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Newbie "outdoorsy" couple interested in the softer side. - Wish to develop a friendship with another couple in S ID, N UT - [quote=Canvas][quote=LILMISSRIDINGHOOD]There are couples and singles in the lifestyle, who have been in the lifestyle for a while, who also like to take things slow. Some don't want to just jump into bed, but they are aware of the many ins and outs of the lifestyle. I've been in the LS for years, but prefer to make friends, first, then decide if I want to go further if they, too, want to go further. If you want a friendship with no sexual strings attached, I suggest you look for others who feel the same. Narrowing your search down to just newbies, or suggesting that's what you're looking for, limits your options. You might consider meeting people with the precondition that you don't swap, but you may reconsider at a later date. [/quote] Thanks for your input. It is appreciated! Our thinking with looking for newbies was that we could all be nervous together and learn together. However, it's not like we know our way around these waters. All this has actually been very humbling to me (male half). I'm used to diving into things and doing well from the start. Here though.... it all feels so foreign, intimidating. Maybe it's due to my wife and I marrying right out of HS. We dated others in HS but that was so long ago with entirely different maturity levels. At any rate, your point is well taken. We welcome any advice and constructive criticism we can get. Thanks again! [/quote] What, specifically, feels intimidating? Or perhaps a better question would be what do you fear? Are you afraid that one of you will fall in love with a playmate and leave the marriage? Or that one or both of you will like swinging too much and become big ole sluts? LOL Or maybe you're afraid of contracting a horrific sexually transmitted disease and your junk will fall off? *grin* Most of us are TERRIBLY bad at risk assessment and more often than not we fear things that are statistically FAR less likely to happen than things we don't seem to fear all that much. Some people won't fly in planes even though they are FAR less likely to die in a plane crash than driving their car to Walmart. And many swingers are deathly afraid of getting AIDS even though it's really quite hard to contract compared to, say, HSV, which most adults have actually already been exposed to. Identifying why you're intimidated might be a better use of your time than trying to find a needle in a haystack. But in the end, do what you're comfortable doing. If you think finding another newbie couple is the least intimidating way to dip your toes in then, by all means, do that. Those of us who have been around the scene for a while, however, could tell you some of the drawbacks to meeting people who are newbies. Personally, we would seek out a more experienced couple, albeit one who is NOT pushy and is willing to go at your pace and is looking for friendship more than sex. The reason I say that is if things DO turn sexual, a more experienced couple is less likely to freak out or have other issues that they haven't already dealt with. Either way, good luck.

Kik group for UT swingers. - Contact me if your interested in joining a KIK group for Swingers - Would love to be a part of a fun group like yours! jaybry6 kik

Swingers Clubs in San Diego area - Looking for Swinger clubs in San Diego - try kasidie dot com alot of locals and local clubs

Messages - why don't people want to message back - 1. All the sites are crawling with fake couple profiles that are pic collectors or guys trying to cheat. 2. People here have the idea of dabbling but are not serious about it. 3. People have their ideal encounter in their head and are only looking for that exact situation. 4. People are simply lazy. They wanna push a button (like the FR one) and let you do all the work. 5. People totally content with swinging are already in an established party or meet group and have people come to them now. They are tons of fun, experienced swingers that know how to balance normal life and swinging life. So we always tell newbs there is a huge learning curve to this lifestyle. No, it’s not the sex part, we all already do that, it’s the ability to sort through the mess and find connections. Living where you do makes it even harder. Try some other sites to see if they fit better. AFF usually has a good listing in your area. Try posting up something when you have free time and see what comes your way. Don’t jump at every friend request. Our experience over 4 years is the blind ones with no message lead no where. We use the sites for first contact, then k!k (you can live pic verify there) and chat to see if it’s a match. Remember it’s a frustrating road ahead. Even after getting to full chat and meeting time, we really only meet 5% of the people we talk to, and we are super flexible and drive many miles to meet and play. Just keep at it. We are to the point now we can spot most flakes, cheaters and collectors quickly and we block and move on. When you do finally meet just be open. Network, be friends, that can lead to parties or new friends. Start looking to just meet cool fucking people and learn from there.

