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Gangbang - - I been to a few. It's always been done by close friends so the trust factor was always solid from the get-go. A few drinks...laugh a bit...loosen up.
Once the woman was blind-folded and we all took turns touching her. She knew all of us that were there, but still...the thought of her not knowing who was doing what at which time was a turn on to her.
She was very open to anything, which was fun. So, yeah...good times.
But I think as a single male it's important to understand that yes...it's great getting your rocks off on a woman that loves the attention. That is what I think makes it stimulating for all involved...but I've seen a few guys freeze up over the whole concept when they realize whatever fantasy they been imagining in their head is about to start in front of their faces. LOL
Reality slaps a few guys in the face and they realize they can't either a) deal with it or b) can't perform. So I like what Trigeek36 said...if you want a certain number, invite double that. Some are going to have issues.
I always liked attached women so the fun of it was just that...all of us having a good time with no-strings. The cool thing is...some of the best people I ever met are swingers. We can always fuck and then go shoot pool afterwards...or vice versa. LOL
The main thing is to remember this (single guys)...a guy loves having his woman banged by others...she ain't gonna start dating you. Respect them, buy them both alcohol on a regular basis and you will have a great time for a LONG time.
Not sure if that answered any of FOX'S questions but I hope that may have helped somebody. :)
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - Ali,
He's just frustrated with me. LOL! I am a mouthy prick a few people would probably like to punch. LOL! I know this guy is a vet, because he talks like one. LOL! I do not take offense to what he said. I think, in reality, by reading him, he'd probably save a life before he'd take one. Let us boys bask in our bantor.
-D-
P.S. Thanks Ali, you're such the mother spirit.
Translating Personals/Swingers Ads - - HOW TO TRANSLATE PERSONAL ADS:
WOMEN'S ADS
40-ish...................................49
Adventurer...........................Slept with all your friends
Athletic................................No boobs
Average looking...................Has a face like a basset hound
Beautiful...............................Pathological liar
Contagious Smile..................Does a lot of Ecstasy
Educated..............................Banged her Political Science professor
Emotionally Secure...............Medicated
Feminist...............................Fat ballbuster
Free spirit............................Junkie
Friendship first.....................Trying to live down reputation as a slut
Fun......................................Annoying
Gentle..................................Comatose
Good Listener......................Borderline Autistic
New-Age............................All body hair, all the time
Old-fashioned......................Lights out, missionary position only, no BJs
Open-minded......................Desperate
Outgoing..............................Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate............................Sloppy drunk
Poet.....................................Depressive Schizophrenic
Professional..........................Certified Bitch
Redhead...............................Bad dye-job
Reubenesque........................Grossly Fat
Romantic..............................Looks better by candle light
Social...................................Has been passed around like an hors d'oeuvres tray
Voluptuous...........................Very Fat
Height/weight proportional....Hugely Fat
Wants Soulmate...................Stalker
Widow.................................Drove first husband to shoot himself
Young at heart. ....................Old bat
--------
MEN'S ADS
40-ish.....................................52 and looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic...................................Watches a lot of NASCAR
Average looking......................Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back
Educated................................Will patronize the shit out of you
Free Spirit..............................Banging your sister
Friendship first.......................As long as friendship involves nookie
Fun........................................Good with a remote and a six pack
Good looking.........................Arrogant
Very good looking..................Dumb as a board
Honest....................................Pathological Liar
Huggable................................Overweight, more body hair than a bear
Likes to cuddle.......................Insecure mama's boy
Mature...................................Older than your father
Open-minded.........................Wants to sleep with your roommate but she's not interested
Physically fit............................Does a lot of 12-ounce curls
Poet.......................................Wrote ex-girlfriend's phone number on a bathroom stall
Sensitive.................................Cries at chick flicks
Very sensitive.........................Gay
Spiritual..................................Got laid in a cemetery once
Stable.....................................Arrested for stalking, but not convicted
Thoughtful...............................Says "Excuse me" when he farts
Orgasms . . . the expressions on their faces - I love to watch ladies when they cummmmm - OH MY . . . we thank all of you ladies who are so willing to share with the rest of us swingers your triumphs.
The Orgasms yes that sexual excitement, consisting of intense muscular tightening around the genital area. Experienced as pleasurable wave of tingling (sometimes quivering) sensations through parts of the body. You know that it was a good one when your toes start to tingle. That is the reason for most of us to have intercourse (fuck) the opposite sex. Not only for us to fulfill our needs but our partners needs to achieve . . . their private moment of . . . Joy . . . Pleasure . . . Fulfillment.
