hard if I know tomorrow is another partner. To some it's the quantity and not the quality. But I can see why the expectation would be there. All in all we really have no complaints. It's been a fascination journey. Some ups, some downs, but always and adventure. We will keep our expectations low, both of ourselves and those around us. Less disappointment that way. I'm going back to sitting in my underwear, drinking a beer and watching TV. Zero expectations. haha. :) Mr. SRO