Tecate Swingers in California

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Girls that are into DP - How common is this activity among the swingers? - We do DP often... It is one of my most favorite sexual encounters... Mr Knotty is my "backdoor man" but if we get to know a man very well, he does get to ring the rear bell on occasion once trust has been built...

Fun bar to meet people at in slc - - If you're just dropping in to pick-up a woman (or vice versa) to bang and have a few laughs with over the next few months Club 90 is hard to beat. It's not necessarily a swingers club and I wouldn't expect to meet any without some pre-planning. Basically Club 90 is filled with lots of divorced men and women looking to replace the old schmuck with a new schmuck. Again not a swingers specific crowed, but if you want to meet a lot of single and fun people Liquid Joe's on Saturday night can be a blast, especially if their house band The Spazmatics (or Metal Gods, same group, just different music) are playing. The Crowd at Liquid Joe's probably averages 10 to 15 years younger than Club 90. I have seen folks from the LS community at both places. But it's not what most are there for and you'll probably just be knowledged with a nod if they recognize you... anyhoo... hope the helps.

Single Males - - [quote=CTA313][quote=EVILDOERS] ...get a girl to join you....Not only do you now "bring more to the table", but you have the added credibility that if you can find and finesse a girl into joining you in this little adventure we call swinging (whether it be a girlfriend, a wife, a second cousin twice removed, or just a hot fwb) you might just not be a giant douchecopter.[/quote] Ignoring the need to "finesse" someone and unhealthy gender stereotypes in general, this line of reasoning is a little troubling as it presumes that a male's company is inherently worth less. Or that an absence of semi-romantic relationships somehow speaks poorly of his character. I personally think approaching someone whom you aren't already fairly close with and soliciting to go to a swingers party is a bit out of line. Especially if her company is sought as an accessory to demonstrate to others that he is not, as you say, “a douchecopter”. Call me old-fashioned. [quote=EVILDOERS] I know we can't be the only people who secretly wonder just a little bit about some single guys and why they aren't with somebody. Do they secretly hate women (yes, we've met some that actually do), are they just too lazy (or busy, maybe...but hey, we're all busy) to find someone, are they serial killers and/or just not very nice guys? [/quote] Oh, I hope you are! That's a really unfortunate outlook to have. Promising relationships take time to find, let alone build to the requisite amount of trust and stability to try things like this. In the mean time, I don't see anything wrong with someone pursuing their interests while still holding out for someone worthy of their emotional investment. To me, that behavior is quite attractive should be respected! It doesn't get any better than someone who is confident, self-actualized, and motivated to pursue their desires. Sadly, it sounds their gender influences whether this is seen as a desirable trait. I'm not sure how long you've been out of things (30 years?), but it's easy to forget the struggle when you're comfortable in a marriage. Things are more fluid. People don't feel the need to settle down like they used to. [quote=EVILDOERS]I know many will say they've tried and swinging is a deal breaker for most women. After almost 3 decades in the swinging trenches meeting and talking to other people, both couples and singles, we would disagree....many, if not most, women could eventually come around to the idea of swinging once they feel safe and secure in a relationship.[/quote] This is just confirmation bias if the evidence comes from a sample of people you have met while swinging. [quote=EVILDOERS]...those of us who DID put in all the blood, sweat, and tears into a relationship and allow it to grow to the point of daring (don't think for a second we aren't risking a LOT in opening up our relationships to other people!) to allow others access to our significant other sometimes wonder why some others want to take a shortcut to all the sweet swinging bennies with little or no risk on their own part.[/quote] If you're not comfortable sharing your wife with someone you might view as a potential competition, you definitely don't have to. On the other hand, there are a lot of people enjoy it :) This smacks of the old “you must suffer as I did” chestnut. [/quote] Yes, I agree, "finesse" was a poor choice of words. In my defense, I was at work and rather in a hurry to make a point...that apparently I didn't make well (and my attempts to also be humorous apparently fell flat too). Rereading my post it does smack a little of mild gender bias but I can assure you that it wasn't my intent in any way and most certainly is not my outlook on women, relationships or life in general. My intent was simply to advocate approaching swinging as a mutually desirable activity that two partners desire and share equally in. And not that it matters, but I've shared my wife with probably over a hundred men, married and single, and I've never thought of any of them as competition. But I never thought of swinging as "sharing" my wife either, but instead as her deciding to be sexual with another person and me being totally okay with her decision to do so. Sharing her, to me, almost denotes some sort of ownership or at very least some kind of permission that I would have to give. Both those ideas are not a part of our relationship. Perhaps the concept of "competition" in swinging interactions is a single male attitude? I don't know. And I didn't mean it in any way, shape, or form as a "you must suffer as I did" trope but simply as the idea that we invested a LOT of hard work and time making our marriage what it is and together deciding to risk opening it up to the excitement and also the possibility of harm that is swinging. I think, perhaps, that sometimes single people in the lifestyle don't quite understand the very real possibility of permanent damage (or worse) to the relationship that couples who swing are flirting with. For many (most?) of us, our marriages/relationships are THE most precious thing we have. What, if anything, are you risking? A bruised ego?

