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Somers Swingers in New_york

Somers Swingers

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Daytona Bike Week - - This first weekend a lot of swingers are going to be at the Iron Horse... There is a group from another swinger site that is making plans to meet there... We won't be able to join them this weekend but those are the plans.

IVegas 18 & 19 anyone been to HUSH? - - We are thinking about checking out HUSH Swingers Club on mon. 18th or/& tues. 19th. Anyone been there that can offer any advise?

Dating other Couples - Have you done it? - Been there, done that, have the t-shirt. We know plenty of people who've done it, and done it successfully (up to a point), ourselves included. We don't know of many, if any, where it has lasted for more than a few years and didn't end somewhat badly. It CAN be quite heady and has the potential to take swinging to the next level. Unfortunately, it is also exponentially more likely to crank up the drama factor to eleven (out of ten). Quite often each couple has their own "agenda" (for lack of a better term) that is often at odds with the other couple's agenda. We've seen it frequently cause weird jealousies not only between primary partners but also between non-primary partners and in a few extreme notable cases it has ended marriages. In our case, we were relatively long-term swingers at that point who, although never really super active in the scene, felt like we'd checked off most of the things on our swinging bucket list and were somewhat curious if there was more out there to explore in swingerdom...or if we were sort of done with the scene. The couple we started "dating" wasn't really the kind of couple we usually were attracted to and maybe that was part of the allure. They also had a very interesting (to say the least) dynamic in their marriage that really was at odds with that in our relationship. Ultimately they kept pushing boundaries (started throwing the "L" word around and much more), pushed for more and more separate activities and were insidious in slowly and subtly causing rifts, both large and small, as well as a LOT of drama. We actually didn't even realize how much drama and subterfuge had occurred until we were finally out of the situation entirely. We actually miss them a little, at times, and often wonder if there might have been a way to talk things out and come to a better understanding of how to continue on in a healthier way but they've actually gone on to do exactly the same thing to a number of other couples we know (it's a small world in Utah swinging and word gets around) and it seems to be their pattern. Tldr; It can work. It's quite rare when it works long term. It has the potential for disaster. While it's appealing in many ways we don't really recommend it. YMMV

Swinger friendly clubs in the Bay Area? - Places to meet up - We don’t get out much but we would like to find a place in the Bay Area of CA we’re swingers come go meet and relax and be ourselves. Anyone know of such an area?

KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - P.s. Poor little fat girl that realized that your husband was sick of you eating Bonn-bonns and wanted to spice up your life. Don't blame the lifestyle on your actions. Only you can ruin your marriage!!!!! We are free spirited people that love interaction with like minded souls. If you got an STD out of it, you meet the wrong peeps and forgot to wrap up

Why Be In Utah? - - [quote=EVILDOERS]Actually I've always wondered the same thing about Florida. Substitute the crazy Mormons for the Bibile thumpers from Orlando north into the panhandle, add in the hurricanes, torrential rains, gaters, snakes and mosquitos...besides, I've heard the snow skiing is HORRIBLE there. But I'll bite. 1) No porn. You can buy dirty magazines but (unless you know where to go) hard core x-rate movies are technically illegal to sell. A non-issue in the internet age. If you're still buying dvd's at the local porn emporium you need to maybe update your computer or your media server or something. 2) No real beer. Again a myth. You can only buy 4% (by volume) beer in grocery stores but you can get full strength beer at state liquor stores, restaurants and places like brewery stores. Try getting ANYTHING to drink in some dry towns/counties in the Bible Belt. 3) True to some extent, although Salt Lake City itself is VERY eclectic and quite liberal politically. But at least our LDS lawmakers know basic female anatomy and have somewhat of a grasp of proven basic science. No kooky evangelicals freaking out every time someone mentions birth control or evolution. 4) Most people are afraid of Mormons? Really? I've heard they have horns and the missionaries CAN be a little annoying when you're fucking and they're ringing the doorbell but I don't think people are truly afraid. Besides, contrary to popular belief the swing scene here is alive, active and vibrant. I'd wager that per capita we have more, and more active, swingers than just about any place you can name. All that repressed Mormon sexuality eventually bubbles to the surface and until you've fucked a formerly repressed little Mormon girl who's discovering her sexuality you, my friend, haven't fucked! :-) [/quote] EVILDOERS summed it up nicely. I would also add that the cost of living is lower than most "cool" places in the country. Also, the people here seem to be much more attractive than in most states(it probably has something to do with the water). No matter where you live there will be good and bad qualities, but overall the good outweighs the bad in Utah. It's just what you make of it.

