Otis Swingers in Massachusetts

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Why do they run? - Why do most couples run when you suggest a real full swap? - Yes, some responses do seem to be a bit \"hostile\" as someone put it...(and I\'m sure mine is about to sound the same)...but maybe that is because they may have felt attakced by the originator saying they must be insecure. How about instead of judging the \"security\" of a couple by saying, \"they must be insecure if they don\'t want to do this...\" consider that there are as many ways to swing as there are swingers. Yes, some people develop their boundaries based on \"insecurities\", others simply because of what they like and desire. We just aren\'t in this to go off and play around with other people, this is something we share and enjoy together. If you are into that, that\'s fine, but don\'t judge others because they aren\'t.

Calling all losers! - LS and club scene - ...........................................I am bored on a Sunday, so going to waste a bit of time. :) I have said this before and I will mention it again here. Often times people are looking for a black and white answer, a "this" or "that" or they tend to pigeonhole themselves into a place that feels comfortable to them. It is great that people can search for and find people of similar interests. The original question was why is the Utah scene so closely related to the club scene. To me, that isn't necessarily the way things are and so I am responding to shed a different insight into the question. How big is the club scene in Utah? I don't feel it is that big. We have the Moose Lounge on Fridays on a regular basis, we used to have Habits and then we have the parties that happen once a month or less frequently, such as the Sinful parties. Give or take a few other club locations and attendees. The average attendance at the Moose Lounge is around 80 people every Friday. My guess is that this number is well under 10% of the swinging population in the area. Just estimating. This only happens once a week. If we only consider the weekend as play time (Friday and Saturday), which is also an inaccuracy since people do meet weekdays and Sunday as well, that means that only 5% of the population of swingers is actually attending the swinger club scene on the weekends. Certainly not a majority by any means. Sinful is definitely a club scene. And maybe we should define "club". I will say that is an environment where there is a DJ or another form of music, often times on the loud side as people like to dance, has a dance area for such activities, and typically doesn't open until 9 or so at night. Sinful probably hosts on average 150 people on average (S&A, don't get mad if this number is off,lol) and these happen maybe once a month. Lets just round this high and say that is 20% of the swinger population. However, many that attend the Moose and other clubs are the same that attend Sinful. Similar crowd and often an overlap. So still nowhere near a majority, or even a large percent. In fact, quite the opposite. This scene is well in the minority. So I am submitting that this really isn't and accurate assessment of the situation and based on more of a sense or feeling than actual fact. What this tells us then is that most of the people in the lifestyle are not meeting at clubs and are not necessarily dancing and staying up until all hours of the night but are finding other avenues where they meet. What other options are out there. Venus Game night, Kandy K, Sensual Massage... These venues are not club scenes, are a relaxed place and quiet enough to talk without "using hand signals". There still might be music and a dance floor, but there are certainly quite areas to talk, socialize and sometimes even fuck, if that is your scene. I would estimate that as many or more people attend these type of events and for most of these it is an older crowd who is more apt to be in bed at an earlier hour, though that is also an assumption and assumptions are obviously a poor way to derive information or determine a truth. I would question if any of the people in this forum have attending these more mellow parties and what they didn't like about that. The loud music is gone, it is a great way to meet many nice, non-pushy people with similar interests and since the crowd is a bit more mature (probably not the Venus parties) then there would be people of similar interests there. Now it may be of benefit of the party hosts to start earlier, say 6 or 7, so the activities can finish up earlier and I'm sure the hosts would entertain that if it was a common complaint. Apart from these types of parties and club scenes the only other way to meet people in a group setting are house parties, although keep in mind the Sinful hosts to things outside of the club but the crowd will usually still be the same people who attend the Sinful Club parties so are probably younger and okay with staying up late and partying, so probably not for the majority of people responding on this forum looking for an early-to-bed group. Let's talk about house parties. The ones we host sometimes have upwards of 60 or 70 people. These are people we have met before, for the most part, and we don't invite random people to these. We have an area to dance, music, but also areas that are quiet. The party starts around 7 and goes until... whenever. 