swingers defined - - LOVE IT!!! De ja vu

Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - J&J, HAHAHAHA why not corona?? Bunny, You a med pro? -D-

Swingers On-premise Meet and Greet - Social Gathering in Maryville, tenn. - I'm having a swingers on-premise meet and greet in a basement in Maryville, Tn., for the curious and the experienced swinger or newbie wanting to find out more about the lifestlye without any pressures or any obligation. E-mail me for more info. There is a door donation. Thanks, Tammy

couples gf? - has any couples thought of this or had/have a gf - [quote=ABCMAN][quote=ASSETS][quote=VIRANI]is it wrong of me to believe that no girlfriend of a couple should expect anything beyond sex?[/quote] nope. I think the same... if a girlfriend expects more, then she is just setting herself up for a broken heart and disappointment.[/quote] It's not that easy. What if the man falls for the girlfriend. It is possible to love more then one person romantically, it happens all the time. Even friends of mine who have cheated on their wives, still love their wives, it's not just sex to some of these men. Sometimes I wonder if "Swingers" or "lifestylers" get so paranoid about falling for someone that they miss some of the fun that comes with sexual play with those you care about or ...cough...love. Love isn't something that is always controllable or a feeling that always can be tamed. I've read these posts for years, and it happens all the time in the lifestyle. Couple "A" plays with single male or female, they play often, soon one of the couple is in love with the secondary, then all hell breaks loose. I just asked myself, why? That person you fell in love with originally is still the same person, they may love someone else as well, but they in most cases still love you as well. Shut down the social conditioning that tells you it's wrong! So is swinging by the way if you listen to those religious cultural voices. Talk it over with your spouse, let them know it's okay to feel what ever they want to feel. Keep those communication lines open, and often the "fallen" partner will realize they love two and they do not have to love only one person. Sorry for the sermon, but I just cringe when I read these replies where people attempt to deny what makes them fundamentally human. It's okay to love others, even if they are not your spouse. Just remember who you are going home with and who was by your side the last umpteen years.[/quote] I used to work for a MORMON sex therapist... his usual statement" Love is easy... for the most part it requires the right emotion and the right impetus.... It's the RELATIONSHIP that is hard." I love many of the bodies/minds that I've touched... but I've never found a satisfaction better than what I've discovered with a husband of 17 years and our two amazing kids. I don't need anything from outside sources but a chance to see "what's out there..." Perhaps that's the real difficulty... analyzing our motives and admitting our jealousies. For example, I consider myself flat chested... It's why I LOVE encounters with buxom women... but I am willing to admit that my interest comes from a place of jealousy ... I don't ignore jealousies...I use them to my advantage. I am not girlfriend material... Monogamy bores me. But I do fit in with the group of couples who want full honesty.

HAS THIS EVER HAPPENED TO YOU? - - There are a lot of swingers out there that 1) should consider themselves Poly. meaning they want a meaningful relationship with others. or 2) they have spent so much time and energy in trying to find a match that once they do they make bad judgements calls in regard to how to handle the relationship. The best thing to do is lots of communication. However if that does not work run fast. Some people do have attactment issues.

Anyone else in or near Daybreak? - We know you are out there! - [quote=ITSNOTUS]Great idea! I have created a group. I called it Daybreak Swingers, but anyone near here can join. Just looking for people around here. :) Can't wait to meet our fun/sexy neighbors![/quote] If it's a "Swingular" group, you'll find it's not much use. People rarely visit that section of Swingular and all the groups are dead.

camping + swing + rv = FUN - - Anyone knows of a group of RVing swingers?