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Wannabes and net fakes - Will the real lifestyle members please stand up - Well said!----We agree completely. We have another term to add to your list: cyber-swinger. It's a wanna-be that doesn't really have the balls to be in the lifestyle so they hide behind their computer screen. We try to sort them out very quickly. After an introduction email or two we talk on the phone and then offer to meet for drinks. If there's any reluctance---they're done. We have neither the time or energy to waste on cyber-swingers. Fortunately for us they have been the rare exception. We have been lucky enough to meet some wonderful people so far and are looking forward to meeting lots more! ;)
Are we really as judgmental as vanilla people? - - Yes, unfortunately some swingers are as judgemental or even worse than our vanilla counterparts. After taking a break for some time, Jen and I decided to get back in the swing of things. We have recently moved from California to Ohio due to me (Mike) being in the military. Strangely enough, we have found more judgemental people out here than were in CA. At a party that we were at, one of the guests actually came up to Jen and said some mean things about her because of her weight. We ended up leaving early anyway, due to bad weather and a drive home. This discussion came up in another forum of a website that we also belong to as well. Just because we're swingers doesn't mean you have to play with somebody you don't find attractive, but you can at least be nice to that person.
What really defines a TRUE swinger? - - [quote=CHUCKSTOE]to us swingers are people who want have fun some want to be friends and have fun, and the single males need to know there place and not be pushy or circle like a vultures. [/quote]
Tell me you just did NOT insinuate that single males are not people who want to have fun and want to be friends...did I really misread that?
And quite frankly the majority of pushy vultures *I* have experienced on Swingular are MARRIED. And not just men either.
Being a pushy vulture is not related to marital status or gender. Just the lack of class and manners.
Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - Oh shit the racist card was pulled... well I guess am fucked since I am a spic or as other might say Bilingual Ni
STD/STI Testing - - Actually it was closer to 1981 When HIV became aware to the medical community in the US if that is what you meant by that 1989 date. http://www.avert.org/aids-history-america.htm
HIV and HSV are the two nasties that should be of most concern for most swingers as they are incurable and HIV can be deadly. Both are costly in terms of lifelong medications but also in quality of life. They will be with you FOREVER!
HSV can pass by something as simple as a kiss and or oral.
Do clean test results mean something? YEs and No! Mathematically speaking the risk is related to a pyramid factorial equation. Meaning, for each new partner you have that is untested you are basically adding in the risk of not just that one person (Primary) but all the persons they have been with (secondary) and all the partners that those secondary people have been with etc etc.. HIV has been know to take up to 6 months of lag time from exposure to when it shows up on a test but 90 days is normally considered the standard waiting period. So any primary partner you play with who has been with someone in the past 90 days before they were tested still could have given HIV to you.
Granted HIV is rare. But HSV is not!
HSV cant take 2-3 weeks to show up on test results.
70-80% of the population will test pos for HSV as there are many folks who have the mouth cold sore HSV 1. To keep it simple sometimes in the testing HSV 1 really shows up as HSV2.. SO sometimes this means if you do test positive for HSV 2 it is really only HSV1. This is one reason Planned Parenthood will try to talk you out of this 160$ test
One more thing to add. Most people still think as long as they dont have an open HSV 2 genital herpes outbreak they are good to go. This has been found to not be true. There is a relatively new phenomenon recognized in the scientific community called Viral shedding.
http://herpes-coldsores.com/viral_shedding.htm
Another worry that is rare but possible and I know of a recent case where a person gave someone Oral herpes HSV1 to the genital area of another person.
There is also Chlamydia that everyone almost laughs off because a single dose of meds will cure it! The sad thing is if you got CHLAM you could have got HSV or HIV also as they run together. TO explain this if your had a partner that gave you Chlamydia they could have just as eaisly have given you some other things.
SO what is the safest thing to do. No play with anyone other than your main partner.
But if that is not what you wish then:
The safest thing would be for both Prospective couples to stay monogamous for 90 days and then get tested.
This is all true to the best of my studies but anyone please feel free to correct me.
Disabled Swingers - - Too bad you are so far away. Would not be a problem to us. We would only need to know the situation and limitations ahead of time. We chose when we began that cleanliness and personality would be the things that would limit us. Everyone has a right to enjoy life and the lifestyle. We have only encountered one man who wore a brace. He was great in bed.
Ralph and Fae
Swingular still active/ legit? - Looking for couples or singles - This site is overrun with Single Males whos sole purpose in life seems to be posting Dick Pics. Actual Swingers are few and far between here. I would wait and see how the site update is before paying money.
Playing with \"swingers\" vs \"nonswingers\" - - Something to consider is that non-swingers often view swingers as people who will sleep with anyone as long as they are breathing, hence much of the eagerness expressed on the non-swingers part to be involved. Single males who are into swinging at least understand that they have been chosen and there is such as thing as discretion involved in such encounters.
This isn\'t always the case, but it is something we have experienced with some of our friends who aren\'t swingers that have open enough minds to handle the fact that we are, but don\'t get that we don\'t have sex with any and every available person. If you do decide to go ahead with it, I would suggest that you have a real talk with this guy to make sure he really understands where you\'re coming from and where things are headed (ie. no kissing or anything else and then telling, unless you don\'t mind).
My .02
-SG
Another Swingers Show on TV - - For those of you who use Dish Network. I called and was told that it is not yet on Dish and that a lot of people have been requesting it and added me to the list. So if you use Dish, please call them and request them to add the Discovery Fit and Health channel.
Mexico! Come with us!!! :) - Trying to put together a group of Swingers to go to Mexico with us! - I will have a better idea on prices once I know how many people are interested.It's looking like Spring is a little more expensive than when we went this October but with a big group the price will be lower. So round up all your friends that might be interested and once I know about how many people want to go I can call and find out what the group rate would be for that size of a group. I think they are also opening a resort in Montego Bay this winter so I can look at the rates there too since that might be cheaper. Let me know your thoughts and I'm hoping to see more responses as the weather gets colder and we all want to run away to the sun ;)
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