Single Males - - [quote=CTA313][quote=EVILDOERS] ...get a girl to join you....Not only do you now "bring more to the table", but you have the added credibility that if you can find and finesse a girl into joining you in this little adventure we call swinging (whether it be a girlfriend, a wife, a second cousin twice removed, or just a hot fwb) you might just not be a giant douchecopter.[/quote] Ignoring the need to "finesse" someone and unhealthy gender stereotypes in general, this line of reasoning is a little troubling as it presumes that a male's company is inherently worth less. Or that an absence of semi-romantic relationships somehow speaks poorly of his character. I personally think approaching someone whom you aren't already fairly close with and soliciting to go to a swingers party is a bit out of line. Especially if her company is sought as an accessory to demonstrate to others that he is not, as you say, “a douchecopter”. Call me old-fashioned. [quote=EVILDOERS] I know we can't be the only people who secretly wonder just a little bit about some single guys and why they aren't with somebody. Do they secretly hate women (yes, we've met some that actually do), are they just too lazy (or busy, maybe...but hey, we're all busy) to find someone, are they serial killers and/or just not very nice guys? [/quote] Oh, I hope you are! That's a really unfortunate outlook to have. Promising relationships take time to find, let alone build to the requisite amount of trust and stability to try things like this. In the mean time, I don't see anything wrong with someone pursuing their interests while still holding out for someone worthy of their emotional investment. To me, that behavior is quite attractive should be respected! It doesn't get any better than someone who is confident, self-actualized, and motivated to pursue their desires. Sadly, it sounds their gender influences whether this is seen as a desirable trait. I'm not sure how long you've been out of things (30 years?), but it's easy to forget the struggle when you're comfortable in a marriage. Things are more fluid. People don't feel the need to settle down like they used to. [quote=EVILDOERS]I know many will say they've tried and swinging is a deal breaker for most women. After almost 3 decades in the swinging trenches meeting and talking to other people, both couples and singles, we would disagree....many, if not most, women could eventually come around to the idea of swinging once they feel safe and secure in a relationship.[/quote] This is just confirmation bias if the evidence comes from a sample of people you have met while swinging. [quote=EVILDOERS]...those of us who DID put in all the blood, sweat, and tears into a relationship and allow it to grow to the point of daring (don't think for a second we aren't risking a LOT in opening up our relationships to other people!) to allow others access to our significant other sometimes wonder why some others want to take a shortcut to all the sweet swinging bennies with little or no risk on their own part.[/quote] If you're not comfortable sharing your wife with someone you might view as a potential competition, you definitely don't have to. On the other hand, there are a lot of people enjoy it :) This smacks of the old “you must suffer as I did” chestnut. [/quote] Yes, I agree, "finesse" was a poor choice of words. In my defense, I was at work and rather in a hurry to make a point...that apparently I didn't make well (and my attempts to also be humorous apparently fell flat too). Rereading my post it does smack a little of mild gender bias but I can assure you that it wasn't my intent in any way and most certainly is not my outlook on women, relationships or life in general. My intent was simply to advocate approaching swinging as a mutually desirable activity that two partners desire and share equally in. And not that it matters, but I've shared my wife with probably over a hundred men, married and single, and I've never thought of any of them as competition. But I never thought of swinging as "sharing" my wife either, but instead as her deciding to be sexual with another person and me being totally okay with her decision to do so. Sharing her, to me, almost denotes some sort of ownership or at very least some kind of permission that I would have to give. Both those ideas are not a part of our relationship. Perhaps the concept of "competition" in swinging interactions is a single male attitude? I don't know. And I didn't mean it in any way, shape, or form as a "you must suffer as I did" trope but simply as the idea that we invested a LOT of hard work and time making our marriage what it is and together deciding to risk opening it up to the excitement and also the possibility of harm that is swinging. I think, perhaps, that sometimes single people in the lifestyle don't quite understand the very real possibility of permanent damage (or worse) to the relationship that couples who swing are flirting with. For many (most?) of us, our marriages/relationships are THE most precious thing we have. What, if anything, are you risking? A bruised ego?

Grammar - Some suggestions for better communication ... - Here's a tip. Veterinary dentistry is WAY cheaper and 6 out of 10 swingers can barely tell the difference between human teeth and pig teeth. Don't let them talk you into either the cow teeth OR the horse teeth. Yeah you pay less per tooth but they don't look anywhere near as natural unless you like live in Delta or Toquerville.

Black Rings - Do Swingers really? - I have pineapple stickers on the motorhome just in case

A&E New show about swingers... - neighbors with benefits.... - Well,, did anyone watch it? What did you think? My thought,,, just another catchy title for a reality series,, not realistic necessarily,, had some good points, but looks like they are going to have some "DRAMA", ( Britanny & Mike?). So much like all the other shows,, reckon they think everyone will get all worked up in the conflict and anxiously await the next show. Probably will watch another or two,, and hope to be wrong with the direction it seems to be headed already. On the other hand,, there has been a lot of coverage here in Tn on a wingers club opening up next to a school. Look for a lot of legal action on that one I bet!

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