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LDS Swingers Survey - Will any former/active LDS swingers take my survey? - done and fun

Why are people afraid to give out their email address - -

KUTV News Story on Swingers - News - [quote=DELICIOUSLYWET]Gasp! Tens of thousands of swingers here in Utah. I believe Utah now has a slightly higher-than-average divorce rate. The national divorce rate is 3.4% with Utah slightly higher at 3.6%. The percent of divorced residents in Utah is reported as 9.3% which is the 18th lowest in the nation. Don't ask me how those numbers reconcile. It has something to do with immigration into the state I am guessing. New Jersey reports that 8.5% of it's residents are divorced and that is the lowest in the nation. Well what do you think? Did more than 3.6% of all the swinger couples, that you have met end up getting a divorce? Was it over swinging? Are more than 9.3% of the swingers population divorced? This would include all the singles now swinging that were once married. One woman telling the media how swinging ended her marriage is anecdotal at best. Do I believe she is telling the truth? Yes I do. Do I personally believe swinging ads an extra element of jeopardy to a marriage? Yes I do. Do I believe there are quite a few people that would be happier staying away from the swinging lifestyle? Yes I do. Never-the-less, most of the couples, we have personally met, that are swingers seem to enjoy swinging and frankly enjoy doing it together. Do I believe there are quite a few couples who will enjoy swinging? Yes I do, we certainly have enjoyed the lifestyle experience as do a lot of swinging couples we have met. In the end if you are a married couple you have to make the decision based on the two of you, as to whether or not swinging is a good thing in your lives individually and as a couple. As for statistical models as to the divorce rate within the community of swingers well there aren't any. This isn't really a news story it's sensationalist journalism designed to attract viewers. Anyway, the divorce rate has been going down since the 1980s and swinging has been on the rise since the 1980s so you could make an analogy that swinging is saving marriage. Yes it would be a bunch of anecdotal bull shit just like this story. [/quote] Right. And swinging doesn't end a marriage anymore than cheating or lying or alcohol abuse or drugs, etc; people end marriages. Any relationship is an invention solely created by those people involved and only they have power over its progress forward. Will swinging or discussions about it lead to problems between people in relationships? Potentially. But any attempt by the anonymous lady in the story to blame swinging for anything is an attempt on her part to avoid accountability. You can't blame the alcohol itself for the drunk. PS, NJ may have a lower divorce rate b/c it's one of the few states that still grants annulment instead of divorce in certain cases.

To Bi or not to Bi. - - Society has imposed a morality code on most of us at one time or another be it through religion or laws. Lets admit it we are animals and although we may not act that way often, sex is one of the most basic animal instincts. Acting on those urges if you are a swinger means you can have sex with others and not fall into the societal guilt and jealousy others may feel. When we meet new swingers this seems to be one of the most difficult things to overcome. We do not judge those who are bi no matter whether they are male or female. We are just not into it. She will kiss and fondle breast but its for show not enjoyment. He does mind if men touch because of proximity but he has no desire to be with another man sexually. We do not judge others who do and we have play friends where both male and female are bi and it does not scare us. One last comment about labels. If someone is bi it does not mean they are gay or homosexual or lesbian unless they choose to be. Everyone should be able to choose their own label for their sexuality and who fucking cares what someone else says.

Swingers - a couples only lifestyle? - Are singles considered to be swingers? - I am a single guy, and in my opinioin I am not a swinger. I am just here to find a good time. I agree that swinging is between a couple, so I guess a couple that invites a third is swinging, the third is just getting some extra lovin. And about Hugh Hefner being single, he is not. He is officially still married to the mother of his two boys (I actually read this months articles, I swear).

If only you could tell in public who is and isnt in the LS - - [quote=fourplay][quote=DARINTRICIA]There are phone apps that can show when others are nearby. I use one for hunting with the people I hunt with. So someone just needs to develop an app.[/quote] Super good idea![/quote] Several apps like that HAVE been developed. One was actually offered to members of another swing site we're on. It failed miserably because people wouldn't, for various reasons, use it. We never used it personally. Some people apparently thought the potential for being outed as swingers was too great to risk using it. Another app was written by a friend of ours and it supposedly had some safeguards in it that he had designed but Apple wouldn't allow it in their app store...I guess because it's purpose was to help people swap spouses. \_(ツ)_/¯