As someone before stated, it
Professionals - - FL4FUN,
I'm just stating the socio-political realities of OUR area. It's a bizarre place. My point is that nobody really cares what working class folks do around here. But 90% of folks do seem to care what you do in your spare time if you have some sort of prominence in the community professionally speaking. I don't make the rules. I just have to live by them.
A lot of swingers are looking for people they actually share non-sexual interests with as well. I see nothing wrong with talking about hobbies, taste in recreational activities, etc. in a profile. It just puts more meat on the bones...helps you get a bit better idea of who a couple is.
As club owners, we are keenly aware of the fact that there are a LOT of different types of folks coming at the lifestyle from a LOT of different angles and hoping to find a LOT of different things. And it's all OK so long as nobody is getting hurt.
I just recalled one profile I saw from a couple out of New Port Richey, FL, I believe. They talk quite a bit about the fact that he is a professional fishing charter captain. I found their profile very interesting. It was pretty detailed, well constructed, and enticing. You see, we travel to that area about once/year on vacation and I love to fish. I figured he and I might have some things in common. Another couple talks about the fact that he is a sky-diving instructor and she is an avid sport shooter. My wife wants to jump out of an airplane BADLY and we love sport shooting. So we have set up a meeting with them as well. The more detailed a profile is, the more we appreciate them.
what the f#%@ was he thinking? - swingers still deserve respect - Seems that some guys mistake swinging sites like this for porn sites. Too many stag movies and not enough time in social situations with others to develop any manners. It really is in poor taste but on the other hand the poor taste is to be expected from time to time and isn't worth traveling to beat on someone...
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This lifestyle - What are we really? - Great thought out comments to this posting ThoughtGarden, and we have to agree with you 100%. We love (but don't ever think that would be romantically- LOL), and miss you guys.
A good topic to discuss. As for us, we count ourselves as "Fantasyers" that have things we want to experience and do so with the people that we enjoy (and or love) spending time with. Swingers (hard core) may be at one end on one leg, and Poly may be at the other end and on another leg, but we like being at the "Y" and in the middle, whatever that is labeled. :p
We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - Perfect post TG!
Weve had a couple of interesting experiences, we learn from it and try to recognize the red flags when they pop up.
Can you be in love AND swing? If so, tell us how! - - I guess I will make a much stronger response. The lifecoach is full of shit! My wife and I are both on second marriage and the previous ones fell apart because of cheating. It wasn't the sex it was the lies, the betrayal of trust. My wife and I love each other like crazy. Swinging is a recreational activity we could do without if we no longer like it. Even during swinging I am only sharing my wife's body, her heart belongs only to me and vise versa.
We didn't get into swinging to FIX anything. We got into it because we wanted to add to what is already great for us. It was not a replacement for something missing. our premise is making friends and if we have sex fine and if not we have a friend to do things with.
Also if anything swinging made me love my wife even more. Her love and trust for me cannot be affected even by me having sex with others. We have a couple of times swung (if that is the word) separately and she came back to tell me about it and did so with my knowledge that is what she was doing. And of course vise versa. We still trust each other and love each other. Plus while swinging I can see other men, or women, pleasing her and get a view of what she looks like from a different point of view than I have when making love to her.
As others have said, as long as you communicate, don't take things too personal, and maintain trust swinging will be fun and not hurt your relationship.
When I say don't take it personal I mean like one poster said you should be able to say "she give good head" or she is talented. LOL we had been with a guy in a threesome and the guy did something that I have never done and made the wife Cum really fast and hard. When she had recovered she blurt out without thinking "You have GOT to learn how to do that!!!!!"
It kind caught us both off guard but we laugh about it now. She didn't say "I love him more" She said "DAMN he has a technigue that send me through the roof!"
I have learned from the guy how to do it and have used the technique several times. Even if I can't duplicate it so what? She still LOVES what I do to her too. More importantly we still LOVE each other totally.
OK OK I willget off the soapbox. It just ticks me off that people who are supposed to be great at teaching relationships most of the time have relationships that suck yet they can tell you how to do it. BULL. Save the money for the LifeCoach and take a trip with a plane full of swingers and go to HEdonism III. It would be money better spent.
LOL I will quit now.
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