Where to go, what to do. - Non club activities - Hoe about a swingers bowling league ?

YOLO Cruise April 26 2009 - swingers cruise - 21 days and counting !!! :D

Looking to establish a group of safe swingers - - We would love to join the right couples. Mosstly for like minded friendship, but in regards to sex... Everyone has their thing, no offense to those who want condoms, but he finds them to be a turn off. He is too analytical, lol: if you kiss, do oral with your tongue, then fluids are exchanging! With birth control, vasectomy, etc... why use condoms? She also likes the idea of a guy loosing all control and not able to avoid cumming in her pussy. Ergo: tested and would love to find other couples who are safe, clean, D&D free, tested and can be regulars wihout too much worry.

Why so much hate in the swingers world... - - AKLIM69, Look at the "who's online" button under the SEARCH/BROWSE tab. There are plenty of people online right now seeking single males. Granted they are the minority, but from my locale, the search brought a 20-30% return per page, for those seeking single males. Again, it's not up to you or I to dictate what it sexually acceptable for everyone else. If that were the case swinging should be outlawed because we sure as hell are not the majority compared to the rest of the country. -D-

Feeling a bit far out in left field.. - How to meet people... - [quote=WYOFUNLUV]Adult friend finder is not a bad place to start either. More singles than couples but the singles may lead you to some gatherings or meet an greets. Also on yahoo groups there is a group called Minn-Dak_social_club. Its a fairly active group that I have used when I travel to North Dakota but I know there are few South Dakotans on it. Also I know its a ways off but when Sturgis is happening there are a few groups that magically pop up around that time keep your eyes open. SLS is a great lifestyle site that can also point you in the right direction. Try this site also http://www.fabswingers.com/browse/country/USA/South_Dakota Just google South Dakota Swingers lots of different places. May take a little work but worth the effort. Good luck[/quote] If you ever come back through or into the area...;)

Why do people.... - Booty calls - [quote=JSTJIM72] Seriously.... We're supposed to be open minded, swinging people and this site is about as judgmental as anything I have ever seen. [/quote] First, about "rules" and things, and people complaining when someone "breaks" them. In any group of people there are going to be expected ways of behaving and doing things, no matter how open minded the people in the group are. For example, take a group of folks who pride themselves on being "free" and doing what they want to do, the Hells Angels Motorcycle Club. They have a set of bylaws maybe an inch thick, telling members what to do or not do. Swingers in general [b]are [/b]more open minded than most, or they wouldn't be doing this. That's why I like them so much. By being swingers, they automatically have at least one attitude that I really like. But not necessarily all swingers are all [b]that[/b] open minded, sometimes it's limited to paying no attention to who society says you should or shouldn't be having sex with. People have their prejudices and expectations regarding others, no matter what they're doing. This'll sound like [b]my[/b] rant, and I suppose to some extent it is. I've never posted a booty call, and I never will. And I've only ever responded to one of them. Why? Because I know it'll be a waste of time because of peoples' assumptions and expectations. Like you, I'm not uber any of those things, except maybe smooth if you're talking about body hair, which I doubt you are. I'm good looking, not fat, and am probably the most non-judgmental and open minded guy you'll ever run into. Unless someone does or says something just plain mean to or about someone else, then I get pissed off and my normal open mindedness gets kind of lost. But I [b]do[/b] have a really big issue finding people, let alone single girls, to play with. Why? because I'm [b]old[/b]. And pretty much everyone has all kinds of assumptions about that. It makes no difference that I don't act, or think, or have any of the attitudes someone "my age" is assumed to have. It doesn't matter that I look, based on what other people think, literally decades (well, 2 of them, that