Same Sex Marriage - If you support - Well to make clear this is the MRS part of Stitchutah, I can't speak for him. As for me, I have to admit there are some of you whom posted that make some good points, and then there are some that make no sense to the forum at all. LOL! I really like some of your opinions and you make good points, such as Kinbaku, Thoughtgarden, and to some extent REally98. I have to say though that even though I have read every post to this topic I really don't know where I stand on this issue of same sex marriage. I have to be honest and say, I am torn. Some of you can respect that and others will bash it, but either way.....its just honesty. I really like Kinbaku's point about who are we as swingers to judge a non traditional marriage when none of us married couples that swing and have open marriages can be considered "traditional" to the rest of the world. Infact, there are a lot of those outside of swingworld that place high judgement on our choice of lifestyle just as they do same sex marriages. ONe of you commented on (I can't remember who, maybe it was TR) or rather, asked how those that didn't agree with same sex marriages would feel if they couldn't be married to their spouse legally (excuse me if I got that question wrong, I believe that is how it was put) and I have to say to that.....being on both sides of the fence here, that if I couldn't be married to Mr Stitch, whom I love and cherish and will love and cherish for my entire life (just as I am sure a gay couple feels for their life partner) marriage to him does not change my feelings for him. I would still be with him, I would still love him just the same, my life wouldn't change as far as how I live or feel. I would still have my children and so forth. The only things it would change (which, mind you, are huge and helpful in our marriage) is our legal rights such as tax benefits, insurance (we don't have anyhow, but at least we have the option), and other things that I am not fully aware of I even have rights to. I am sure I take those rights for granited as I am sure other married couples do as well. I don't argue that point, at all. However, isn't there, and tell me if I am wrong, ways around some of those legal issues some of you have brought up (medical rights, when decision can't be made by person) by putting in a living will whom you've appointed power of attorney too? If same sex couples can't legally be married by laws set forth by the government then they just need to take extra precautions to protect what they can. They need to be proactive by doing whatever they can to protect their union. Yes, there are some things they won't be able to do anything about unless the law is changed, but there are some thing they can do, and they should do. Like I said, I still don't know what side of the fence I fall on.....I don't entirely agree with same sex marriage, however, I don't entirely disagree with it either. It to me is a complicated issue, and its very possible that I complicate it myself. Where I agree with REALLY98 ( I believe is their names) is where they state....where do you draw the line? The government has a hand in almost everything we do, including marriage, and there isn't anything we can really do to change that. I tend to agree with the statement that somewhere down the road if we move that line and say...Okay, same sex marriage is legal, then some ppl may argue well, okay, same sex marriage is okay so now, me and my spouse want to be married to our girlfriend/boyfriend or hell the couple we swing with,...... now why can't we do that, marriage isn't defined anymore as just man and women, so why isn't my rights to legalize poly okay? Some may argue, that it would never happen, but I am posistive that if you ask older ppl in the community that if they thought they'd ever see same sex marriage being brought up I am sure they would say HELL NO, we thought we'd never see that day, and yet, here it is! I just thought that was a good point that Really98 made.....now, the whole marrying an animal thing, ugggh, I really hope that day never comes, but then again, you never know what some ppl might do. (GRIN). I, for one, never will judge a same sex couple....nor do I want to EVER seem as though I am judging them. I guess I really don't think there is anything wrong with same sex marriage, truthfully. The conclusion I have made for myself is....I will live my life with my family and do what I can to raise my children to be tolerate, loving, and non judgemental. We try everyday to raise them to make their own decisions based on how THEY feel about things, not what others think (and if you don't think that isn't a task, it certainly is!!!) I think this world is getting to be more and more complicated, and it will only get worse b4 it gets better (no, I am not a dooms day person) and all we can do as parents and as a family is protect whom we love the most that being, eachother, and our children. Thats all, I am sure, everyone wants to do here whether same sex or "traditional" (however you define that) so I suppose we are really have the same agenda in mind, right?

The males of couples I need your help!! - I am trying to understand my husband and male pride.But been that I am not a male this is hard.So please help. - First: We were childhood sweethearts. (At the age of 12.) We are best friends. We have been together for 10 years,been married for 8 years.For the ten years we have only be with each other.Before we were togrther I had been with 5 men (I do mean men.When I was a teen,I went out with men : 18 to 23.) Before we were togrther he had been with 7 girls.I was with one woman and Chris was there but we had to stop before we got started.(she only when down on me and Chris was watshing but then I told him to go down on her,so he did.Then we had to stop because someone was try to come in the room.We were at a house party.This is why we are here. Second: We are in the same place regarding swinging.I only want to be with another woman.I do not want to be with another man.(We both are not ready to have another man with us.)I just thought it would be easyer to fine a couple to do what we want.Then to find a single female.Because every where I go everyone is saying the samething " There are not as many single females looking for coupls as there is couples looking for single females."Please reread the post.It saids that We want to be with a single bi-female..... I only want the women to play and the men to watch...... Third: Nothing can get in the way of our marraige.We would never leave each other.We have been through too much together.At 18 we got back together and we had our frist miscarrage.At 19 we had our frist son and our son and I almost die and we had our second miscarrage and was told by a DR. that I could not have any more children.For 4 year we had sex maybe once a month because it hart to have sex.(When we had sex it was over real fast because he did not want to hurt me.)He never steped out on me.He never thought to step out on me.at 23 we had our second son.What ever was wrong with me was gone because it did not hart to have sex any more.At 25 we had our daughter and I almost die having her.For the past 2 years we have wild sex almost every night.After having kids we finely got our sex life back.Now if only I can get my body back. LOL <(That is a joke Chris loves my body) Chris is the best man out there for me.I should know because I have been looking for a husband since I was 16.All the men I went out with only cared about themselves and what they could get.Chis cares about me and trys to give me everything I want.THAT IS WHY WE ARE HERE.Because he is trying to give me what I want.He is the type of person that would give you the would if he could. Just so you know we as a couple have researched the swingers lifstyle for a year before we as a couple decieded to join the swingers lifestyle. We wrote this together.I just typed it . Candy & Chris