6 am at times, but many leave before that. These aren't orgy parties and people don't show up expecting that. We also do game nights where we have 3-5 couples over for games, drinks, no dancing, hot tub, etc. Also people we know. We have been to many house parties as well and it is usually people we have met before. We are very leery of parties where there is some expectation to show up and fuck. We avoid these. Not our scene. But these house parties are out there. The doors close at 9, naked by 10, fucking by 1015. You are expected to fuck someone. Definitely not for us but definitely an okay and acceptable thing for others. Judgment is such an incredibly hypocritical thing in the lifestyle and I am astounded by how many people judge others. It is one thing to not enjoy a certain thing and to stay away from it, but it demean it, negate the validity of it and try to reduce the people who do it is completely asinine. My point is there is a variety, a full spectrum to every aspect of the lifestyle. From people looking only to make friends to people only looking to fuck. There is no right and wrong or black and white. We have so many good friends now that we feel super fortunate and blessed every day. But how did we meet those friends. Here is the key. Through hard work. Through dinner dates, clubs, social events, house parties and networking. Remember, this is my opinion, so please, readers, don't get offended. If you limit yourself to one avenue your success will be limited and you will have very few options in finding that fun couple that you click with. Many of our friends that we have met at a club typically like to be in bed at 10, or sometimes like to stay up late. Some of the people we have met in the most casual environment turn out to be crazy, fun party animals. I'm not saying if you don't attend the clubs you won't find what you are looking for especially since we have already determined that the club scene is so small. What I am saying is that if you are expecting a one-stop shop, or a fix-all, your success will be super limited. Your goal, I believe, is to meet as many people as possible and then sort through those you like and don't like until you are satisfied with your results. If you label the "club scene" as negative in your own mind, you might also be inadvertently labeling other fun activities and only reinforcing the confirmation bias you already have. Don't limit yourself to one way of finding friends, especially since it sounds like it isn't working that well for you now. We have found friends in every imaginable situation. Single dates, group dates, vacations, house parties and yes, clubs. I know our way works simply by the amount of amazing people that surround us and we call friends, and yes, some friends with benefits. Taking the time to start a topic is a good idea. The people on here all seem to have a similar interest and maybe some of you will take advantage of that, meet, and if things align, you make new friends. Maybe there is a need for a group to form that meets around 6 and finishes around 10 where only wine is served and only soft music is playing in the background. If so, take the initiative and form such a group. Create your own success. Maybe there needs to be a better way to post smaller events where only a few couples are going camping, coffee drinking, or similar. And maybe it is on Swingular and just not being utilized correctly. I'm sure with enough feedback the site could be fitted with such a feature. So don't despair. There are many, many people with similar interests and needs. You just have to find them. Each scene and venue has positives and negatives. Try to focus on the negative and utilize the resources that they are and you just might find your holy grail of FWB or what else it is you are looking for. Good job on the topic and hopefully that perfect couple is just around the corner. Mr. SRO...................................................................................................

