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A&E New show about swingers... - neighbors with benefits.... - Ah...great memories of the Real Sex producers running around during the Erotic Ball at the old LSO convention trying to talk Ms. Evil into letting them shoot her in her slutty little costume. They would also have specific "dances" that were pre-announced to be filmed for the program. The dance floor would almost clear entirely when those dances were announced. LOL
Why are there so many swingers from Utah? - - Weve seen that utah and florida both are represented well......now just to get rid of the 1800 miles inbetween them;)
Swingers Vacation Spots - Help us - We prefer Mexico over Jamaica. You get more for your dollar in Mexico. Hedo is so commercialized nowadays that in our opinion isn't any fun and whoever pointed out that Hedo isn't a lifestyle resort is correct. It is a clothing optional resort that has become popular with lifestylers that is all. I think that the only way to ensure that you will meet other like minded people would only go if you know of a resort takeover or you take some lifestyle buddies with you. Otherwise you will run into people that are just mostly into the nudist thing. The only time that we would even consider Hedo is if there was a lifestyle group doing a take over or at least a partial takeover. There really aren't any resort other than one that I can think of in Mexico that strictly caters to the lifestyle and personally we don't endorse that resort at this time due to a lot of issues they need to rectify. "J"
Black Rings - Do Swingers really? - These are the only black rings that we're aware of that give you slightly more than a 50% probability of identifying a swinger.
[img]https://www.extremerestraints.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/640x/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/s/p/sp130-new2.jpg[/img]
We're Back!!! - Hi there! - [quote=Starlights]Makes me wonder how many viable, sincere hits you two get with such a specific search criteria. You don’t consider yourselves “swingers”, but you’re on a swinger site looking for an exclusive relationship… from my own personal experience and from what I’ve seen with others, this type of relationship with another couple burns short but bright. I always caution couples we know when they come across other couples that change their minds from a sexy fun friendship to trying to back them into a serious “exclusive” relationship… excluding all other friends they’ve made in this LS along the way. It can be a drama filled and painful road. I’m sure of the 6 couples you’ve dated over the years you can attest to that if you’re being 💯 honest to yourselves.
This type of relationship should be (imo) found organically and mutually if that’s what it ends up being… Saying you want to be exclusive with a potential swinger couple from the start, while upfront and honest, can sound forced and rigid. Some of the stories of possessiveness between couples just sound absurd to us given the LS they’ve chosen.
In any case, good luck with your search.[/quote]
👍 I get that. If I'm understanding Candyrocks criteria, I can empathize with them though. We feel similarly challenged in that we haven't much interest in couples whose focus is bouncing from couple to couple. At the same time, I realize that the relationship we hope to find is like looking for a needle in a haystack. Adding to that challenge is our location, and, more these days, the time.
Our search might be narrow enough that we're dooming ourselves of any adult fun with others. But, if we settle for something that doesn't closely fit what we're hoping to find, it would seem we were not being true to ourselves, or the other couple.
Swingers of Color - - We're here too AND sent you an email awhile back...never got a response from you...Oh well...So maybe you just arent looking?
Mixed Lifestyle Parties - - [quote=Cpl4Fwb][quote=WEWNT2PLAY]Although for those that would be concerned about being outed in the LS, what is the overall concern? I mean if I'm considering this type of party it's not like the bishop or pastor is going to be there, and the likelihood of being seen elsewhere would be slim to none.
None the less they are valid concerns and now I have to decide what to do.[/quote]
We are only speaking for ourselves here ...
Discretion - we would prefer to choose to whom we reveal our lifestyle actives with. Even on lifestyle sites and other social media sites, we enjoy a level of anonymity. We control what and to whom we reveal more identifying information (face pictures, names, contact info, etc).
Yes, there is a risk in going to lifestyle events and parties. However, most people in the lifestyle believe in mutual assured destruction. If someone tells their vanilla friends, "Hey, I saw Dave & Danna at a swinger party.", their vanilla friends would probably ask, "What were you doing at a swinger party?"
In our time in the lifestyle, we have run into three co-workers, two high school classmates, the mother of a child on our child's athletic team, and a woman who we shared a daily commute with on public transportation. So yes, there is a good chance people may run into others from their vanilla lives in the lifefstyle at some time or another.[/quote]
We agree with most of these comments.
Vanilla people have absolutely no reason to keep LS peoples secrets, and I think they’re more likely to gossip about something relatively foreign to them (like a LS party they attended). I’ve had two vanilla coworkers in my office talk about going to The NYer to people watch swingers, and that just made me cringe. I would not trust a vanilla person to keep our secret, and even less if we saw them at a “mixed” type of party where any conclusions could be made.
We would rather keep our vanilla friends and our LS friends completely separate for privacy’s sake. No matter how hard vanillas try, most of them cannot wrap their heads around our LS, and just avoiding vanillas while pursuing our LS hobbies is our safest bet.
Being fully open to the world about being a swinger is absolutely not something we want in a couples friendship either. We would avoid that as much as we would avoid any chance of vanillas finding out about us. Guilt by association could be just as harmful to our personal and professional lives.
As was said above though… your party, your friends. Just make sure all your LS friends are aware of what you’re doing. Some may not care, some could absolutely care if vanillas were there.
Being Polite - - I have found that alot of people do not respond to sent e-mails. I have showed interest in several people and offered to send them to a site that I have some pics posted on. I work with the public and have had several people recognize me from swingers sites and I have lost at least 1 job from posting pics. So I do not put pics up anymore. Please give those of us that can\'t or won\'t put pics up a chance or let us send you a pic by some other means. Sorry I think I may have posted this twice. My computer is shutting down on me .
Swingers cars??? - What ya driving?? - Kia Optima, Dodge pickup and Softail Night train
what if I want to but he doesn't - - [quote=NU2THEGAME]the worst part is that I consider myself intelligent with good common sense, so why can't i repress this- why is this so important to me right now? my hormones are taking over my common sense!! don't want to ruin a marriage for a cheap thrill- but also know that sex is a very important part of a marriage... part of it i'm sure is that I've been with him since i was 14..... i know this.[/quote]
There are many little things that we all do without that do not really affect our lives to any degree. But sometimes the little things turn out to be really big things. I would say that you have found one of yours.
I sounds like you are telling us that you everything your husband wants sexually. But there is something you need that you are not getting sexually. We could guess as to what that is but it would not help to guess. You need to examine and define what it is that you are lacking. Otherwise all we can do is talk in generalities. Some people only feel safe when things are neatly defined and unchanging.
I think that most swingers will tell you that sexually we get into a rut or pattern with any lover and that for many of us that is like the end of life. Most will also tell you that this lifestyle helps to keep you feeling alive and part of the world. You learn knew things from different people and your world opens wider.
Marriage changes how many think or act. Why that is would take many pages off topic. A marriage like good government should be one of give and take and compromise. Once one side had decided not to compromise or find a solution that makes their partner happy, then they have decided that the marriage is no linger important.
As an example: A woman once told me that after marriage her husband only touched her once a year on a specific day. The rest of the time he was a cold fish. That is all he wanted and what she wanted did not matter. In a way that was sexual abuse of the worst magnitude. To choose a celibate life for one
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