Mount Hermon Swingers in California

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Picky Picky - No not your nose - I'm picky, like probably a little bit unrealistically so. I figure I have the man of my dreams who is hung, smart, fun, charismatic and attractive. I shouldn't settle for less then total attraction. This should be true for all. I realize I'm a old hand at this, been in and out (ha) of the lifestyle since 2011, and I've basically done all the things, but if you're with your perfect partner then my understanding is swinging is an enhancement to your sex life. Never settle for less (old swinger advice for the newer swingers) just to have a new partner/experience/taking one for the team. What are your thoughts?

Where did it go? - - OMG....some of you amuse me. You've totally missed the point of this thread. It had nothing (as in nada, zero, zilch) to do with altruism and humanitarian efforts to relieve and help those in need from either economic misfortune or environmental disaster. Where along the lines was that miscommunicated? So please, for the love of GOD and everything holy...let's spare everyone the sappy and teary-eyed proverbial "Hero Story" of how swingers flock together to help the less fortunate. Yes, yes...I know that there have been some marvelous demonstrations of compassion, and that so-called "brotherly christian love" towards fellow-swingers, that we have all seen posted on the threads numerous times, and that's all good and I'm sure Jesus is happy about that....but trust me, that was in no way the intention of this thread. I should know, I originated it. :) This was a wholly tongue-in-cheek thread, meant to draw an amusing glance at a previously deleted thread that involved an "offer" of exchanging manual labor for sex. An offer of prostitution. Not a friend asking a friend for help to re-roof their house. If you want to revel in the friendship and altruism of your fellow swingers....please, start your own damned thread, and quit hijacking this one! :) J

YOLO Cruise April 26 2009 - swingers cruise - We just came back from the pscruise09, and didn't expect to be cruising again so soon, but we couldn't pass this up. We were tired of wearing wristbands! Looking forward to meeting you all, Lisa and Rich

What would you do? - what does a person do when their spouse no longer wishes to paticipate -

SPALD,

Swinging is a recreational thing. It should never define your relationship. As in anything in life, you have to be fluid, dynamic and open-minded, all while realizing your limits and the limits of your partner. Swinging is not a neccessity. Before we all made it real, it was a fantasy. No one can convince me that fantasies must be a reality or we'll all die. If that were the case, then the only people on earth would be rich or those that care nothing for material things. Healthy swinging is something you can pick-up and lay down. If you need to swing, I think you are in it for the wrong reasons. I think "lifestyle" is a bad word. This is not a lifestyle. It's a sexual choice. We don't live to swing or swing to live. We swing because we are horny and want some strange. There is nothing mysterious about it. We are sexual creatures and swingers just do not allow religious (moral) restraint to interfere with their sex life. That's my opinion.

-Don-

Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - We think the problem is that people see the equation "sex = love". IOW, if I have sex with you, I must love you. Therefore polyamory and swinging are the same. After all, if I don't love you, I won't be having sex with you. The way I see it, swinging is like a game of golf or tennis. I might play a game with you but I don't love you. Similarly, I might have sex with you but I don't love you. Poly, IMO, is basically having a relationship with that other person and sex is involved on some level. Kinda like "I'm in love with you and oh, BTW, lets make love" The way we see it, swinging is about exchanging sexual partners for recreation sex. In an orgy situation at a party, you can have sex with that person with zero words exchanged. In a poly relationship, there is a real connection going on besides just sex. Sex becomes incidental just like it is with married couples. With swinging, there is no emotional attachment. Is that a good thing? Well, it depends. We need to understand the very simple nature of things. We do this to avoid that. That is human nature. Many swingers DON'T want emotional attachments and avoid them because of the complications they cause in the first one. Are there benefits to the attachments? You bet. Is there a price to pay for that benefit? But of course. Is it worth it to you? That depends on your viewpoint. In our life as a couple, the problems poly cause BASED ON OUR OPINION (your's may vary and no right and wrong here) do not outweigh the payoff. IOW, we don't think the benefits of a poly relationship are worth the problems it creates based on our opinion. YMMV

Having a Swingres day at lagoon - Swingers at lagoon - yea we would luv it would familys be welcome that way the kids can come and enjoy the day too

Polyamory - polyanorous couples. - [quote=SUGARSANDSPICE][b]By general definition all swingers are polyamorous.[/b] Polyamory (from Greek ???? [poly, meaning many or several] and Latin amor [love]) is the practice, desire, or acceptance of having more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved. Polyamory is a less specific term than polygamy, the practice or condition of having more than one spouse. The majority of polygamous cultures are traditionally polygynous, where one husband has multiple wives. Polyandrous societies, in which one wife has multiple husbands, are less common but do exist. Marriage is not a requirement in polyamorous relationships. [/quote] That is the wikipedia definition and is not correct.

Swinging/Polyamory - I just wanted to hear other people thoughs on this....... - Exactly, so instead of saying your a swinger, you should use specifics. Like we are full-swap or we are soft-swap or we are seek polyamory. We are all swingers. It's like saying we are all human, but we have uniquity in ethnicity. I agree that labels help. However, the label swinger doesn't apply to full-swap. It's simply not the way the word was intended. It's not what it means. "Full swap" means "full swap". Swinger means someone that deviates from the moral a social norms of their society with regard to sex. Libertine encompasses swinging because it falls under the scope of being morally unrestrained. I am a libertine by definition and swinging is only one aspect of that word. There was a couple here not too long ago that was spreading intolerance by telling others they weren't swingers because they didn't "full swap". I called bullshit. This is far from the truth. I think tactics like that are used to pressure people that aren't comfortable with full swap into swapping. WE ARE ALL SWINGERS. -D-

Bubulaplease - Confidentiality - Something that has bothered me a little bit...when we went to Lumpys the doorman asked if we were there for the Sinful event. We says yes and as we were walking down the stairs some people upstairs asked him what was going on and he said it was a swingers party. I mentioned it to a few people that night and it seemed that it was a normal occurrence. We realize that going to the events we may run into someone we know, however, people who don't know about our lifestyle also go to lumpys. I would hate for them to know there was a swingers party going on and then see us leaving or something. My question..is this normal? Is it this way at, say, Sandy Station? Do the group organizers ask for confidentiality?

What's the universal swinger signal? - How can you spot a swinger?? - As T4REAL69 has already said, this is an old topic that's been hashed and rehashed here on the Forums more times than any of us can count. And I always answer the question the same way. How can you tell if someone is a Swinger? "If you look over in the other bed, and see a man fucking your wife, while you're fucking his, there's a pretty good chance they're Swingers."