Kik group for UT swingers. - Contact me if your interested in joining a KIK group for Swingers - Definitely interested.. how do we join? Kik needed?

Boise swingers? - Any out there? - Rough here in Idaho Falls area as well. We do travel a lot and would love to meet the right couple halfway, or plan an weekend at either end of the road. We have a cabin near Yellowstone that is wonderful to host in.

What are swingers really looking for ?Are they looking for frien - Has the happen to you. - ok now it is time to be blunt you all appernlty dont know what this is about nor have you got a clue i do realize that you are new but other people have said the same thing to you over and over again not only on this thread but others that you have posted like i belive that cplinjax said if i missed spelled the name i am sorry but people come here to expolre thier wants and desires with like minded people whatever thier comfort level is with others in this area is completly up to the couples in question but from everything you say it seems that you either try to justfiy or explain your stance on what you are looking for i think you two should talk and try to look at it from another persons point of view of what you are sayin you might learn something

Logan - Vasa gyms - [quote=EVILDOERS]As to the second part of your question, we haven't actually played AT the gym since the old Sports Forum in Woods Cross was open. We used to occasionally sneak into the spin room when the gym wasn't crowded and do naughty stuff. Only once with another couple tho. [em]Emo_82[/em] [/quote]Thats hot. We should create a swingers only gym 😀!

Single Males vs. Unicorns - this is ridiculous - This site is no different than any other swingers site. I'm afraid that you will find good and bad in all groups, be it single males, single females, or couples. There are those that give their perspective groups a bad name, but unfortunately, little can be done about it, as it can be hard to verify who is for real and what someone's intentions are, without knowing them in person. In my time in the lifestyle, I have observed...single males who were actually in relationships but looking for secret side action, single females, who seem to have a husband/bf who's looking to join...but she still lists as single, and couples who believe that simply because they bring someone along to a party...it gives them free range to do as they please. On the flip side, I have met some very nice people from all 3 groups as well. My point is...all 3 of these groups have their roles in the lifestyle, but until a foolproof way comes along of determining who's for real and who's not...we will all have to deal with the good and the bad. As others have mentioned though...if you are object to a particular group and don't want to hear anything from members of that group...block/ignore them. Just remember that you are throwing out the good along with the bad.

Those damn single men! - Where do they fit in this lifestyle? - T4Real I dont see Sexypoker hating anyone. He has said that from his experiences, be it at a club, private party, and I'm sure out in public, that men hit on his wife, and dont take NO for an answer. I have no doubt you have had play partners who you've been out with, and even with you standing right there, the idiots are still hitting on her, and dont want to take No for an answer. It happens in *straight, gay, lesbian, and swingers* clubs. I know several swing couples who prefer to hunt for play partners in the *straight* clubs. There is a huge gallery of men to choose from, most willing to play even if hubby wants to watch. We are all here because we LOVE sex, and we want multi partners.

Just for shits and giggles? - Why are you in the lifestyle? - To be honest, I used to be one of those narrow-minded people who thought those in open marriages, swingers, etc. were just people who didn't really love their partner or couldn't "handle" a committed relationship/marriage. Wife and I then discussed the possibility a few years back, my reasoning being that before her, I really hadn't been with many women, and the ones I had been with was more a one time or several times thing, so my experiences were limited, and now that I had "learned what I was doing" a little, my mind was curious on if it was just that my wife loves me and was attracted to me, or if I could please other women. We decided after discussions to try it out. We met up with a couple that was more experienced, thrilling, and the whole experience was a roller coaster ride. Years later, while watching a particular episode of "House, M.D." that deals with a couple who is either in an open marriage or swingers (can't recall), listening to the medical staff characters assassinate the idea of nonmonogamy the way I used to with short-sighted, unfair logic, it made me reflect on how much our views on something can do a 180 when we give it a fair shot. From this, I started wondering things, one of them being whether I actually "knew" if I was straight or not, or just assumed through society and toxic masculinity. I decided that the only way to know would be to open myself up to the idea of trying it and seeing what happened. Through that, I found out that I am at least bi-curious. I've had one sexual experience with another man, and it was both pleasurable and memorable. Haven't had much opportunity outside of that yet to expand and explore further. I guess what I'm saying is we started this wanting to push our perceptions of things and find out what the reality beneath them was, and through that I have enjoyed becoming open to all sorts of new possibilities I never would've imagined. I can't wait to see what the world throws me next to test what I think I know. Thanks all who made it through the novel, I know I rambled a bit. Not a lot of safe spaces to discuss things of this nature out there.

Poly-Swingers - Moving beyond FWB relationship - Ever seen Zebra Lounge? Give that movie a whirl!