Harlan Swingers in Kentucky

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Evil's latest poll. Fellas, would you ever... - - [quote=CHEFFETTE][quote=EVILDOERS]Naw. Not tryin' to be the Soup...er Sex Nazi. Just wanted to try to understand where some of the attitudes about male bisexuality and swinging come from. I find it extremely interesting how much homophobia still exists in the world and how much exists in a community of people dedicated to sexual freedom. I find human nature fascinating and especially when that nature is something that is more or less taught rather than innate. [/quote]In the three months + I've been reading here all I can come up w/ to explain certain members' homophobia and continued, idiotic comments is this is a male-dominated swinger site and in my experience males feel more threatened by the potential they're perceived as something they don't want to be seen as; you'd think that w/ as much time as they spend w/ their own cock in their hand every single day they'd be less terrified of a cock belonging to another guy, but apparently they must declaim it at every turn or they'll go sterile/bald/teh gayz w/o even TRYING.[/quote] If I were from Maine, I'd say "Ahyup". As I told a girl a couple days back when we were talking about "Sexual Fluidity" by Lisa Diamond, when she said she'd heard that Diamond is working on a new study along the same lines, but on men instead of women, I doubted she'd find much there because, for whatever reason, society has a much more severe taboo against male-male sex than it does against female-female sex. The taboo against women with women was once nearly as strong, but since probably sometime in the '60s it has become much less so. And you're surrounded by society's attitudes, and they're pounded into your head from they day you're old enough to understand anything. And the stronger a taboo, and male-male sex is one of the strongest, the more unlikely it is that you'll get ever rid of it. Physically, sex is a matter of friction properly applied to the correct parts of the body, ultimately resulting in orgasm. So the sex of the person applying it, or to whom you're applying it, really shouldn't matter. But it does. I have absolutely zero homophobia. If I'm in bed with more than one person, and some guy's hand touches me someplace for a second I won't freak out or even care. I understand that I've been socialized into how I feel, and that if I'd grown up in, for example, ancient Greece, I wouldn't have been. I understand that the prohibition of male-male sex grew out of humanity needing to expand as quickly as possible in order to survive, and that the cultural attitudes which that created got written into religions as they developed. I know that there's absolutely no logical reason for it. I know that the "logical" arguments against homosexual sex are nonsense. Like "it isn't natural - you don't see homosexual animals." Bullshit. Yes you do, all the time. I have a hen who's always humping the other hens. She doesn't accomplish anything, but she does it. One of the animals that is genetically closest to humans, the Benobo, a type of chimpanzee, has sex all the time with members of its band (the true swingers of the animal world), male or female, doesn't matter. I know that physically, biologically, there's no reason sex with one sex shouldn't work as well as with the other. I have a really good friend who is a pre-op male to female transexual, and if she ever has the surgery, and becomes physically female below as well as above the waist, sure I'd have sex with her if she wanted to. And I have other friends who are lesbian or gay. And I even belong to and volunteer for HRC (Human Rights Council). I should be a prime candidate for bisexuality. But no, I would not suck someone's dick. Or want some guy sucking mine. Even though I understand that that feeling has been socialized into me, that it probably wasn't predetermined when I was born male, still it's there, and it is what it is. The more emphatically something is socialized into you as you grow up, the less likely it is that you'll ever break away from it, even if you do manage to get away from some of the other things you were "taught". And I think that, Evil is your answer. ~ Terry

Threaded messenger - We want threaded messenger - Risque Soiree is a great site if you like their events, but not everyone that goes to their events are swingers.... Fetlife seems very confusing to us when trying to search for people, and even though there are swingers on the site I wouldn't classify it as a swingers site. And you will find some "damaged" people on there, more so than you would find on a swingers website (my opinion is that there are a lot more single people on Fet that are still trying to figure themselves out. And some fetishes are driven by people that have been "damaged" by others)... Kasidie is better for finding other couples but I've never seen events posted for Utah... this site lacks a lot of things, but it's the only place that posts utah events, and understands the mormon culture... we avoided the Facebook groups for a long time due to discretion, but decided to just create another fb joint account that has no links to our real world.

