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Poly-Swingers - Moving beyond FWB relationship - [quote=BENT]SUMINDYFUN: To attempt to better answer your question, this is what we've experienced/learned in our poly-type relationships...
This is so much more of a complex subject than just a quick "blurb", we like to compare it to guessing a 4 combination lock, you know at least 1 or 2 of the correct numbers... but do you really??? You find out an amazing amount about YOURSELF through this process!
We have seen just about everything emerge, from complete unbelievable bliss to complete unbelievable hurt. However, what we've learned is TOTAL honesty, trust, respect, patience and absolute untethered communication are key! These things can either make or break it and breaking it earlier rather than later is a good thing, because if it breaks later then it usually means one or more people missed one or more of the fore-mentioned items and will cause much greater hurt because of all the time/work that was put in by the others.
BTW, apparently the bliss is much more powerful than the hurt because we keep trying and trying for some reason? Yep, its like a drug and we're addicted! This is why we dont fault any one for not wanting to "step through that door" so to speak. We suggest to any one that they open that door very, very slowly and even walk away for a bit before entering fully.
ABCMAN: You hit the nail directly on the head... from our experiences, social conditioning is extremely difficult for most people to overcome.[/quote]
Thank you BENT! We agree with you 100% on the honesty and communication aspect. We have been so happy in the year we have been with our couple, but there have been some bumps and mis communications along the way. Fortunately we were able to deal with them and learn from them rather well. We realize that a Poly relationship is very complex and risky, but the rewards outweigh the risks for us. Wishing you guys good luck in your search!
Alternative ways of connecting. - - You can also try various dating apps. They are hit or miss, but we have had some success with them in the past. There are several that are targeted at swingers/ethically non-monogamous couples like Feeld and 3fun. Okcupid has also opened up and will let you and your partner link your accounts so that whenever someone visits your profile they can see that you are in a relationship with "Bob/Jane" and can check his/her profile out at the same time.
A party in Naples - anyone interested - Well we would LOVE to since Naples is our home town of 20 years!!! Unfortunately we won't be visiting then and we are moving to NC in 2 weeks! Anyone wanna welcome some Utah swingers to the great state of NC???
D and B
P.S. Beard...one day, yes we will meet :-)
First time flop rule - it happens - i have thought about this. we are newbies and havent even met up with a couple yet (there arent many swingers in our area apparently) we get the 'what if' thoughts. 'what if we dont click?' or 'what if we do click, everyone gets along great and we chicken out?' i mean were not shy, maybe were just nervous cuz were 'virgins'?
We have heard about it many times........... - Couples that are swingers - I don't kiss and tell but I am so angry.....this was the second time we played. I should have known but they said they were quiet and we just assumed they needed to get to know us and open up. They sure talked a lot pre 2nd playtime how fun it was gonna be etc. The guy asked the girl to leave in the middle of it without any explanation!!! Our intention of this post is only to avoid this in the future. We are really a fun couple and are very disappointed. We look forward to more mature, secure couples to get to know. Obvousily they weren't ready or on the same page. We really want all the couples that we play with to be 110% comfortable and both parties are into the situation and want to play.
tips on playing alone ? - - If the co-worker isn't aware up front that you and your wife are swingers, then her playing with him is NOT Lifestyle related.
It's adultery.
If the shoe were on the other foot, wouldn't YOU want to know that YOU were part of an experiment?
If - and I repeat [b]IF [/b]- I were sleazy enough to fuck a married co worker, and then later be invited to play with her and the hubby, I'd tell them BOTH to fuck off.
For crying out loud, people - isn't there still some degree of integrity involved in being in the Lifestyle?
dancing - - According to the rumor mill, Habits is where the swingers go to go clubbing. My wife and I usually go social ballroom or swing though, when we go out dancing.
Who is going to Younge swingers week HEDO? - anyone going? - From what I have heard Hedo is the most SM friendly resort, does anyone else know of any others? I am planning on having about a month between jobs this year and want to do some traveling.
Meet swingers in Tooele - Where do the swingers hang out in Tooele? - I'm pretty sure that Tooele swingers usually hang out in the super swanky high end night clubs in Urda. I could be wrong though.
Swingers - Looking for colorado swingers - Awesome thank you
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