Game ON....which sign is Hornier...(is that a word?) - zodiac signs of swingers? - At our crazy all niter two weekends ago at JJ Western Swing, we started asking people what their sign was. It amazed me that most of the people there playing were either Taurus or the majority, Gemini. Now I know all you Scorpio's are going to jump in here and claim it's YOU. Everyone agrees you are the most promiscuous... but seriously.... I was surprised. I am wondering if Gemini's maintain this professional, analytical front during the week and on the weekend the evil, naughty, nasty twin busts out. Can anyone enlighten me? I do know that I sure enjoyed playing with that guy, which ever twin was taking over!! The game is on! xoxo Tori - Taurus / Tan - Gemini --------- Thanks again for playing the Zodiac Game and for all your kind personal replies to us! After 3 days of posting and 107 responses and 1895 views, here are the totals as of 4-8-09 12:30pm: We have also included "what each sign says after sex" just for fun. ------------ Scorpio 15 =14% -"Let me untie you!" Gemini 13 =12% -"It was good! Let

WTH over? - Private picture debacle. - I guess I'll play the devil's advocate for a second and share an opposing point of view. And this isn't meant to be offensive, just presenting another way to look at the initial question/complaint. First off, and I've mentioned this time after time in different posts, there is no one correct way to swing, to post a profile or to live a swinger life. If your opinion (and I don't mean you, as in the poster of the thread, just a generic term) is that people should show their faces and it irritates you if they don't, that's a fine opinion to have, but it's just that, an opinion. If you are in a position in your life that you don't mind if friends, family and co workers know you swing or see graphic pics of you, possibly from another source other than you sending them, or from a random search through a swinger website, that's great. It might be empowering and refreshing to some degree. However, some people don't feel comfortable with that or may actually suffer harm to their reputations, face loss of income or have other unwelcome things happen to them. It has happened to people and the threat, even if just perceived, feels very real to some. We live in a prejudicial society that places its values and norms on others and sometimes punishes those who don't comply with that version of normalcy and moral behavior. It seems an understandable worry to me and to others. " If you’re truly worried about “your job” or others seeing you than maybe you’re in the wrong place?" That doesn't make much sense to me. Though taking a break now, we have been successful "swingers" for many years and we were always careful and had a worry about certain people finding out. We know many, many others who feel the same, so to say we might be in the wrong place doesn't hold much water as anything other than your preference for who you meet or how you prefer a profile to look. As with all aspects of life, but let's direct this to swinging, there is no black and white, right or wrong. Personally we have always tried to bend our preferences, to give people the benefit of the doubt unless there was a glaring red flag or we were not in the least attracted because of what we read, profile pics (attraction) or something else that wasn't attractive or inviting to us. But no worries. There are a lot of different people with different needs and expectations. It is always fun for us to expand our prejudices, learn new things, try new things and step away from a list set in stone that we need to follow. That being said, we have our own preferences and opinions on what we are looking for, but that's all they are. We understand some people want to meet and fuck after a quick hello and exchanging a kiss. Some want more of a poly relationship. Some will never play in the same room while others demand it. There us a beautiful spectrum to life, to swinging to...everything. Just my opinion, of course. You may limit meeting some amazing people by creating strict rules about what you expect, especially related to profiles. Many new couples are super sensitive about even being on the site. But if that is what works well for a couple, great. That's how they do it. It would be wonderful to be in a place where we could all be honest and open with everyone we knew. But we don't and we can't, or perhaps it is just we choose not to because of the severe consequences we may face. I respect people's choices to progress at their own speed, to exchange face pics when they feel comfortable with it and to feel safe in the situation they are working in. For us, and the way we know many of our friends do it, the public pics are a little bit of an appetizer. The private pics have traditionally been more sexy and naughty. Then we have 20 or so face pics in the folder that we specifically have to give access to. Our reasoning is that some people want to add you as a friend so they can keep track of you, show interest, or yes, sometimes just see pics. For those pic hunters especially, we don't share face pics unless we are interested. It provides a level of comfort and security for us, even if it really isn't that safe and only gives us warm and fuzzies. It also is beneficial when nosy people are snooping on the site to see who they know, and even though it doesn't worry you, it worries some. Last up, we too have frustrations about certain profiles or they way people progress with their pics and such. But we certainly think they have the right to be swingers in whatever capacity they choose. If we don't like something, get too frustrated, we move on. But we do it knowing the other person or couple is swinging as they choose and we support that. I think the forums can be fun places to share ideas. It's a place to learn about others and see an opinion that you might not agree with or haven't thought about. Or, it's a place to ramble on about not much, so if you have read this far, good for you. :) xoxo Mr SRO