Pleasant Hill Swingers in California

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Safe Sex - How do you (or don't you) protect yourselves? - We now have the rule that we always use condoms. And we are still shopping around for the best ones that work for hubby. He would prefer not having to use them but not enough that he is going to stop. (Side Note: red condoms can have a BAD visual connotation for some guys) I admit that when we started out we didn\'t use them the first couple of times we played. We then discovered that the first couple we played with doesn\'t use them at all. They had some of the same arguments I\'ve seen posted here. The fact that STD\'s can be transmitted via oral sex, condoms don\'t feel right, etc. I can see those points. But then we found out that they don\'t get tested at all and he picks up random chicks while traveling (with wife\'s knowledge and permision) I think that is the point that makes me the most uncomfortable. Most of the swingers we have met so far are very aware of STD\'s and take some precautions such as getting tested, condoms, etc. But I have seen the statistics on STD\'s in single sexually active people and it\'s like 1 in 4 and most don\'t know they are infected. So he is playing russian roulette in my opinion. We didn\'t know all this before we played with them. So I guess the moral of the story is to talk with potential partners and ask questions!! For us newbies, it may be awkward and feel like you are being crass, nosy, or killing the spark, but the other couple should be willing to at least discuss it or maybe they aren\'t right for you!! Carrie V.

Why Hide Your Faces? - Don't you realize you're smarter than everyone else? - I do like your view of things and I get it, but if there's anywhere to advertise it's here. I'm not telling people to sporadically start telling the world they're swingers; you'll end relationships. Like after telling my wife, knowing the outcome, not telling her sisters how we were during their vacation together. She did, ending both relationshits—one in divorce and the other broke up & moved out. I asked what she told them and it was one line I knew hurt their little traditional relationship minds. "He just said he's not trying to take my 20s away and saying I have to sleep with him and only him is unrealistic". Like I said, it's dangerous expressing the lifestyle. Why? Because it makes more sense than todays definition of love. I'm trying to think if ever a conversation came up toward me having to explain how I am, and none exist other than me telling my mom, "I know the secret to mankind" having to explain.

La2016 - Need advice - I agree with what lookin4fun369 says, but you also need to be prepared to be approached by couples if you venture out into the event space. What you're looking for based on your profile is the same thing that the majority of swingers are also keeping an eye out for... The elusive unicorn. Yes these magical creatures do exist, but they are difficult to corral. There are many that can be found behind the lcd of your computer screen, but to actually entice one into a dinner date, followed up with play time can be seemingly impossible at times! In fact... We had one completely disappear after making a dinner date just hours before this very night!!! Yes... We had communicated for several days and she made the arrangements... Only to disappear in a trail of glitter. Do not be discouraged, as your quest will certainly take you on the adventure of a lifetime... But keep in mind... Sometimes it's the journey, not the destination that the excitement lies. Best of luck!

Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - [quote=UTHOTCPLEXTREME]Ok, yeah HPV is fair enough. But I know we don’t have it. And we’d like to keep it that way.[/quote]Agreed hence the vaccine. Men cannot be tested for it and can pass it onto women unknowingly. To be clear not trying to hijack the discussion by any means. Just pointing out vaccines for such is a good idea especially in group settings where everyone is being a little more free with sharing [em]Emo_94[/em] .

New Swingers Club in Utah - Gauging interest in new club - All, we've been trying to explore this idea for over a decade and there are many legal challenges. There is a public indecency law, even for private clubs. If you have a legal license, and you accept any amount of money, you fall within this law. Trust us, we've been trying to figure this out ourselves as we've been wanting to create something. Right now, the safest avenues are private mansion parties and legal lifestyle friendly and/or off-premise clubs which we are starting to explore. We've been trying to find a club to buy with an existing license for a while I now. If anyone has any prospects, let us know. Rob

Las Vegas - - [quote=TWONAUGHTYONES] Good to know. The one time we were there the upstairs couples only section was closed. They said it was a light crowd that night so it wasn't necessary. We thought the place was pretty full and the pool was very full. Don't think we'll be back as we enjoyed Couples Oasis so much more, but that's just us. [/quote] As we were looking around at the various swingers clubs in Las Vegas before our trip, the Couples Oasis was one of the ones that we considered, but we felt that $80 ($35 for the activation fee and $45 for the party) was a bit steep for one night (with the other things that we had planned for the weekend, one night was all we set aside for going to a swingers club). Maybe next time we will try something different and go to the Couples Oasis. On a side note, as we were conversing with some of the locals about the various clubs, we were told that the upstairs area at the Red Rooster is generally only open on Fridays and Saturdays, which is what they told us there too, so keep that in mind too.

Friend collectors or swingers - - Our post was not intended to offend anyone . Just because we chose to operate our account/profile differently then others does not make anyone more right or wrong. The purpose of our post was to try and develop some knowledge as to why some chose to operate differently. We understand that because our profile doesn’t show our faces, that means a friend request is necessary to determine attraction by exchanging pictures. We do this ourselves, all the time. But we also immediately delete accounts and typically inform those interested if we are not interested. It sounds like we are complaining but in reality we really aren’t. We just wanted to establish conversation and understanding. We have received a lot of friend request because of this post and we appreciate all of them but we are selective as well and we will not accept all of the request if we are not interested. I hope we continue to discuss this issue as we look forward to hearing other thoughts, ideas and suggestions.

Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - We think the problem is that people see the equation "sex = love". IOW, if I have sex with you, I must love you. Therefore polyamory and swinging are the same. After all, if I don't love you, I won't be having sex with you. The way I see it, swinging is like a game of golf or tennis. I might play a game with you but I don't love you. Similarly, I might have sex with you but I don't love you. Poly, IMO, is basically having a relationship with that other person and sex is involved on some level. Kinda like "I'm in love with you and oh, BTW, lets make love" The way we see it, swinging is about exchanging sexual partners for recreation sex. In an orgy situation at a party, you can have sex with that person with zero words exchanged. In a poly relationship, there is a real connection going on besides just sex. Sex becomes incidental just like it is with married couples. With swinging, there is no emotional attachment. Is that a good thing? Well, it depends. We need to understand the very simple nature of things. We do this to avoid that. That is human nature. Many swingers DON'T want emotional attachments and avoid them because of the complications they cause in the first one. Are there benefits to the attachments? You bet. Is there a price to pay for that benefit? But of course. Is it worth it to you? That depends on your viewpoint. In our life as a couple, the problems poly cause BASED ON OUR OPINION (your's may vary and no right and wrong here) do not outweigh the payoff. IOW, we don't think the benefits of a poly relationship are worth the problems it creates based on our opinion. YMMV

Has anyone else in UT seen this new story? - - The funniest part about this is I (Mr) have first hand knowledge of many police officers being swingers themselves. I find a shit load of irony in how they raid parties when they themselves are involved in many of these activities.

Fly-fishing Swingers - New Swingular Group - Strip and Mend?????????