Olivebridge Swingers in New_york

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HELP!!! - Need help settling a disagreement between me and the hubby. - I would again say, "That depends." We rarely hook up at parties either but it's because at this point in our swinging career we no longer feel the need/desire to fuck just to say we fucked. We're not prudes by any means but our curiosity has been more than satisfied over the years and we now only hook up with people we find a really good connection with. And we're no longer upset or disappointed when we go out and DON'T hook up, although we have been at times in the past and know quite a few couples who really feel like they've wasted their time (and maybe a good babysitter) when they don't hook up. It very much depends on who we meet at a party, how well we connect, our general mood and other intangibles. We've found that there are generally two types of swingers; those who really just want to forego all the bullshit and fuck and those who want to get to know people a little bit first (even if just briefly) before they decide if they want to fuck them. Which type you are will likely determine how often you hook up. But you know what? There isn't just one way to swing.

Info for Noobs - - Bored at work today so I thought I would share some thoughts, since I know you have all been waiting for me to say something more. Don't deny it. :) I figured I would share some insights for noobs or just anyone else who will connect with our experiences. I already posted the 101 of what I thought was important, so this will be less rules and more insight. We seem to meet a lot of people who are just beginning and they always have the same questions. So.... The first thing to realize is that swingers are just like everyone else, just kinkier. They don't all fuck sheep (some do) or masterbate in public ( I do), but for the most part are just regular citizens who happen to like exciting sexual adventures. For the most part people are not very pushy, and if they are, you can quickly diffuse them just by being direct and telling them where you stand, or lie, or bend over. :) If they don't, probably a creepy couple who you don't want to see anyway. Most of the house parties we have been to are fairly mellow. Apart from the nakedness there doesn't seem to be a lot of random acts of sex happening all over the place. So don't be afraid to go to the parties, but ask before you go what the party is like. Nobody will rape you unless you like that sort of thing. We were so nervous during our first party that we sat in the car drinking until some people we knew walked us in. By the end of the night, I was the only one in my underwear. Awkward. Not really. There isn't a magical solution to meeting people. You have to make contact, talk to them and eventually meet, hopefully in an environment where you have a quick route of escape if needed. We used to invite new couples to our house for a hot tub night but quickly realized if there was no attraction for us, it was often times hard to politely get them to leave. So coffee, drinks something simple is best. We have met some of our greatest friends in the LS and are sure to meet more. The people tend to be open minded, friendly, educated and fun to be around. So even if you don't intend on playing with someone you might keep the option open for a lasting friendship, though some on the site are definitely NOT looking for that. You can figure that out pretty quickly. The Sinful parties are a great, no pressure way to meet people. Shout out to J & A (and M, I never forget M). :) The Orchard parties tend to get a little more rambunctious, but only upstairs, at least at the venue by Brewvies. So it is also a good place to go if you want to just chill, or if you want to be a little more daring and see sex or have sex. We haven't been to as many manor parties, but they are well done and seem casual as well. Don't think we have ever seen any sexual acts at Manor. Habits is definitely turning out to be a swinger's hangout. Saturdays seem to be the biggest turnout for the LS. Can be some creepers there but for the most part it is fun and entertaining. Not our favorite but will do in a pinch. Our name is SameRoomOnly because when we started we were only having sex with each other, in front of others and figured we would never full swap. We learned quickly that rules are easily broken and that it is best to learn to communicate on the spot in any situation. We use hand gestures and do have a few code words if needed, though typically most people are very happy to hear open communication about what others in the situation want. We certainly do. If you don't want that ninth orgasm in a row, just tell me, I will back off. No hard feelings. Well, we have come a long way from SameRoomOnly. And here we are. Maybe a bit smarter, a lot kinkier and have a lot of fun experiences behind and ahead of us. I am raising my imaginary glass of bourbon to all of you we have met and to the good times. Cheers.

