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Game ON....which sign is Hornier...(is that a word?) - zodiac signs of swingers? - wow, am i the only Leo? I figured being a Lion we always come out with a Roar, LOL The MRS is a Libra so she keeps me balanced.
New Swingers Club in Utah - Gauging interest in new club - We do prefer to play out of state, but if the ambience and feeling of the place was exrremly safe and private then we would attend once a month..at least :)
Wear your damn masks! - COVID-19 and your junk! - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]We can’t just wander around COSTCO not wearing a condom and give the people around us an STD. Yes as lifestyle people we are already somewhat predisposed to a somewhat riskier social life than what a lot of other people might find acceptable for themselves. With a virus that’s airborne it’s not that difficult to pass it along with out the consent or such close proximity a sex to those around us. Hence, the mask recommendations. Swingers that don’t understand respect an or consent, will tend create drama.[/quote]
Amen. Particularly the last sentence in your opine.
That little nudge many of us need - - We think honesty is the best way to be. If she found out about the meeting without her knowledge, your tryst into the lifestyle may be over. Plus, she might feel the pressure to play at some point anyway. Also, she will always wonder if the next meeting is arranged without her knowledge.
Evildoers is correct in meeting with zero chance of playtime. Take their advice. She will feel more relaxed and could enjoy herself with the pressure off. We will take it a step further:
Step 1: Set up a date with ZERO playtime opportunity and let the other couple know that. Do something fun (a hike, Topgolf, etc) and get to know them. At the conclusion of the date, let them know that if they do not receive a message from YOU within 24 hours, you don't feel you are a match.
Step 2: If you send a message to meet again, let them know your intent and your boundaries. For example, (kissing ok), (fondling ok), (bi kissing ok), (same room, separate room, either room ok), (nudity ok or not). But, speak honestly with each other about this. It's not nice to lead people on after you have committed. At the conclusion of the date, let them know that if they do not receive a message from YOU within 24 hours, you are not ready to go further.
Step 3: If you send a message to meet again, let them know what is acceptable. For example (full swap or soft swap), (same room, separate rooms or either ok), (kissing or no kissing), (bi play) etc. Again, you will have to be honest with yourselves if you can do this. By a third date, the other couple has invested a lot of time in you. So, be nice and don't lead them on. Enjoy the playtime. Save enough time for the afterglow sex with them relaxing, chatting, and laughing.
By this point, you may have found a couple that you can see multiple times. Doing vanilla activities with them might be a bonus. They may even introduce you to their lifestyle friends too.
The other option is attending a house party where play is not expected. You will be able to speak to several couple and perhaps, use the process above. Or you can play that night.
When we entered the lifestyle, we never had that couple who could mentor us. After we considered ourselves as no longer newbies, we became the newbie "whisperers" to offer what we never had. However, we've gotten away from newbies since our circle is with experienced swingers now. But with covid, we would date newbies again.
Age - New to the swingers community - is age a factor in how a couple is viewed? - Wow! It's adorable to read the comments of those 20 through 40's. We remember those years. There are times that memories of incontrolable thrusts and unconscious passion give pause, but experience... though overstated is under-rated. Though there are some "young'uns" out there that appreciate the gentility of exploring "water flow naturally to seek its level, impulses more often drive than draw." A young, (or young in experience) lady sometimes welcomes a partner who has gotten past the self-serving impulses of youth. As well, a young buck who seeks to find his stride can benefit from being unthreatened by the challenges of unknown expectations and often finds the same growth. The true deciding factor is, "are you into the trip, or just obsessed with reaching a destination you've never been to? A true sensualist finds pleasure in the textures of a rose petal and burlap to be different... but equal.
How would you respond - - Yeah we've come across those cheating singles as well. Either married or have a g/f whom doesn't know. Last SOB story was she had a medical condition and couldn't have sex anymore, however it was ok for him to play as LONG as she wasn't aware of whom it was with. Most recently we had a profile name and description that appeared to be a couple. ID name on other swing-site was " Nicecple4fun " Turns out its a single male looking for a nice couple for fun ... it takes all kinds. We don't feel you did any thing wrong, just the mentality that swingers are cheaters and single guys feel that its pretty ez to poach. We have had several single guys participate with us however we generally meet them at LS events or house parties. Can't really say we've had any luck on any site with a single guy. They attempt to rationalize it away any way they can and feel like they are correct LOL and some just plain rude about it. " he likes fishing and she doesn't ...." wow I guess with that mentality she can take up quilting and cheating too, since I'm sure he doesn't probably like sewing in any form...
Interracial Fun - Taboo Or Good Fun? - My favorite ones are the ones who are trying to explaing the \"moral\" aversion to interaccial dating while posting his wife neked on a swingers site. I mean come on. Are you kidding? Interracial dating \"bad\" Butt Naked group sex \"good\"? You need to think about what you\'re saying before you say it. I try and steer clear of moral right and wrongs, but i think in this case you guys are treading on some thin moral ice.
Funny but thin ice
What's wrong with this??? - Taken from a live profile. - just had to ad a reply to this if you listen to what swingers have to say is you BOTH and i mean BOTH have to be in it together one mate canot do it just to please another it will ultamitly tear the relation ship apart if another couple is trying to convince them then theey to they too must other motives i can see nothing but problems for them she wll feel used and resentful aftwer a time and maybe even guilt all will play haveoc with the relation shipand she will miss trhe true intent to have fun just my humblreopioinany newbes i have ever talkesd to I just tell them streight out you both must be in thisd together
How to find other swingers - - If we're in a crowd of people and we want to find others, we wear our shirts that say "We love the lifestyle". The words are not in big bold letters across the front and back of the shirt and on a mens shirt they appear on the left chest and on women's they appear across the middle of the shirt.
To most straight couples they wouldn't even know nor pay attention since the words are not just "out there" - they are tastefully done. BUT - others in the lifestyle will pick up on them immediately.
Ways to point out Swingers in public - - My wife bought me a super cool chevron stack ring (3 rings that stack together) by David Yurman. The middle ring is black. I wear it on my right hand and sometimes pull the 2 silver rings off and just wear the black middle ring. I’m always on the look out for black rings. We have some friends that wear them.
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