Ugly people and swinging - - Considering that what attracts one person to another varies wildly from person to person, its amazing that you can make a blanket statement about "ugliness" and "attraction" which you clearly ASSume pertains to all swingers. Also just turning down a couple cuz you personally don't find both individuals in a couple attractive, without discussing with your partner whether or not they might be interested is just rude unless you are both bi and you know that well what they like. My .02 -SG

Why do they run? - Why do most couples run when you suggest a real full swap? - I am certain that insecurity has no bearing on the decisions that we make in regard to the lifestyle. What you are suggesting simply isnt for us. We take so much from being in close proximity to each other during our encounters that it would render the experience...perhaps ackward or fruitless, for lack of a better term. There is a reason that so many couples run from the possibility of what you call \"full swap\". Many years ago when we were first introduced to the lifestyle, \"full swap\" entailed having sexual intercourse with another couple. \"Soft swap\" meant oral play or touching only, no intercourse. Perhaps the deffinition has changed over the years... I am certain that what you are describing is closer to what traditional polyamory is all about. In fact, there is a reason why the couples that you approach about this subject \"run like the wind\" as you call it. More times than not, it has proven to be destructive to the relationships in question. Best intentions or not, we are all human. Shit happens. Most seasoned swingers know this, and avoid this situation at all costs. Most of the relationships that we have seen over the years that were as you describe ended in ruin. Most of the people that we have known to consider this method were (coincidentally) new swingers, who had not yet developed a sense of direction or an identity in the lifestyle. There are some mistakes that you can make in the lifestlye without jeopadizing your standing with your mate. There are some that you simply can not. What you are suggesting to other couples, while it may seem like something that would be fun and cool, has proven to be atleast problematic to many other people. Just our .02 cents. Best of luck to you both. Luvbugs! (mR.) :D

Wishbones - - seems like every swingers club has had the same disscussion with different symbols. getting to the point where you can't wear any kind of jewelry with out being labeled something or other. how about something more club oreinted like a swingular necklace or bumpersticker. there will still be those who would rather be more descrete but something the club should consider. as far as the wishbone? we'll wait and see if it becomes a fad or not.

Swingers - a couples only lifestyle? - Are singles considered to be swingers? - I think over 10 years in the lifestyle qualifies the research. What you're refering to has a lot to being open minded and approach sex as a healthy activity. AGAIN - when you think of the lifestyle and the term "swinging" a single person doesn't fit the description as there is no swapping on both sides.

"LDS" Profile Names - - We used to be Mormons (Well, technically, Ms. Evil still is, I guess.). And we've know MANY swingers over the years who have been involved in recreational non-monogamy (A nice way to say committing adultery. LOL) as well as differing levels of activity in the LDS church. We knew one couple a few years back who would party HARD on Sat. night and still be up early and in the pews every Sunday morning. Invariably they would text us every Sunday evening telling us that they were no longer going to swing...and then about Wednesday of every week they would text again asking us if there were any parties going on the next weekend. LOL It never really bothered us that they somehow justified or practiced some sort of cognitive dissonance when it came to the two activities since most people we know do the same thing but in differing areas of their lives. One of several reasons we chose our screen name was to poke a little fun at ourselves for taking up wife swapping while we were still somewhat active Mormons. I think,perhaps, a more interesting question/topic isn't how many have "LDS" (or some other designation associated with Mormonism) in their screen names but how very many once staunch Mormons have felt a strong desire to flaunt the strict and onerous chastity laws of the Mormon church to actively participate in our little hobby. [em]Emo_12[/em]

Gym Fantasy - anyone else get turned on while working out? - [quote=LOOKIN4FUN369]Any swingers go to the anytime fitness in bountiful? Would love to work out with some couples in the lifestyle [/quote] I go to the anytime fitness in Springville, maybe we could meet in the middle sometime?

Rock Hill or Close by!!!!!!!!! - Whats Up(2 Questions) - We are right outside of Columbia and we reviewed you profile. We found your pics to show you 2 to be an attractive couple and from that we would love to hook up with you, but the rest of your profile is why we haven't contacted you. We are non smokers and look for the same, we also enjoy full swap and enjoy the erotisism of kissing and that is a no go in your profile. We don't consider ourselves major swingers, we enjoy making friends first, enjoy full swap, like others to be shaved, respect my wife to the fullest, no cumming in her mouth, are the main rules we have. They are our preferences and you have yours. We agree there are alot of wanna bees and BS artists on all the sites, but with time you will find a few super cpls that you will become friends with and alot more. But remember you have rules and things that are turn offs to others just like us and well, as we always say "No wine will be served before its time".

This one time at Swingers Camp... - N By N Camp out - Another amazing year at the camp out. Thank you Secret Desires and Risque Soiree for putting together a great event. I'll see you in the woods next year ;) For anyone that has though about attending the camp out it's a great time... put it in your calendars now it's every year the last weekend of July Fri-Sun. Come up for the whole time or just one night.