Southern Utah Parties - - We are in St. George. There isn't a vibrant scene but ibwouldnt say it is a ghost town either. It isn't a swingers paradise

Sexy Soft Swappers - Looking for like-minded friends for hanging out and house parties - Hi all - Apologies for the slow response on this, we dropped our initial message in this forum and then the holiday craziness hit, and it has taken us a bit to get back to getting this rolling. We also had so many responses here, and sent to us in person, that gave us a lot more things to think about in creating this sort of group. We are glad to see so many other groups be formed because of this thread, and we have been working with Nakedcouple5150 (Jonsie) above to try and figure out the next best steps. Jonsie is 1000% times more organized than us and has really spearheaded getting all the requests together into some sort of manageable form for us to start creating groups and adding people to them. We immediately ran into a few things though: 1 - we have well over 130 requests to be in the initially proposed Kik group, and Kik only accommodates 50 per group. Could we use Swingular or another app to include everyone? Sure - But, we specifically wanted to hold this in Kik, so that is what we have done and will continue to admin. I think there are several folks who have set up other groups via Swingular or other apps because of this thread, and I encourage you to hit them up if you'd like to join one of those that accommodates more than 50 users. 2 - We started this thread so that "soft" swingers who often feel pressured in the larger events or groups would have a space where they felt expectations were already clear, but, of course, there are various levels of what many of us consider "Soft." So...... What we have done is decide create a few different groups to accommodate the requests and also to try and group like-minded, and geographically relative, people together. When either Jonsie or I send you an invite we will ask you to rate your level of "Softness" on a scale of 1-3, using these definitions: [b]"1: enjoy soft only 90-100% of the time (kissing, touching, rubbing, light fingering, no oral with anyone but your partner, no intercourse with anyone but your partner)Expect not to be pressured or invited to partake in oral or intercourse partner swapping in the Kik group or at events organized via the Kik group. 2: soft 50-90% of the time (kissing, touching, rubbing, fingering, oral, no intercourse with anyone but your partner) Expect not to be pressured or invited to partake in any partner swapping in the Kik group or at events organized via the Kik group. 3: soft 10%-50% of the time and okay with swapping intercourse [/b] Using your response, we will try and put you into the group or groups that fit you best. If you want to save us some time, you can also use this Google Sheet: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1UfKua5zp4tWWcC3OSKQqt2S5lKhm8M9nI4elWrK3EzI/edit?usp=sharing to fill out your preferences. Just remember that if you use this, people may be able to see your email address in the "shared to/accessed to" list. Obviously, no approach to organizing all of this is perfect, and if you aren't down with how we have chosen to try and tackle it, we definitely encourage you to start your own groups/threads. Thanks to all you sexy softies for your interest and patience :)

Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - [quote=JESSEJAMES][quote=EDANY0178][quote=JESSEJAMES][quote=EDANY0178]DVP? [/quote] double vaginal[/quote]Yes me please LOL[/quote] deal![/quote]SWEET!!!

what if I want to but he doesn't - - [quote=NU2THEGAME]the worst part is that I consider myself intelligent with good common sense, so why can't i repress this- why is this so important to me right now? my hormones are taking over my common sense!! don't want to ruin a marriage for a cheap thrill- but also know that sex is a very important part of a marriage... part of it i'm sure is that I've been with him since i was 14..... i know this.[/quote] There are many little things that we all do without that do not really affect our lives to any degree. But sometimes the little things turn out to be really big things. I would say that you have found one of yours. I sounds like you are telling us that you everything your husband wants sexually. But there is something you need that you are not getting sexually. We could guess as to what that is but it would not help to guess. You need to examine and define what it is that you are lacking. Otherwise all we can do is talk in generalities. Some people only feel safe when things are neatly defined and unchanging. I think that most swingers will tell you that sexually we get into a rut or pattern with any lover and that for many of us that is like the end of life. Most will also tell you that this lifestyle helps to keep you feeling alive and part of the world. You learn knew things from different people and your world opens wider. Marriage changes how many think or act. Why that is would take many pages off topic. A marriage like good government should be one of give and take and compromise. Once one side had decided not to compromise or find a solution that makes their partner happy, then they have decided that the marriage is no linger important. As an example: A woman once told me that after marriage her husband only touched her once a year on a specific day. The rest of the time he was a cold fish. That is all he wanted and what she wanted did not matter. In a way that was sexual abuse of the worst magnitude. To choose a celibate life for one

Rules - - This is not merely an issue on Swingular, but is a mind-set that we have encountered on every site we have belonged to, in every geographical area, and at many parties. Seemingly the single ladies get the accolades, while their counterparts, the dreaded single males, get the proverbial foot in the ass. Is it fair? We don't think so. However, it is what it is, and not likely to change soon. I'm sure that everyone has an opinion as to why this occurs (opinion/assholes being synonymous; everyone has one). Here are a few of our thoughts.... Perhaps one could say that this disparity is due to the fact that most couples are searching for females...either single or part of a couple? This is only PARTIALLY true as there are many swingers that are not looking for singles of either gender. Many couples are, in fact, only looking only for other couples to share friendship and intimacy. Perhaps the old adage "Men are a dime a dozen", comes into play? Well...one has to admit that yes...us guys really are rather numerous. Regardless of being within the Lifestyle or out....you can always find a guy, willing to hump your wife. Go to any vanilla event to find that out. Many might say that all single guys are pushy ass-wads, that lack the intelligence, class, or sophistication to show respect and patience towards a couple that's willing to share intimacy with them. Again, not totally true. We have met many polite, kind and respectful single men. We have also had numerous run-ins with females...both single and married, that have been just as crass, obnoxious and presumptuous as the most obnoxious single guy anyone could imagine. We like to call them the Bi-Nazi's: you know...the "it's-all-about-the-women" types. This brings me to yet another mentionable. There is also an unspoken "assumption", that just because any individual of the female persuasion is involved in swinging...she's automatically "bi-curious", "bi-sexual", or "just doesn't know that she wants to be yet". The obvious outcome of this mind-set is that unwanted advances, groping and attention comes towards the females/couples that are not looking for this type of interaction. Ironically, the same advances made by a male, married or single...would be dealt with severely in most cases. However...with the ladies...many consider it "appropriate", if not expected. Do you see the double-standard? Somewhat hypocritical I would say. Many get so caught up in stereotyping, and outcomes having to look a certain way, they are quick to assign social roles to various members of our Lifestyle. In the process, they forget objectiveness, compassion, and open-mindedness. Isn't that what we, as swingers pride ourselves on, "open-mindedness", and being "out of the box"? Ok..since sweeping swinger social changes (wow, say that fast three times...haha), are not likely to happen...Siren and I elect to manage what we know we can, and that's ourselves. We never expect anyone or anything to be anything but themselves, and let their actions and behaviors be the ultimate factor as to how we interact with them, regardless of marital status, gender, or seeking preferences. J

Are swingers moral? - Who determines what morals are? - [quote]Who determines what morals are?[/quote] The golden rule is good but moral compasses are different therefore many feel as if they haven't been treated the way they would have liked to be by others. Murder is one of the only non-moral actions agreed upon by most societies... Sadly, it is usually determined by this quote from George Orwell... "Who controls the past, controls the future: who controls the present controls the past.'"

Skittles2469fun - Newbies - Welcome newbies. Like you, we were together more than a decade before we got into the lifestyle. We actually talked, fantasized and researched it for almost 2 years before taking the leap. One site we used that had great info is Swingers Board. We've loved it ever since. The main thing you need to do is be on the same page about what you want, what your rules and boundaries are and have fun. Go to parties. Browse profiles and contact those who interest you. Set no expectations for dates, we've found it usually doesn't go how you think it will (good and bad). Avoid anyone you get a sense of drama from. One thing we did from the beginning and do still to this day. After every party, club visit or date, we'd talk about it. What we liked, didn't like, etc. Did we mention have FUN!!!!!! Also, don't take rejection personally. It happens to pretty much everyone. Oh yeah, HAVE FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!

Know any Mormon swingers in SoCal? - Single girl in SoCal wants to know! - [quote=NASTY4U2]Too bad we're not LDS. Because of our lack of religious beliefs, we have no moral nor family values.[/quote] Now this is funny. Well said